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Changes in behaviour
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I recently met this guy from college, we got talking over the internet and he seemed interested at first, he would say hello as soon as i logged on and would talk none stop really. After we met IRL for a chat etc to get to know him hes been different, he wont say hello to me unless i start the conversation.
Anyone got any idea what this means? i feel like im over thinking it all.
Anyone got any idea what this means? i feel like im over thinking it all.
0
Comments
Maybe he is busy?
Maybe he just lost interest, because he always had to say "hello" first, without you ever doing a step towards him?
This is actually nothing noticeable to me. When you like talking to him then something I notice is, that you wait for him to say hello first. Try to not interpret too much in it.
how can you be so sure?
And I used to be like that with girls I liked in school, I'd always pretend to not notice them until they said 'hi'. Don't ask me why.
That's my guess as well.
Things going 'quite well' when you met doesn't have to mean a thing. Most people tend not to run away screaming when they go on a date that doesn't quite work for them.
In my experience, it's only how they react afterwards that tells the real story.
it seems less weirder now.
I mean it wasnt a "date" persay, I seen it more of a "Lets talk IRL thing"..it was an innocent coffee really.. but meh..he gave me a hug willingly at the end though? that counts right:chin:
So his not saying hello first might be more of an attention seeking manouevre, because if you come to HIM then you must be interested, etc.
I'm not saying this is what the situation is, it's just something else to consider.
I have to say though, you could always ask him. Nobody likes to appear insecure or needy but you could ask him if the meeting did anything to change his perceptions of you or his feelings towards you. If you ask him to be totally, or brutally, honest then he may be bold enough to do so.
These are my thoughts. I'm only a newbie though so don't kill me pls! :crazyeyes
Brutally asking him even though were only friends?
isnt that sorta asking him out? XD
Lol, not really :P Your level of thought over this suggest that you are interested in more than friendship. Even if that's not the case you are still concerned about why he seems different since you met. So the best way to find out is to ask.
You don't have to make it like shining a spotlight on his face in a darkened room. You could just ask him about his perceptions of you before you met up and whether meeting you changed those at all? Whether you were like he'd imagined, etc. You may have already done that.
Limbo is the crappiest place to be, so unless you can just put the thoughts out of your mind and accept this friendship/relationship for whatever it is then you might as well try and put your mind at rest by talking to him about it. If he likes you, cool. If he likes you as a friend, also maybe cool. If he thought one thing but has kind of changed his mind then fine, at least you'll know.
I am always in favour of clearing up ambiguity. Knowing where you stand, bad or good, always makes it easier to sleep at night
Sounds good, and yeah you are right, i'd like more than friendship. Might ask him then. Its a bit of an awkward question i think. Hmm:chin:
It is not, if he is interested in you too. If he doesn't, pff, who cares. I just broke the news to my girl of interest that I have a crush on her and that was that.
I appreciate your input, but you dont have to be such a jerk.
I think you misunderstood me there, but my bus comes in 10 minutes and I have to hurry, so i make it short:
I wasn't being offensive.
break the news to him, he will be forthcoming if he likes you and you'll know immediatelly and probably painlessly if he does not. So win/win
It was a date