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Annaarrr!!
Posts: 876 Part of The Mix Family
Some Advice Would Really Be Great !!
Well I'm Not Sure Whether This Is A Major Problem But I Want A Rant And I Didn't Know What To Do So Here Goes...
Righty, Well My First Thing Is About The Thing They Call Education. I'm In The Top Class For Every Subject And I Have Just Taken My First Math GCSE. I Just Feel That The School Is Putting So Much Pressure On Me To Do All These Things And I Don't Feel Capable Anymore. I Can't Concentrate In My Lessons And I Feel Like I'm Drifting Through Life With No Purpose Or Future. My Homework Is Piling Up And Whenever I Try To Sit Down And Do It I'm Immediately Frustrated Because I Have To Read Through The Stuff From The Lesson Five Times Just To Get A Grasp On What I'm Doing Or Nag My Friends To Tell Me What To Do. :nervous:
When I'm Not In School I Try To Keep Myself Busy Other Wise I Eat Or Think, Neither Of Which Are Good For Me Seeing As Past Experiances Have Shown That If I Eat A Chocolate Bar I Balloon To A Massive Size And Thinking Just Generally Hurts =/ I Do Dancing Two Nights A Week And Cadets Once A Week. Doing These Leaves Me Exhausted Because Sleep And Me re Disagreeing Which Eachother At This Moment In Time. When I'm Not Doing Those And Trying At Failing To Do My Homework I Have To Fit In My Boyfriend... And Because I'm Not Good At That I Get To See Him ProperlyAbout Once A Week Because We're Not Even Allowed To Touch In School. This Is Making Us Both Mehh And It's All My Fault Because It's Me And My Life THat's Getting In The Way. The Weekends Are Unpredictable At The Moment As Something Normally Comes Up And Makes It Worse For Us...
I Sound Like A Massive Moaner But I Am Happy ( I think Thats What It Is) Sometimes. I Went Out With Two Of My Closest Friends Today And Had A Bit Of A Girly Day But As Soon As I Got On That Bus I Wanted To Run Away From Me And My Life And Just Not Exist?
I Guess I Should Probably Tell My Mentor This But She MIght Tell The School Or My Parents And THey'd Blow Things Out Of Proportion Again And Interfere Way Too Much.
Oh I Also S/H For A Period Of Time And I Haven't Done It For A While. It's Such A Pain To Have To Hide Marks... I Just Pull My Hair And Bang My Head When I Feel A Bit Meh... Thats Not Bad Is It?
Its A Bit Long Sorry =/
Like I Said I Dont Know If This Is Really A Problem
Any Advice On What I Should Do Would Be Appreciated...
Thanks x
Well I'm Not Sure Whether This Is A Major Problem But I Want A Rant And I Didn't Know What To Do So Here Goes...
Righty, Well My First Thing Is About The Thing They Call Education. I'm In The Top Class For Every Subject And I Have Just Taken My First Math GCSE. I Just Feel That The School Is Putting So Much Pressure On Me To Do All These Things And I Don't Feel Capable Anymore. I Can't Concentrate In My Lessons And I Feel Like I'm Drifting Through Life With No Purpose Or Future. My Homework Is Piling Up And Whenever I Try To Sit Down And Do It I'm Immediately Frustrated Because I Have To Read Through The Stuff From The Lesson Five Times Just To Get A Grasp On What I'm Doing Or Nag My Friends To Tell Me What To Do. :nervous:
When I'm Not In School I Try To Keep Myself Busy Other Wise I Eat Or Think, Neither Of Which Are Good For Me Seeing As Past Experiances Have Shown That If I Eat A Chocolate Bar I Balloon To A Massive Size And Thinking Just Generally Hurts =/ I Do Dancing Two Nights A Week And Cadets Once A Week. Doing These Leaves Me Exhausted Because Sleep And Me re Disagreeing Which Eachother At This Moment In Time. When I'm Not Doing Those And Trying At Failing To Do My Homework I Have To Fit In My Boyfriend... And Because I'm Not Good At That I Get To See Him ProperlyAbout Once A Week Because We're Not Even Allowed To Touch In School. This Is Making Us Both Mehh And It's All My Fault Because It's Me And My Life THat's Getting In The Way. The Weekends Are Unpredictable At The Moment As Something Normally Comes Up And Makes It Worse For Us...
I Sound Like A Massive Moaner But I Am Happy ( I think Thats What It Is) Sometimes. I Went Out With Two Of My Closest Friends Today And Had A Bit Of A Girly Day But As Soon As I Got On That Bus I Wanted To Run Away From Me And My Life And Just Not Exist?
I Guess I Should Probably Tell My Mentor This But She MIght Tell The School Or My Parents And THey'd Blow Things Out Of Proportion Again And Interfere Way Too Much.
Oh I Also S/H For A Period Of Time And I Haven't Done It For A While. It's Such A Pain To Have To Hide Marks... I Just Pull My Hair And Bang My Head When I Feel A Bit Meh... Thats Not Bad Is It?
Its A Bit Long Sorry =/
Like I Said I Dont Know If This Is Really A Problem
Any Advice On What I Should Do Would Be Appreciated...
Thanks x
0
Comments
Thanks for posting about this on the boards, this is exactly the right place for problems and feelings like yours so don't worry! Firstly, sorry to hear things are getting on top of you at school even though you're obviously doing brilliantly. I do think this is the sort of thing your mentor would like to know about, and it is the school's responsibility to look after the welfare of its pupils so if they're getting it wrong that's not at all your fault.
You do sound busy! But of course it's important to look after yourself - and both eating well and having some alone time can be a big part of that. Some of these things, particularly your insomnia, are things you could get help from a doctor about.
It's also important that you don't feel alone - whether it's your two close friends, your boyfriend or your mum, these people are all there to give you a bit of support every now and again, and I'm sure they'd be happy to do that. Perhaps you and your boyfriend could have a talk together about ways you could make things better.
The same applies if you think you have a problem either with food or with self harm - you are not alone with it. For starters, I don't know if you've seen it but there is a section on TheSite.org about Self Harm. As you'll see here, self harm comes in many forms but luckily there are lots of little coping mechanisms and also books, helplines or even support groups. Do you think the self harming could be a reaction to one or all of the things you said in the first half of your note?
Feel free to post again, and meanwhile, take care of yourself.