Worst war films

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
We've done best - now how about worst?

The Thin Red Line - pretensious bollocks and anyone everyone knows the thin red line is the British Infantry so adding another reason to burn this film

Courage under fire - frankly I can see why they shot Meg Ryan, though why someone who fucks up so abdly she's topped by her own men gets awarded the US's highest honour is a new one on me; the only obvious reason would be that the film-makers thought it would bring in the chicks in an outbreak of girl power. So not only complete bollocks, but politically correct bollocks as well.

Oh, what a lovely war - as an anti-war film it remains the best recruiting sergeant ever. If they showed it before troops went over the top and said the bastards who made it in were in the trench opposite it'd be twelve VCs before breakfast as everyone strove to bayonent the director... probably in the bollocks that being to kind a fate for this film

The Charge of the Light Brigade - history written by an O'level student who slept through most of the lesson on the Crimean War. Such talented actors wasted on an exercise of class-war bollocks.

How I won the war - proof that John Lennon may have been more important than Jesus but he had lousy taste as a film star. It might have worked for 196)'s drugged out hippies, but show it to a bunch of Northern Irish schoolkids in the 80's was possibly the stupidest mistake a teacher made since Mr Magoo accidently stumbled into the girls changing toom. yep you guessed it - the film is absolute bollocks

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    We Were Soldiers - The only imagery saying the regiment was australian is the badges shown on one scene other than that they are american! The total truth bending bollocks with the good old 3 american pals fending off the hordes of savage commie bastards wears thin after about an hour.
    And the ending.... I remember watching it with this face :eek2: predictable, sappy, garbage.


    Pearl Harbour - What. The. Fuck. So little attention to detail all the way through this film (the scene where they walk past the building with 'Est. 1947' for example) and the last hour was totally stupid and pointless, they can't make a movie where the americans get beaten so they make this bombing raid that ends with.. well i dont know what the hell happened other than Josh Hartnett getting shot. I had pretty much given up on the plot at that point.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh how could I forget Pearl Habour.... Perhaps I have deliberately wiped those few hours of mind-numbing boredom from my mind...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The Thin Red Line is okay. Bit disappointing given the talent involved, but it's not a bad film.

    What about that one about the U-boat. I've never seen it, I just remember everyone whinging about it when it came out.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What about that one about the U-boat. I've never seen it, I just remember everyone whinging about it when it came out.

    Das Boot?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What about that one about the U-boat. I've never seen it, I just remember everyone whinging about it when it came out.

    U-271 - I think this is the one! - they aimed for a Das Boot feel but they failed miserably, the scene where they are switching and they drop the machine 'the enigma!!' the guy shouts and jumps in, totally thrilling action scene.

    The scenes where they get depthcharged also has no tension and the ending is one of the worst ive ever seen in a war movie. Another one of those 'based on a true story' movies where the thing did actually happen but it was not done by americans in reality.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Pearl Harbour - What. The. Fuck. So little attention to detail all the way through this film (the scene where they walk past the building with 'Est. 1947' for example) and the last hour was totally stupid and pointless, they can't make a movie where the americans get beaten so they make this bombing raid that ends with.. well i dont know what the hell happened other than Josh Hartnett getting shot. I had pretty much given up on the plot at that point.

    Yeah it was awful. Not to go too much over the top but its such a shame and quite sad really that they made that bollocks. Could you imagine survivors of Pearl Harbour watching that? They'd think what the hell have you done!

    I may as well add the storyline, as we all know was one big FARCE. Why add all the crap?! WHHHHY!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Although interesting to note that the bombing raid on Japan did actually happen - though it hardly seems real given how it's presented.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doolittle_Raid
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    We Were Soldiers really is terrible in my eyes. Couldn't stand that film.

    I'll have a think on some more, I'm still trying to come up with my 5 favourite TV series :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Talking of really bad war films, how about one patrotic mess and one huge disappointment.

    Green Berets - John Wayne wins the Vietnam war

    Windtalkers - fuck me this was the biggest disappointment I've ever seen. How does the guy who made Bullet in the Head direct this mess? Mr. Woo, you disappoint me sir.
  • Dr PirateDr Pirate Trust me, I'm a doctor Posts: 8,303
    Shaving Ryans Privates.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jim V wrote: »
    Green Berets - John Wayne wins the Vietnam war
    Was he fighting with the Viet Cong?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    U-271 - I think this is the one! - they aimed for a Das Boot feel but they failed miserably, the scene where they are switching and they drop the machine 'the enigma!!' the guy shouts and jumps in, totally thrilling action scene.

    The scenes where they get depthcharged also has no tension and the ending is one of the worst ive ever seen in a war movie. Another one of those 'based on a true story' movies where the thing did actually happen but it was not done by americans in reality.

    I didn't think it was that bad - okay it's not brilliant but no where near dire enough to make it onto the worst list.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jim V wrote: »
    I'll have a think on some more, I'm still trying to come up with my 5 favourite TV series :p

    And hurry up about that - I posted the entire topic for you ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i actually really like Pearl Harbour.

    Agree with Windtalkers being shit, other shite include tears of the sun, black hawk down...

    i like war films though :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    For me The Worst war Movie is "The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor"
    This is the most Disappointed Movie which I ever seen.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The patriot :( so disapointing, we've had modern war movies but however i'd say it was a war movie and it was so CRAP, Mel "jew hating" Gibson winning the war of independance all by himself and revenging his sons death,
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The patriot is the worst war movie.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What happened to Gibson, he made some good films in his day before he became a jew hating nazi :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jim V wrote: »
    We Were Soldiers really is terrible in my eyes. Couldn't stand that film.

    I'll have a think on some more, I'm still trying to come up with my 5 favourite TV series :p

    I liked we were soldiers :S
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