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self harm help

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
ive been self harming on and off for years, been doing well reacently but lately its all i can think about, i dont want to start again and just wondered if anyone had any advice

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Do you know why you are self harming x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sometimes i find myself going over and over things in my head and the only way i can make it stop is by hurting myself
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Is there anybody you could discuss the problems with? If not you should try and find a more positive outlet for the feelings you are having. failing that try and make an appointment to see your GP.

    Hope you do't end up harming yourself again
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i dot have anyone to talk to about stuff, i dont make friends easily and my experiences of councilling have not worked out so well
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Is there anything in particular that has made you not like councelling, or have problems with it?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I can relate with you on the counselling. It's good that you are asking for help and advice instead of just going ahead with harming yourself. Has something recently changed in your life that could of triggered the thoughts of self-harm to start again?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    the first session i had i poured out all my problems to my counciller who gave me a leaflet and a follow up appoinment, the end result was me walking back home crying my eyes out and then just sitting at home feeling ten times worse than i did before.

    The next appoinment went pretty much the same way to the point where i go in tell them what they want to hear and go home again
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    warforged wrote: »
    the first session i had i poured out all my problems to my counciller who gave me a leaflet and a follow up appoinment, the end result was me walking back home crying my eyes out and then just sitting at home feeling ten times worse than i did before.

    The next appoinment went pretty much the same way to the point where i go in tell them what they want to hear and go home again

    Of course you are going to feel upset and emotional if you pour out a lot of information about why you self harm.

    Telling them what they want to hear isnt going to help you get any better in the slightest. If anything it could make things worse.

    It might be difficult to tell them the truth, is it just to avoid feeling upset that you dont tell them everything, or some other reason.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thats understandable that you would be upset, you basically dragged up everything that was on your mind on one go which, especially for a first or second counselling session, I can imagine would be quite a lot, and may of dragged up some painful memories. Maybe it would be worth giving counselling another shot, but take it at a slower pace, make sure you are comfortable enough with your counselor to open up to them, and then slowly begin telling them what you feel your issues are.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    G wrote: »
    Of course you are going to feel upset and emotional if you pour out a lot of information about why you self harm.

    Telling them what they want to hear isnt going to help you get any better in the slightest. If anything it could make things worse.

    It might be difficult to tell them the truth, is it just to avoid feeling upset that you dont tell them everything, or some other reason.

    its just to avoid feeling upset,i know thats a self defeating attitude but i cant help it, i feel so low if i let everything out that its easier not to
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    JamieRamus wrote: »
    Thats understandable that you would be upset, you basically dragged up everything that was on your mind on one go which, especially for a first or second counselling session, I can imagine would be quite a lot, and may of dragged up some painful memories. Maybe it would be worth giving counselling another shot, but take it at a slower pace, make sure you are comfortable enough with your counselor to open up to them, and then slowly begin telling them what you feel your issues are.

    thats a problem as well, i dont feel comfortable with anyone esp when im supposed to open up to them and tell them things no-one else knows about me
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Do you not have any close friends or family members you could open up too instead of a counselor? If not would you feel comfortable enough to discuss your problems on the forum here? No one is going to judge or look down on you, you could give as much or as little information about yourself and your issues as you want and everyone will try their best to help you out
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    JamieRamus wrote: »
    Do you not have any close friends or family members you could open up too instead of a counselor? If not would you feel comfortable enough to discuss your problems on the forum here? No one is going to judge or look down on you, you could give as much or as little information about yourself and your issues as you want and everyone will try their best to help you out

    no friends and i dont see my family anymore,
    i just feel that i dont belong anywhere,that i dont fit in and that eveyone is judging me for how i look or what i say to them,i still remember(and worry)about conversations i had with people years ago
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If people judge you, then you need to learn (as hard as it is) to not let it affect you. You are your own person and why should it matter what these people think of you?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Everyone belongs somewhere, sometimes it just hard to find where and may take a while to find where it is. And I agree with G, you shouldn't let what people think of you bother you. I think it's better to worry about what I think of people than what they think of me
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i know it shouldnt matter, and sometimes i can almost belive it doesnt
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    No one has the right to judge you. And as I said before no one here will judge you
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    JamieRamus wrote: »
    No one has the right to judge you. And as I said before no one here will judge you

    its just my reasons for harming dont seem like "real" reasons either,i mean being scared of people -how pathetic is that?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    They might not be "real" reasons to others, but obviously there is a reason that they feel real enough for you. And it doesn't matter if they are real to others, they are your problems and obviously they will affect you more than they will people who do not understand how you feel. In no way is it pathetic
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Going on a more positive note, are there any hobbies you have or activities you like doing or want to try?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you're having a relapse, it's perfectly normal. I've been through it too just like so many people who self-harm. Learning tricks that still give you pain but don't damage your body are good, like melting an ice cube in your hand, eating really hot food or taking a cold shower. (The shower one is also good because water helps relax the muscles in your body and calm you down.)
    Hope this helps xx
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