Home Health & Wellbeing
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.

Whats wrong with my head?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I feel hopeless and confused. I simply can not shake the feelings I am having. I haven't been able to shake them for months, and they are getting worse.

I have come to the boards with self-harming issues before, but now I am looking for help on a different topic.

Why do I have trouble being separated from my boyfriend? I cry and tell myself I feel sick. Sometimes I hurt myself so he will stay. (Maybe separation anxiety?) It has gone to the extremes and it intereferes with my life and our relationship. My only guess for the cause of this was the memories of my father abandoning me. I guess I am scared he will disappear. Can my behaivor be diagnosed?

Sadly, this is not all. I know I have social anxiety, it has been part of my life for a long time. I have been given labels such as "antisocial", "lonely", and "extremely shy". I've read the pages on TheSite, but it seems I need to hear from somebody that has been through this. I can't make eye contact, and I get really scared I won't be able to carry on a conversation or I will be embarassed. Normally the smallest comment embarasses me and makes me cry so easily.

I wish I didn't get upset so easily. I don't know if there is a name for whats wrong with my head. This is a lot to deal with, I also have trouble focusing. When I try to do something, I am easily frustrated and I believe I'm stupid and I can't do anything right. Sometimes I throw whatever I am working on against the wall. I have no idea why this happens.

If someone were to ask me how I feel about myself right now, this would be my answer...

I'm just so stupid. My head feels all screwed up and I feel like crying every five seconds. Everyone is so much better than me, I really just don't want to try. Talking to people scares me, and I hate myself for missing out on huge social events everybody talks about. Most of all, I am upset that I can't break my clingy behaivor to my boyfriend. It upsets him, but he tries his best to understand me, but I really don't understand myself. Most of the time I am alone, tired, and upset over something all the time. I don't feel like anyone would try to help me.

...

I really don't expect a reply. Please don't waste your time on me if you have better things to do. I don't know if I have a name for the mental issues I am facing, but its interfereing with my quality of life.

Fingers crossed, I hope I find help. :(

Comments

  • LilzoLilzo Posts: 38 Boards Initiate
    Hello missingthecure,

    Sorry to hear that you’ve not been feeling too good recently.

    It sounds as though there are couple of things going on at the moment; with anxiety over your boyfriend leaving you leading you to be more clingy with him, and general anxiety which is getting in the way of your day to day life.

    As you said in your post, some of your fears of abandonment may come from your father leaving when you were younger and this may be effecting how you are feeling now.

    Have you ever been to anyone to speak to them about your feelings? It might be a good idea to go and visit your GP and see what they say. There are lots of options out there for speaking to someone, including counsellors, psychotherapists. Your doctor will be able to speak to you more about these options. This article goes a little more into it.

    You could also try giving Saneline a call. http://www.sane.org.uk/SANEline Tel: 0845 767 8000. They are confidential helpline offering practical information and emotional support to people affected by any sort of mental health problems.

    There’s lots of help out there for you, sometimes it’s just knowing where to go. I hope these resources are useful, let us know how you get on and keep posting.

    Take care,

    Lilzo :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Take a rest so that your stress can get out of your head.:wave:
Sign In or Register to comment.