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struggling with a breakup
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
hi, im new to this so here goes...
i wont go through the ins and outs of it, but basically my bf of 2 years broke up with me not long after we got to uni so he could start seeing another girl, i was devestated as i really didnt see it coming.
this was in october and im still really struggling with coming to terms with it, because (i know its naive) i really thought he was it for me.
i have anxiety depression anyway and since then my meds have been put up and ive been doing some really stupid things.
but im still really struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel - has anyone been through this? when am i going to feel normal again?
thanks for any replys
i wont go through the ins and outs of it, but basically my bf of 2 years broke up with me not long after we got to uni so he could start seeing another girl, i was devestated as i really didnt see it coming.
this was in october and im still really struggling with coming to terms with it, because (i know its naive) i really thought he was it for me.
i have anxiety depression anyway and since then my meds have been put up and ive been doing some really stupid things.
but im still really struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel - has anyone been through this? when am i going to feel normal again?
thanks for any replys
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Comments
then my flatmates started gettin abusive to me so i had to move out last month, which really leaves me with very few friends here. i miss my friends at home but they're all over the country now at their unis.
Also, when you look at it, 2 years in nothing in the grand scheme of your life and in say 5 years time he'll just be a distant memory and you'll be wondering why you were ever together. Chin up and go out with your mates, it'll get easier trust me
i think it would be easier to get over if everything else wasnt falling down around me, i wont bore u with details and im not being melodramatic it just really is. i need more uni friends! i know this sounds really bad but after said breakup ive slept around a lot because its nice not to have to worry about all this stuff all the time.
so the few ppl i do know n go out with only know me in that context and i alienate them. i dont know why i do it cuz its just not me, and i dont rlly enjoy it that much.
how do i get out of this self destructive cycle? am i just a nympho?
My suggestion is not to drink too much when you're out (I'm just guessing that you do get pretty drunk when you go off with lads as that is generally the case with everyone). You'll probably find that you make more friends when you're more aware of whats hapenning around you. I've made loads of mates at uni whom i met randomly on nights out. If your uni is anything like mine you'll find you see a lot of the same people out quite often.
:yes: top advice.
It's really not uncommon to feel as though everything is falling down around you when a serious relationship ends - it really is a horrible feeling that feels endless, but I promise you it gets easier.
Do take a look at TheSite.org's mending a broken heart article if you haven't already and if you need to rant then you know where we are.
(ignore this, it just needs to be in cyber space)
FUCKINGWANKINGTITCUNTINGTWAT
what kind of sorry prat promises to try and change so i take him back, and dumps u 3 weeks later for the girl he swears was just a friend! fucks me constantly the day before waits till i have my shoes on the next day and tells me my jealousy for said girl is too much. together a week later. AND i thought i was pregnant. AND he knew my depression was acting up. AND we knew it'd be tough the first few months of uni. man, guys like that should be castrated.
ah, thats better
Rant away!! - He sounds like a twat. You wouldn't go back to him after he's treated you that way.......WOULD YOU?!
Wow.
He sounds like an enormous prick
Set fire to him.
does feel AWESOME to rant though. anyone else want to?
somedays i have really good days, Some days i have really bad days.
As far as im concerned im better off without him anyway. Hes a c*** and ive just found out hes been sleeping with one of my friends... I was pregnant when he left me, We lived together and it was me who had to move out.
its only been 2months and i struggle daily, But the way i see it, him leaving me might have been a blessing, a lucky escape!
theres plenty more fish in the sea, and i know when people say that to you your probably thinking "but i want him, no1 else" i was like that for a fair few weeks, and suprised at myself for how well im doing. i didnt leave the house for a month untill one day i decided i wasnt going to let a man ruin my life. And that day will come for you too, the day you feel ready to let him go. I Know when people say things to you like "it will get better in time" you think it wont, but it will i promise you. The way i did it was to just delete him out of my life, everything to do with him is gone. he cant facebook me or anything. My friends have all stuck by me and ive been partying as much as i can! anything to keep my mind away from it basically!
I have my odd days where i will have a good old cry, but it doesnt happen often anymore. When your ready to let him go, it will happen and you will feel the biggest weight off ur shoulders.
i wrote him an email, saying bye basically and then blocked all contact, and i felt amazingly better.
I was determind not to sleep around, and i didnt, I never Will. Im not going to let that idiot put me off falling in love again, although i dont plan on doing it untill ive finished uni!
Theres a whole world of men out there, better than him just waiting for you lovely
He promised me the world, that he would never leave me blah blah blah, same script different cast!
I Love the Idiot with all my heart, but i love me more.
As far as im concerned, He can sleep with whome ever he chooses, He wont be coming back to me ever again, and one day he will realise his mistake. My mum always told me "always be with someone who loves you more than you love them" and its only now i see what she means.
I thought my life was over and everything was falling down around me and i couldnt stop it, but the truth is, its all picked back up again and im happy.
Chin up lovely. it will get better
Go out with your mates, have some fun, do stuff that he never wanted to do.
Yes you will still think about him, and yes, it will hurt like hell, but if you've got stuff planned to look forward to, it will be much better.
I'd just like to say, not all guys are insensitive pricks like him.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that. It's really a difficult thing to deal with. My gf left me because she felt 'confused' as she had been seeing another person. Turns out the new guy was a girl.
I managed to turn my gf so what does that say about me? I have no idea how I attract these people and I can never find anyone who gets me. I'm going through such a dry spell at the moment.
Loneliness is a bitch. But you'd never hear me admitting that anywhere else.
Hope it all gets better soon. x Andy