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Help advice please thx
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Last week I went to a club for the first time, got drunk for the first time, and had sex for the first time. I didn't know the guy, wasn't attracted to him, but he was kinda nice and was patient, I'll give him that (I didn't even bother to tell him I was a virgin). And he had just turned 20 (I'm 21), and I never wanted to be with a guy who was younger than me, just my thing. I wasn't plowed, but I think the alcohol kind of made my decisions about the guy fuzzy and more lenient than I would have sober. I had decided to do it with him mainly because it was a window of opportunity, and I wasn't sure if that would happen agian any time soon, and I was ready to loose my virginity (I know that sounds low but 1) I have a younger brother and sister, both at that age in high school where sex is definetly a possibility, and though I don't think he has yet, my brother was found with a condom in his wallet, and he's only 16. Now, I have always done things first, been the experienced leader for them in a kind of way, and one of the reasons I wanted to loose my virginity was to remain that person for them. I have always been there when they needed help or advice or to talk, and I didn't want to be the virgin much older sister who couldn't help. Also, 2) I really want to find "the guy", but he didn't see to be coming around, and 3) yes I'll admit it was a bit of peer pressure...just the fact that practically all of my friend's and co-workers have had relationships, I felt like an outcast and unable to relate with them and in their conversations.) So that's the deal, and now I am really regreting doing it with that guy, not the doing part, just the who I did it with part...mainly because he didn't really appeal to me physically, he was younger (biggest regret), and there was another guy at the club I appealed to more (but the guy I ended up with had been with me first and like I said it was practically a sure thing and I didn't want to bypass that at the time).
Any advice or comments, on how to put this behind me and move on? Am I over-reacting?
Thanks for listening (or reading I guess).
Any advice or comments, on how to put this behind me and move on? Am I over-reacting?
Thanks for listening (or reading I guess).
0
Comments
i wouldn't worry too much about the age, a year is pretty damn close, and you were both legal so again no problem. i'm guessing you aren't keeping in contact with this guy?
You probably will though! That's just what happens. The trick is not to beat yourself up about it.
Thanks again!
I was a slow learner. It took many one night stands and a bit of experimentation before I started to enjoy sex for sex's sake! Like Jamelia said, don't beat yourself up about it. You're no longer a virgin, so you can reassure yourself that you're "attractive" and be a bit more picky about your next conquest LOL!!!
I do agree with you. Those are the most effective way