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Hard times.
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ok this is a difficult thing for me to talk about and I've tried talking to people face to face about it but I cant bring myself to do it. it's also long winded.
Last year my nan became very ill and at this time I wasn't working so I looked after her. Shortly after I started this, my dad got cancer and went into hospital for 3 weeks and had most of his left lung removed and followed with a 12 week course of chemotherapy. He was told they had managed to get rid of it but there was a high chance of it coming back.
It has done, as I found out two days ago.
I was invited out last night to a mates house and from there we would be going into town which I couldnt really afford but they said where we were going was free entry and then 80p drinks before 1am.
So I agreed.
We went and went in a bar first where one of them noticed something wasnt right with me and took me aside and dug it out of me and I ended up breaking down and advised me to tell one other person who ive known longest. But I didnt. Not yet anyway.
So we went the the club where it was supposed to be cheap and it turned out not to be the case. I couldnt afford it and they all went and drew more money out and i said i was going home and walked away.
It's just been getting to me because I felt abandoned and alone. For a night out it was pretty depressing. I've also previously plied one of them with beer when hes been skint and it seemed to go forgotten then.
I don't particularly know what to say to any of them now.
What should I/ would you do?
Last year my nan became very ill and at this time I wasn't working so I looked after her. Shortly after I started this, my dad got cancer and went into hospital for 3 weeks and had most of his left lung removed and followed with a 12 week course of chemotherapy. He was told they had managed to get rid of it but there was a high chance of it coming back.
It has done, as I found out two days ago.
I was invited out last night to a mates house and from there we would be going into town which I couldnt really afford but they said where we were going was free entry and then 80p drinks before 1am.
So I agreed.
We went and went in a bar first where one of them noticed something wasnt right with me and took me aside and dug it out of me and I ended up breaking down and advised me to tell one other person who ive known longest. But I didnt. Not yet anyway.
So we went the the club where it was supposed to be cheap and it turned out not to be the case. I couldnt afford it and they all went and drew more money out and i said i was going home and walked away.
It's just been getting to me because I felt abandoned and alone. For a night out it was pretty depressing. I've also previously plied one of them with beer when hes been skint and it seemed to go forgotten then.
I don't particularly know what to say to any of them now.
What should I/ would you do?
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Comments
speak to your friends and tell them that you have to put your family first at the moment, and they will understand. then say that when you need time out you would love to see them but you can't afford to go out. suggest that they come round to your house or you to theirs where you can have a cup of tea for free, or maybe going somewhere that doesn't cost like a park. if your friends want to spend time with you then they won't mind i'm sure.
Hey dont feel bad. Your friends couldnt have been there for you like you needed them to be because they dont know the full extent of how you feel. Talk to them! I had this problem when my dad got cancer and had to go on 'kemo'. In the end I leaned on my friends alot and it felt better to have them around me. I hope you speak to them and get the support you need.