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is there help for me?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
:banghead:
ok here goes, Back in November i had a bloke phone me and threaten to kill me and my family.Reported this to police.Long n short is he got a warning under the protection of harassment act.(Not the first time he has done this to me,reported to police that time too but nothing happened).After reading on various site about this ( nothing better to do all day...petrified of leaving the house.) it seems that this means nothing,merely a slap on wrist and told naughty boy dont do it again.Meanwhile he gets on with his life, mine has come to a stop.


So now the hard part:

This chap is a cabbie and has to have crb checks done.What will this mean?Does he have to tell the council that he has this warning?or does it get brushed under the carpet?
i do know if they get points on their driving license they must tell them, as they do if they have an accident. But i can find aything where it says they have to inform anybody of this.
:( Personally i hope he suffers.cos he will never know the damage his little antics have caused to my kids and me.
Thanks for listening( well reading !!:razz: )my problem and thank you for any responses good or bad that i get.

Comments

  • SkiveSkive No discipline. No morality. No respect. New ForestPosts: 15,121 Skive's The Limit
    It sounds like you want to go out your way to make sure he loses his job.

    If your still being harassed go to the police again. Going out you way to piss somebdoy off that's already threatened you seems rather silly to me. That's a harassment too and would make you no better than him.
    Yesterday is history
    Tomorrow is a mystery
    But today is a gift
    That’s why it’s call the present
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for that,
    perhaps you would be happy if your wife / kids or mum had very graphic threats to kill them .

    As for him losing his job ,im not the one that started this , nor did i deserve it.
    But i wont be responsible for his actions ,as i dont see why when all i done was answered MY home phone .

    I have always been taught in life that you take responsability for YOUR OWN actions,
    i did ask him to ring me, threaten me, torture me and make me a nervous wreck that i now cant leave my house on my own .
    SO REALLY IM NOT FUSSED IF A JOB IS ALL HE LOSES AS HE MADE THAT CHOICE NOT ME .

    Sorry for my tone but, he is not the victim in this . He instigated it. so him losing something cos of his actions would be my fault ??? How ???
    in this there are 2 parties , 1 inocent and 1 guilty, not 2 inocent parties, or have i missed something here?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Kaz,

    I don't think Skive is trying to be dismissive of what you've experienced, or implying that someone who has done something horrible shouldn't have to pay for what they have done.

    It's just that he may be looking at it from the point of view of what would make your situation better in the future. maybe it would help if we understood if he is still making these threats?

    After all if he lost his job would it change how you feel about being able to leave the house. Skive was probably thinking that if he did he could start threatening you again and that would be terrible.

    When you reported this to the police did they offer you any support through Victim Support to deal with the aftermath of what happened?

    Assuming you are in England or Wales you can find the contact details for the here -
    http://www.victimsupport.org.uk/vs_england_wales/index.php

    Or if you are in Scotland, Northern Ireland or the Republic here -
    http://www.victimsupport.org.uk/

    Not only would they hopefully be able to help you get back to your life before this happened then can probably help explain the ramifications of his warning.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks jim , and im sorry if i ripped skive head off a bit but i was simlpy asking advice on this warning. Having said that, we have the what if situation where ,What if he does this to some eldery person who takes to long getting in or out of his car, or some youngster thats short of the fare.
    As for is he still threatening me ...answer is no BUT that hasnt stopped me worrying when the kids go to school , or the kids go out, or if he door goes when it dark, or when the phone rings.
    Lets be honest i dont care bout his job one way or other BUT if i can stop someone else losing their life as they know it ,then so be it.
    Again im sorry for the tone earier im not a nasty person but he has taken everything i ever loved about life away.
  • SkiveSkive No discipline. No morality. No respect. New ForestPosts: 15,121 Skive's The Limit
    Thanks Jim, maybe I was too brief.

    You say he isn't harassing you at the moment. I can't see any benifit from getting doing something that's only going to provoke him. Not only that but the police will take you less seriously if they know you've gone out your way to upset him.

    It's not your job to go after him, that's for the police to do, and if he does anything that does warrant him losing his job a CRB check will pick that up.

    I know your the victim in this but you asked for advice and my advice would be to not get any more invlolved with this person than you have to.
    Yesterday is history
    Tomorrow is a mystery
    But today is a gift
    That’s why it’s call the present
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    A harassment warning may sound like a slap on the wrist but it does mean that if the problems continue he can be arrested.

    Going to his place of work and informing on him is going to make it very difficult for you to convinve anyone you really are a victim, and what do you think might happen if he finds out what you've done......?

    My advice is to stay well away, let him come to you and get arrested if he's that desperate.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hi there,


    Firstly, I would like to say sorry to hear your plight.


    I just wondered why he has phoned you...did you give him your number. CRB's is where the company you work for has to find out from the police if you have committed any offences that would jeopardise your job.

    Is there any reason why you gave him this number? Contact the victim support team they could possibly be able to help you?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh and is there any way of you changing your phone....has he called you on your mobile or landline?

    If he commits the offence again he would be arrested I would have thought. I should well imagine you are scared, carry on talking to us to if that helps?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    many thanks

    thanks all , he phoned on both my land line and my mobile .
    to be honest if there was a flight to mars tomorrow i would be the first in the rocket!!! as long as he werent booked on it to.
    I keep myself to myself and i dont go looking for trouble believe me.
    Its not down to me what happens to him i know that but was just asking how this was gonna effect his life.
    Thanks again for the trouble of taking the time to advise or comment ,i know what your all saying (just wish i could forget this happened too) they are helpfull . Againmany thanks for help and support

    xxxxx
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