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boyfriend talking dirty to a female friend
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I know this is wrong and have never done this before but I felt that my boyfriend was hiding things from me, I found his saved messages on msn talking to a female friend that he's known for years. They fell out of contact when we started dating but they are back in contact.
In the saved messages he was talking to her about our sex life and this has nothing to do with her and then he was saying to her how he'd want a blowjob from her. I know this is disgusting sorry....
I've been with my boyfriend for 3years, should I worry about this or is it flirting and banter that i shouldn't know about. He loves me and is happy with me and we are great together. I'm just so confused why he would say this to her!! Please help, and advice i appreciate
In the saved messages he was talking to her about our sex life and this has nothing to do with her and then he was saying to her how he'd want a blowjob from her. I know this is disgusting sorry....
I've been with my boyfriend for 3years, should I worry about this or is it flirting and banter that i shouldn't know about. He loves me and is happy with me and we are great together. I'm just so confused why he would say this to her!! Please help, and advice i appreciate
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Comments
I'm not sure about this. On the one hand, it's not worth admitting to going behind his back over something that might be relatively minor, that nothing is going to come of. On the other hand, I'd be concerned if she was an ex-girlfriend, or a friend who he had feelings for in the past but nothing happened for whatever reason. I don't know about other people, but I wouldn't say those sorts of things to someone who's just a female friend. But I know nothing about the relationship between him and her. They might just have a wierd sense of humour.
I guess it comes down to whether you think there's enough in it that you don't mind admitting snooping. Because admitting snooping on something that turns out to be innocent could be damaging. But so could leaving something that is causing you not to trust him.
I go over to my friends' house. His wife answers the door, with him standing next to her. We exchange our usual hello nonsense, and I ask how she is. "3 months pregnant!" is the answer. I smile, and congratulate them both. I put my hand out to shake my friends' hand, but swiftly retract when he puts his hand out. I look ever so worried, turn to his wife, and say "Is it mine?"
Inappropriate and wrong? Most likely... but my friends and I all know what each other is like. We're all different, at the end of the day.
By the way, my case wasn't helped when his daughter kept referring to me as Daddy every time I went over...
ETA - sex lives... some people are open, some aren't. Whilst we're all different, it is wrong to act in a way contrary to the wishes of your partner, so that side of things isn't really right IMO.
I think you need trust in a relationship so you need to talk to him about any concerns you might have.
I think as long as he doesn't meet up with her or you recognize a strong decline in your relationship/sex life etc. stop snooping in his private stuff, because that puts a lot of strain to the relationship if it comes out and makes your stupid out of jealousy, because you say to yourself, "All I have to do is have a look and I know what's going on."
My sister-in-law went through a phase of always joking about blowjobs whenever I saw her, but she wasn't exactly going to go for a slice of cheesecake...
Talk to him n get some sense into him, if not..be on ur bike
I woudnt go as far as "be on your bike", but yeah, you need to talk to him. Everyones advice is great! I think if i saw my boyfriend sending a text like that, i would be extremely paranoid! It really depends on the type of person he is, is he a flirtatious person? It could just be a personal joke between them.
Dont let your mind run away with you untill you have all the information