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First time problems

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
me and my gf have been together for say 3-4 months and we have been talking about having sex for a good month just waiting for the right tme. oh yeah were both virgins. anyway today it felt like the right time and her parents were out all day so we went up to her romm and well yeah. after a some making out i said are you sure your ready and she said yes. so we both got naked and i slipped on a condom and then was about to :naughty: but i just couldnt get it in. i felt a little bit embarassed and started to lose my erection and well it all just went down hill. i actually wanted to die. she was very understanding and really great about it but i feel so shit. we both got dressed and went to eat some food and watch a movie and try to forget about the whole thing.

anyway now im really scared that when we try again ill be so nervous i wont be able to get an erection at all

has this ever happened to anyone its just really given my confdence a knock and im already really quite depressed atm for other reasons anyone got anything to say that might make me feel better or any tips for next time we try

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think this is quite common, or at least I can name a couple of mates this has happened to when it was their first time having sex. I can imagine it would be pretty embarrassing at the time, but I really do think it's pretty common.

    I don't really have any great advice, apart from the usual cliches that are to ensure you're both really relaxed, and not to put too much pressure on it being a huge event. I think there's an article on thesite somewhere about first time sex, reading that'll will probably make you feel a bit less worried. If it happens again, it happens again, but practice makes perfect!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i think first times are generally going to be like that. i know with my first boyfriend, we tried to have sex and i was just so nervous i would 'let him in' so to speak.
    as kate said, just relax, take it slowly and yes...practice makes perfect!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yes it is very common, you just both need to relax!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Once the job's done you'll look back and wonder what all the fuss was about!

    Just take it slow, build up and make sure you're both very turned on and relaxed. Everything will just 'fall into place' :P
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah just keep going at it you'll get there eventually.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i say lots of foreplay first and even if you don't end up having sex, when you do eventually you might be a bit more relaxed and therefore it should happen a little easier.

    Have fun!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thanks for the usefull comments
    oh yh do you think we should wait a couple of weeks and then try or is it a jump straight back on the horse kinda thing lol
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What is in a name wrote: »
    thanks for the usefull comments
    oh yh do you think we should wait a couple of weeks and then try or is it a jump straight back on the horse kinda thing lol


    Seriously, most men have this problem, try not to panic or worry about doing it, as that can mean you lose an erection. If you try and enjoy it, have a laugh and you'll be fine in the end! Good Luck!:thumb:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Whatever you are both comfortable with, why not try not setting any expectations of when it will happen and then when you both feel ready then try again. Although having sex normally involves penetration there is no real reason that you can't do other things to pleasure each other if you find that its difficult for you to enter her. Don't be upset or frustrated if it happens again, maybe just carry on with the kissing and touching and see what happens.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    its very comon and its more of a case she was not relaxed enough you need to do much more foreplay on her so that her vagina will relax and lewt you in plus use tons of lube
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    now im still a virgin too, and ive been thinking about it too so i googled about it and read evvery article. in every one it said it will be hard to get it in the first time especially if the hymen is in tact. they said you might have guide yourself in with your hand, and shouldnt be emarrassed if you cant get it in the first ouple of tries.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It happened to me the first time I had sex, as we were both virgins. The next time round, it was fine.
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