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when the girl is older than the guy...
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
so i have known this girl for awhile, and recently have been seeing a bit more of her. we both live in the same city and are both away from home and i guess kinda bored sometimes. anyway she seems keen on meeting up more, but my only potential problem is she is 25 and thus four years older than me, and it seems like almost every woman has this "only date older guys" rule, which is another debate really, but i wanted some tips because this often comes up on these boards when the guy is older than the girl, but i haven't seen it in this arrangement
for what its worth we get on really well and my friends are generally older than me, i have a responsible job and am no longer a student etc, whereas she is so in some ways you could argue theres no maturity gap
last girl i was with was 23 and to be honest she made a bit of an issue of it, like "oh, people YOUR age" etc, and i couldnt bear the thought of that happening again but i really like this girl
thanks!
for what its worth we get on really well and my friends are generally older than me, i have a responsible job and am no longer a student etc, whereas she is so in some ways you could argue theres no maturity gap
last girl i was with was 23 and to be honest she made a bit of an issue of it, like "oh, people YOUR age" etc, and i couldnt bear the thought of that happening again but i really like this girl
thanks!
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Comments
It's really not a problem. My first girlfriend was 24, when I was 20. Four year age gap, and it caused no difficulties at all.
actually all my gals have been older. The 'youngest' was 1y older, the oldest 7y.
The last girl of interest was (or still is) 24. Didn't work out, (but not because of age-gap issues) but I haven't wasted a moment thinking if it was out of order, because she's older.
(I'm 21, soon to be 22, btw.)
no. you can't say "most". maybe many, but at least as much won't do that, and maybe some want younger ones and another ones just date those who are exactly as old. And as long as you don't know that person better you can't foretell it at all.
If a girl rules out a guy because of his age, without knowing him, I feel sorry for her. that's narrow headed imho (at least at adulthood, as we are speaking here, I suppose).
go for it, no second thoughts. you will find out soon enuff.
Depends on the age of the girl in question, i would definitely say that younger girls would generally not go for younger guys, but women who are older are more sure in themselves that a guy being younger doesn't necessarily rule him out of being a potential date.
Shouldn't really be an issue, but some girls won't waver from going with older guys. Their loss really.
Nowdays I'm not really bothered about someones age. Would probably only go down to 20 though, I would feel a bit odd going out with a teenager.
No it isnt fair to say that, Im not like it (Im 29, hes 27) , neither are my friends. Ive dated guys mainly youngerbut it hasnt been an conscious decision-when I started going out with this one, I didnt know how old he was!
The reason why women tend to go for older men is because women tend to be more mature at any given age than men. But if you have a connection between you then that really isn't going to matter. It's more about who you are and how you act than the date on your birth certificate.
If your attracted to eachother and click then you wont have any problems with the age gap.
I think probably a lot of it is me, age has always been pretty irrelevant to me. I've been out with people older and younger and apart from the bigger age gaps e.g 10 years i've not really paid a blind bit of attention to it. I've dated people 2 years younger and to be honest i term that as my age.
See with regards to you Matt, 21 and 24 does not make me go shock horror. Maybe it's because where i live age gaps are quite a common thing.
My friend is 29 and has just got married to her 24 yr old partner. I see nothing wrong in this because if you knew them you would see how suited they are and how right it is.
So to the original poster, don't worry about it. If it's meant to be it will, the older you get the more you realise it's about who you're with not the age they are.
What about if there's a really big age gap between to people..woman early 30's and guy 20's??? guy is mature and sensible, head firmly on his shoulders..isnt it about having a connection with someone, they make you happy and you just click.
I'd like to know how people feel on this?