Home Politics & Debate
Come and join our Support Circle, every Tuesday, 8 - 9:30pm! Limited spaces available! Sign up here

Why do men shout at women in the street?



  • SkiveSkive No discipline. No morality. No respect. New ForestPosts: 15,194 Skive's The Limit
    I will physically defend myself, my family or my property but I've never said it acceptable to hit people simply because they've insulted you?
    Yesterday is history
    Tomorrow is a mystery
    But today is a gift
    That’s why it’s call the present
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well, in this thread you have suggested that men are most afraid that other men will "Kill them". In another thread you recommended that another User beat someone up because they were punched by the guy...

    That certainly gives a little insight into your views that doesn't fit with the type of world I live in. I'm not suggesting that you are wrong in your assessment, based on your own social circle, but it just doesn't fit with mine.

    I cannot remember the last time I was fearful of another person. I know I can look after myself because on the occasions I have needed to, I did. This stops me worrying about what someone can do to me.

    Or rather, I simply copied and pasted someone else's comment and changed a word around...that's hardly a statement of personal experience or conviction.

    I recommended he called someone out who'd sucker punched him at a party. That's violence in a totally different context to what's being discussed here and it gives you insight in nothing other than I don't believe turning the other cheek.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Skive wrote: »

    I think this fucked up. It came from a quote that the most men had to be scared of was being laughed at and the most women had to be scared of was being killed. When it pointed out that in fact being murdered by a stranger is a problem for both men and women, you lot rubbish it as drunken men fighting each other.

    Try reading the quote properly.

    It says that what men are most afraid that women will do to them is laugh at them, whereas women are afraid that men will kill them.

    It says nothing about what men have to fear from other men. I've made no comment about that whatsoever.

    The point is, this thread started off being about men harassing women in the street, and has turned into a discussion of men being victims of violent attacks by other men. I don't doubt that that's a problem, I just don't see how its relevant to the original question at all, and seems to have arisen from that usual thing that happens in any discussion about women's issues, give long enough: someone tries to undermine or belittle the original problem being discussed by saying "but men have loads of problems too!"

    Well sure, but weren't we talking about something else?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When I originally posted that quote - which I didn't come up with, by the way, I just read somewhere - it wasn't intended to make any generalizations about women being more likely to be victims of violent crime than men. At that point, the thread hadn't been so badly derailed, and was still about men harassing women in the street.

    It was not intended to illuminate anything about likelihood of being a victim of violent crime, as I have no idea what those probabilities are. I mentioned it simply as a rhetorical way of highlighting why it is that women find the kind of supposedly harmless, innocent, macho behaviour that some men engage in, like shouting, whistling, leering etc so frightening. Because we never know if that's all it's going to be. And moreover, there are times when we have to assume that all men are potential rapists, because if we don't, and do something foolish like walk home late at night on our own, or go back to someone's flat without wanting to have sex with them, we will later be at least partly blamed if we are raped.

    I think that men can sometimes find this difficult to understand because they know that when they shout things at women in the street or whistle or whatever, they're joking, it's not intended to be intimidating, and if it happened to them, they would obviously know it was a joke and wouldn't take it seriously, and then the suggestion is, aren't women oversensitive, aren't they touchy, men who who shout stuff at them are only trying to compliment them, they should be flattered, etc. But that's because men don't quite understand what it's like to be afraid of sexual violence in that way.

    That is my only point. Quite how that was twisted to suggest I think men don't have to be afraid of anything is quite staggering. I have no idea what it's like to be afraid that someone will beat me up or stab me, it's true. I don't claim to. Perhaps someone should start a thread about it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    jamelia wrote: »
    Well sure, but weren't we talking about something else?

    I think we were, but we all agree that men who shout abuse and grope women in public are arseholes who need to be put on a register.

    And where's the fun if we all agree? :D
  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Warming up? Posts: 16,688
    There's this post too: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-12969922

    Personally, I find Marcelle D'Argy Smith's opinion to be quite OTT. According to her, if I understood correctly, nothing is polite and anything that comes from a stranger is a priori rude.
Sign In or Register to comment.