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Friendships are made after getting to know those who first contact you, and trust is built up. But it takes time in getting to know people on your friend's list so don't be too hasty in booting them off.
It might surprise you but the "arsehole" you knew at school might have turned out good, so don't judge them. Give them a chance.
Facebook I don't belong to but Myspace I do but rarely use it now because people I made friends with don't reply back. I shall be deleting the board soon.
Love Poppi
I have set my privacy settings on facebook so that my friends can't see much of my activity, because I want to be able to join groups etc. without everyone seeing which ones I have joined.
These people may have secrets they just don't want you or their real friends to know, so perhaps they have removed you. I'm surprised you can see what they have done in their profiles if they have not added you, because I thought privacy settings generally prevented you from seeing these things.
And you can still send them messages even if you are not their friend unless they actually block you. Have any of them actually done that?