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Strange but Great Sex ?.

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi Guys,

I would appriciate your advice please.

I have met a wonderfull, brilliant, beautifull woman and we have been seeing each other for about a month now.

Last night I stayed over at her house and we had sex for the first time. It was awesome and went on for hours. She climaxed a lot but unfortunatley I could not :banghead: I realy wanted to but it just would not happen.

This morning we both woke up at around 6am and made love again and that went on for about a hour,
Again she had no problems but I could not cum even tho I felt the sensation that I wanted to.

Later on the afternoon we tried again and the same results, She climaxed and I could not.

This is the strange part tho........ Before last night I was still a virgin and I always thought virgins did not last very long :confused:

I always like to focus on the possitive side so even tho I am greatfull my first time was with a fantastic woman and the sex was brilliant and I did not cum in my pants before I touched her. I felt like she was worried that I was not turned on by her etc.

She thought the sex was great she was worried that she was doing something wrong etc ?.

We are planning on seeing each other tomorrow night but I realy do not want to go through this again. I want her to feel special etc :)

I am not on any medication or drugs etc, No drink and I dont even smoke etc.

If this continues should I go see a Doctor ?.

Thanks again.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well if this was your first time(s) were you maybe a bit stressed?
    I think most guys would like to have that 'problem' for the first time rather than the more usual opposite one :o

    Not really sure what to suggest, but try and reassure her that you are enjoying it as much as you are, there's plenty more ways to show appreciation than the final act of cumming.

    Just hope she's not hung up on the idea that climax == success at all times. My ex had that ... if I couldn't cum for whatever reason (pretty much if I already had earlier and hadn't "recharged") she got really uptight and thought she wasn't doing something right, despite my protestations to the contrary!!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    the first time i slept with my ex we were both virgins and he had the same problem, but found it easier to cum at first through oral or handjobs. perhaps give that a go while your still getting used to someone else being around at climax, so you're more at ease when you give it another go. also - have u tried having her on top?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yep, We both done oral and she has been on top twice and still nothing ?.

    As for being stressed....... To say it was my first time I was realy cool and up for it....... unfortunatley I just could not do it :chin:

    I dont think there is anything mentaly blocking me ?. She wants to make me cum to return the favour as it where but its just not happening.

    I have read a few simular topics so its good to hear I am not the only one etc but I feel it will make us both feel better if I do.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know it's not the thing to say when you're struggling to figure out why it's happening but ... sometimes I wish I had that problem! Haha.

    Good luck getting it sorted though - I reckon it'll ease up once you two get more comfortable with each other :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ok this will sound bad on my part but I've known guys who had that block because I've wanted to 'make them cum' - in fact I haven't been able to in the past because there feels like to much pressure to perform. I'm sure there's nothing wrong with u, but hell the first time is big and scary with so many levels of expectation I'm not surprised you're struggling in some way.

    Don't expect to cum, just get it off the agenda. Relax and enjoy the sensations and the experiences without worrying about the result, and you'll get there.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for posting guys. :)

    Well I am seeing her again tonight but her friend will be staying over so I probably wont be staying over as well :crying:

    We will have to see what happens :blush:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Souds like you have a mental block - I'd suggest just do some mutual wanking and see if you can get yourself to cum that way - over her tits or face ideally...... :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I am starting to think it is a mental block.
    I did stay over again and it was great sex for both of us but again I could not cum.

    I am staying at her house again tonight so attempt no.4 :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My recent ex-bf had this problem initially, at first I thought I was doing something wrong so make sure your partner understands it has nothing to do with her. We had great sex then he would finish it off himself. Once we were both more comfortable with eachother the issue stopped and didn't return. Just relax & go with it as long as you are both happy :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Guys.

    Well it happend again. A great night of sex and no finarley.

    I think I will have to either talk with her or if it keeps going the same way go see a Doctor etc.

    Charmers, Thanks for the advice.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    let us know what happens post doc x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Guys.

    Well again we have had loads of sex and again she is haveing no probs and I still can not cum with sex.

    Instead I have resorted to just going with the flow. I am having great sex with her and when she has had her fun I end up masterbating while she kisses me etc.

    I figure if the presure to see me cum is out of the way I can relax more for future sex and it will just happen with time.

    I am also just not going to masterbate between sex so I can build up my sperm cells so it hightens my sex drive etc.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    kingzilla wrote: »
    Yep, We both done oral and she has been on top twice and still nothing ?.

    As for being stressed....... To say it was my first time I was realy cool and up for it....... unfortunatley I just could not do it :chin:

    I dont think there is anything mentaly blocking me ?. She wants to make me cum to return the favour as it where but its just not happening.

    I have read a few simular topics so its good to hear I am not the only one etc but I feel it will make us both feel better if I do.
    Could it be that she is fakeing it? or the stimulations you get are not to the fullest to get you ther?

    Just a suggesion.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Na Im shure she isnt fakeing it :D

    As for me I need constant fast friction but can not get it through sex :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ask her to 'take care of you' (oral). so that you can keep on doing that until you orgasm enough times before you try having sex together again?
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