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eeeep ithinkilikemyteacher!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
things have been running really smoothly for ages now, until out of *nowhere* this massive crush on my english teacher has appeared. i'm not going to do the 'he's amazing and i love him' schpiel, because i'm not 13, but this has really messed my heart up quite badly!
it would actually be fun if i didn't have a boyfriend, BUT now i've started becoming distant from my boyfriend, and it's like i don't care if i see him or not! i havn't seen had much contact with him for a week or so, because we're in the middle of exams, and i really don't care that much, the whole issue of trying to have a relationship at uni keeps popping into my mind and ARGH! i yearn for the simple times of a few weeks ago when the worst thing that happened was a dodgy haircut! how can things become so confusing so fast?? i don't even find my boyfriend that attractive, now that mr.english teacher is on the scene, all i want to do is jump on him :banghead:
please tell me that you've had crushes before, and that it goes away and turns out the teacher isn't actually as great as you thought they were?
it would actually be fun if i didn't have a boyfriend, BUT now i've started becoming distant from my boyfriend, and it's like i don't care if i see him or not! i havn't seen had much contact with him for a week or so, because we're in the middle of exams, and i really don't care that much, the whole issue of trying to have a relationship at uni keeps popping into my mind and ARGH! i yearn for the simple times of a few weeks ago when the worst thing that happened was a dodgy haircut! how can things become so confusing so fast?? i don't even find my boyfriend that attractive, now that mr.english teacher is on the scene, all i want to do is jump on him :banghead:
please tell me that you've had crushes before, and that it goes away and turns out the teacher isn't actually as great as you thought they were?
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Comments
This is a teacher-crush, and pretty normal for young people. Have the feelings that you have but I'd advice you to not let it cloud your judgement and relationship to the boyfriend, as you might regret that.
Also you have to realize that you're dealing with your teacher here. Teachers/lecturers/academic staff cannot and should not get into relationships with their students, unless we're talking about a very mature student, not far from his/her own age. Many institutions have an ethos that such relationships are not "appropriate" and some do even forbid it formally.
Crushes aside, hun, you would put this man in a position where he could lose his job, his reputation and even go to prison if anything was to happen - so he won't let it happen.
He's just one of those people that will be out of your reach. I come across those sorts every day.
It's fun to have a smile about it inside but don't even consider following through. At best, it will break your heart.
It felt like, I couldn't bare to be away from him but when I was with him I was afraid to do anything. It really screwed me up, because it all happened when I had very bad depression and anxiety.
Anyway, now I've left i don't think about him that much, i saw a different side to him at exhibition openings, etc and i didn't like it. If i see him now i smile but generally don't talk because i screwed things up so much, i'm embarressed to say anything, and disappointed in knowing who he is. (i know that sounds harsh)
My advice to you is to not let this person know how you feel. Unless its like a rom.com.movie and the romance is from both sides and all that! letting this person know how you feel may make things worse and cause an awkwardness.
If you want to talk about it, send me a private message. i don't mind. x
another piece of advice i read was to replace this obsession with another one, i choose shopping wish me luck
Good luck!
You may also want to take a look at TheSite.org's article on coping with crushes if you get a chance.
Your posts are really insightful, and I may be wrong but it strikes me that this crush has appeared partly as a distraction from some of the issues that are on the horizon with your current boyfriend? As others have said, this attraction is bound to fade, and when that happens you may well find that you're looking for another distraction elsewhere because you still can't face talking to your lad about how things might turn out when you go to uni.
It may be that if you're able to have some of these conversations with your boyfriend now, then you will feel much better about EVERYTHING and start to get excited about the new term and all it's possibilities. On the one hand, talking about it may help you to become closer, and if not, then at least you will have confronted the situation and hopefully feel able to make some healthy decisions.
Take care - and keep posting.
having a crush on someone this unattainable is an absolute killer, i left school yesterday and i'm so so miserable and a) not being a sixth former anymore and b) waking up and not knowing how to fill the day c) not being able to see the teacher that i have the crush on.
one of my friends is going back into school next week, and everytime i think about it, i have this massive stab of jealousy that she gets the opportunity to see him.
and of course, while all this is going on, i'm still ignoring my boyfriend! i'm going to try and talk to him today about why i'm being so distant, leaving school really has torn me up and all i want to do is be by myself
gonna get dressed and go for a walk to clear my head, i hate not having something to do every day, i should be glad that i've got all of this free time, but i'd rather go back to school, i don't like it!!!!!!
in the post this morning i got a letter about my driving test and one from the college i'm going to next year - i suppose it's a sign that i should be thinking about the future eh?
I would say yes, those things are signs. they are certainly something to concentrate on.
I think what Helen said is right, you are avoiding a situation by obsessing about this teacher...
let us know how you get on with your boyfriend.
"guess who i saw today! ... mr.****!!"
GAH
the other night my best friend's boyfriend tried to kiss me when he was drunk, and obviously my boyfriend was furious, and he feels sick and angry about it. i talked to him about if he doesnt trust "other people" around me, how are we going to cope at uni? but we didn't come to any kind of decision. i got out of the car, kind of hoping that this would be an easy way out of the relationship and i could spend my time pursuing this crush!! obviously woke up in the morning and felt guilty that i'd been so selfish, and so harsh to my boyfriend who i once obsessed over similarly and who was clearly torn up about it.
gah