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Friends haven't commented on weight loss...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Not sure if I have put this thread in the right forum..

I started weight watchers back in April and so far have lost 2 stone 10lbs and have also gone down from a size 14-16 to a 10-12. my family, boyfriend and people I work with have all commented on my weight loss - even people I hardly know have said stuff because I am a lot smaller. anyway, the only people who haven't said a single thing is my friends! as in my best friends!!! I am really upset about it..either they don't think I look any different or they just take no notice of me at all. I haven't told them that I am dieting but surely 2stone 10lbs is a lot of weight to just lose for no reason!! It really gets me down because it would mean so much for them to say something nice to me for once because they never compliment me or my clothes...not noticing my weight loss is like a kick in the teeth. I know that I look good, I know that I am better looking than them (sorry to sound horribly arrogant) but despite these things, it would still be nice to seek their approval for once because I say nice stuff to them...

anyway sorry if this sounds a bit of a silly problem...I just don't have that much self confidence and them not saying anything is making me feel as though I have put the hard work in for nothing...

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know that I look good, I know that I am better looking than them (sorry to sound horribly arrogant)

    it does sound arrogant. maybe they've already picked up these vibes from you so have chosen not to inflate your ego any further?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    clementine_the_tangerine wrote: »
    it does sound arrogant. maybe they've already picked up these vibes from you so have chosen not to inflate your ego any further?

    but how is commenting on someone's weight loss inflating their ego? it is simply making a observation..
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    no your ego seems pretty inflated already. maybe they sense that you 'know' that you are better looking than them so need no compliments.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    little_tiny_flower wrote: »
    but how is commenting on someone's weight loss inflating their ego? it is simply making a observation..

    It's inflating YOUR ego. Why exactly do you want to hear about those observations? Do you want to hear negative observations too? Like that you don't know how to apply make-up if your life depended on it, that you have bad skin or body odor?

    I don't think this is just an "observation" to you, otherwise you wouldn't be bothered when they didn't make this observation, like if they observed that it sure is a nice sunny day for late September. Guess you wouldn't care about that.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Are you losing weight for yourself or for other people?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hopefully your friends like you, love you, whatever weight you are. I intentionally try not to comment on my friends' weights as I think there is enough pressure on people to be body beautiful, whereas I consider my friends beautiful regardless of their weight. Perhaps this is how they feel about you?

    You should tell them that you have lost weight and you think you look better and that you want to know their opinion on your looks. Their opinion obviously matters to you - give them the opportunity to say what you want them to, withouth having to be mind readers.

    It could be a little worrying that you are so keen for validation on your weight loss, whilst ignoring the compliments you have already received but, I might be reading too much into it? Like namaste says, do you know who you're loosing weight for and why? And, can you stop now?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Weight is kind of personal and maybe they are not comfortable making personal remarks about people. Depending on the context it can be very rude.
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    Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    I wouldn't comment on somebody's visible weight difference. I'd be too afraid that it was just chance that made the difference and my comment might lead them to starve themselves if it started coming on again.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    clementine_the_tangerine wrote: »
    imaybe they've already picked up these vibes from you so have chosen not to inflate your ego any further?

    Nail. Head.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    little_tiny_flower wrote: »
    I know that I look good, I know that I am better looking than them

    fucking hell love, you've got a big ego aint ya?

    its no wonder your friends haven't said anything if thats what you are like! they probably don't want to give you a bigger head!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    blah blah blah wrote: »
    fucking hell love, you've got a big ego aint ya?

    its no wonder your friends haven't said anything if thats what you are like! they probably don't want to give you a bigger head!
    Exactly.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you've said before in another thread that you think you're better looking than them. maybe this is the issue you need to address because really i dont know anybody that would say out loud that they're better looking than their friends :eek2: why does it even matter? i definitely think clementine is right, because if any of my friends had lost weight id definitely comment on it. theres a reason they arent commenting on yours and its probably because of the vibes you're giving out.
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