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Is there something 'wrong' with me?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I can't really explain what they are or what causes them but every now and then I have quite explosive 'breakdowns'. I don't know if they actually are breakdowns but I can't think how else to describe them. I don't even really know what happens when I have them, it's like I regress to some sort of primal state and I lose my memory of what I'm doing. I had one of these on Sat night/Sun morning and it really wasn't pretty. I know things from what I do remember and what my friends have told me. I've no idea what the hell triggered it but after hitting my other half several times I ended up on the floor of the uni car park for at least 5 minutes screaming my head off. Apparently I would have weird unconnected moments of complete clarity and rationality every 30-40 seconds. I was taken home. I thought I was ok, we all did. I should've learnt by now that one of these little episodes is actually a couple of episodes joined together. I wound up trying to smash a wine bottle to stab my OH, ran down the corridor to ask my flatmates to help me. They just had a go at me so I ran out of the building and ended up curling up on the pavement by a main in just my PJs. I'm fairly certain that if a group of clubbers hadn't been returning at that point and kindly escorted me back I probably wouldn't be sitting here posting this now.
I'm no expert in such matters but I don't really think this is in anyway normal...some strangers who were helping my friends in the car park gave my OH the number for a hospital in the city but he forgot to give it to me and I'm at complete loss as to what to do/who to turn to etc.
Sorry this is long and confused, but does anybody have any ideas?
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I'm no expert in such matters but I don't really think this is in anyway normal...some strangers who were helping my friends in the car park gave my OH the number for a hospital in the city but he forgot to give it to me and I'm at complete loss as to what to do/who to turn to etc.
Sorry this is long and confused, but does anybody have any ideas?
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Comments
But yeah, cheers for that. I know a friend of mine would come with me if I asked but I don't know how practical it would be for people to come with me...
I'm so tempted to go on a defensive rant but I know it's silly. Most of the time I'm perfectly safe, I'm generally described as docile and gentle, it just seems to be these odd moments or whatever else we want to call them.
medication, such as benzodiazepines, can help with this
i would definitely advise you to see your GP
It might be worth having a read up on it. Hope you find out whats wrong and get better soon!
hope you get on all right at the GP
The doctor also gave me a leaflet on anger and said to come back next week, so we will see what she says then. She couldn't give me a proper diagnosis as my appointment had originally been about my random bleeding and I thought I'd bring up what happened seeing as she is my doctor.
She doesn't think it's depression, but if I'm honest, I know I have a habit of understating things when people ask me things about my emotions and mental health.
Thanks all, I will let you know if anybody works out what's going on!
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