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None of my ex's had that problem..... WTF ?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi guys,

Just wanted to rant a little.

I recentley started to have sex with my new partner and before this I was a virgin.
Due to this is had a hard time cuming for some reason ?.

We usualy have sex for a long time and she has no problem climaxing but no matter what we do I can not cum until I attend to myself.

Unfortunatley this is proving a problem because she feels I wont cum because I do not find her attractive. I keep telling her she does turn me on and she is the most beautifull n sexy woman I have ever met but because I/we have this problem it sometimes crops up and becomes a bit of a problem.

About two nights ago we had sex and again she climaxed 3 times during but I had to take care of myself afterwards.
She did not like it and decided to tell me "None of my other boyfriends had that problem".

Well this kinda hurt me because that made me feel like "hey, thanks for the sex, but why cant you do something simple like those guys could" :mad:

She then asked me if it was her. She recentley has lost a lot of waight and this (in her words) has loosend up her vigina.
I class myself as normal in size and I must admit I usualy do not feel much friction with her during sex and unfortunatley I need a lot of fast friction.

There has been a few times that I have felt like I am nearly there but the rush just fades away and then nothing.

I did not want to have her think negativley of herself in any way so I said the problem is all mine but it just hurts to hear her previouse boyfriends had no problems in that department (even the last guy who apparentley had a small penis). If I can not get much friction, how did that guy cope ?.

She has gone on holiday this week and she has asked me to not do anything to myself to see if anything changes when she gets back. ;)

I have had a few issues regarding my past and hers but to throw me in with her previouse blokes after I took the blame as it where. Well thats just pants :grump:

O.K rant over. :yeees:

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The more you stress, the less likely it is to happen, as you'll be worrying about it more than you'll be having a good time.

    I haven't really suffered with what you describe, but there certainly have been times where I've struggled to "get a grip", but only when the other person has been extremely wet, or after a fairly long session when my tool wasn't quite as excited as it had been earlier, so likely somewhat less "swollen".

    There is a good chance that if you don't relieve yourself, you'll be so frustrated when you do next see her that you'll climax very quickly - which may not please her too much, but it may be a very good thing for you to achieve, and help you get past the worry of not climaxing when with her.

    :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Are you taking any medication? Prozac stopped me from being able to come through sex alone. It's not that unusual.

    You need to be straight: if you thought she was ugly you wouldn't get hard. Your stiffy is the sign of your attraction, not whether you're able to come or not.

    I would suggest that you masturbate less, it might mean that you need less stimulation to come if you haven't had a wank for a week.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for the reply guys.

    Kermit: No I am not on any medication. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    the first time i have had sex with most boys that i've really liked and they've really liked me; neither of us has come.
    i've never really worried about it too much, but i figured it's cos they're nervous about me and i'm nervous about them, and then you just can't quite relax and get in the zone.
    in fact, the more emotionally intense the situation is, the less likely it is the boy will come. or so my experience has been?

    dunno if that helps at all?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    maybe because you were a virgin, youre too used to the hard and fast stimulation of wanking instead of the softer feeling of sex.
    Stop wanking so much and see if that helps
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yea she has been on hoilday this week so I have not done anything to myself just to see if it will make a differance when she gets back.

    Hope it works. :yippe:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    kingzilla wrote: »
    Yea she has been on hoilday this week so I have not done anything to myself just to see if it will make a differance when she gets back.

    Hope it works. :yippe:

    It will.

    Stop finishing yourself off after sex, or you will never adjust to the different sensation of sex. I had the same problem when I started having sex.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    This sounds simliar to me and my bf when we first went out. Neither of us would climax at first. Just keep trying but try not to worry about it. If you worry or if you are stressed it doesnt help matters!
    This sounds like a comman problem with a lot of people so I wouldnt worry about it. It must be frustrating for your gf and you but she should be supportive towards you!
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