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Inappropriate birthday present
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
OK... My girlfriend receveid a birthday present from one of her male freinds the other day, turned out it was some porn and a rampant rabbit (also included a slightly inappropriate card).
I was a bit annoyed with this, and told her so. She said it was just a joke and that he does it every year, but could see where I was coming from. I didn't say that I think he should stop, I just said I wanted her to know I wasn't happy with it.
Thinking about it more though, I am really unhappy with it, and I think he's overstepped a line. I want to tell her that I think he should stop doing this and she should have a word with him, but of course now i'm not sure if i'm over-reacting.
I'd like to know what you guys think. Is this inappropriate? Am I right to be a bit pissed and want her to tell him to stop doing it, or am I over-reacting to the whole thing? also, seeing as we've already gone through the whole situation, is it wise to bring it back up again? Should I just leave it be, even though i'm not happy with how it ended?
Thanks!
I was a bit annoyed with this, and told her so. She said it was just a joke and that he does it every year, but could see where I was coming from. I didn't say that I think he should stop, I just said I wanted her to know I wasn't happy with it.
Thinking about it more though, I am really unhappy with it, and I think he's overstepped a line. I want to tell her that I think he should stop doing this and she should have a word with him, but of course now i'm not sure if i'm over-reacting.
I'd like to know what you guys think. Is this inappropriate? Am I right to be a bit pissed and want her to tell him to stop doing it, or am I over-reacting to the whole thing? also, seeing as we've already gone through the whole situation, is it wise to bring it back up again? Should I just leave it be, even though i'm not happy with how it ended?
Thanks!
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Comments
if it ISNT that sort of freindship id say she might be a bit naieve
From what I've gathered there's nothing going on between them and he's just a good friend. I'm not particularly worried about there being a meaning behind the presents, I just thought they were inappropriate.
I guess that she does kind of see him as that kind of friend though, sort of 'one of the girls' (ironically she has very few female friends, they're pretty much all male).
Doesn't sound too far from sort fo stuff i've got my two best mates for their birthdays before.
If it was just this time I think it'd be easier to just laugh off and accept, but I know this is going to happen every year, and piss me off every year. I wasn't sure if it was better to say, 'ok that's funny, but stop doing it from now on'.
I don't think the big green eyed monster routine would go down very well really. If it's always been like this then why worry about it?
You could have some fun together with it.
I'd be chuffed with a sex toy for my birthday
I see what you're saying .. maybe you could play along and for his birthday get him something kinky as a joke?
I'm sure I actually bought 1983 something smutty one Xmas actually :chin:
I might not buy it for somebody with a boyfriend though.
I mean obviously in reality you cant stop anyone, partner or not, doing anything they want to,sleeping around if they want, noones got the right to impose themselves on anyone "really", but in reality, in a relationship its a bit different.
Likewise, even if I had a male friend who i was all flirty with, if they got a partner, theres some things you just totally tone down, otherwise their partner ends up hating you, unsurprisingly
No. I'd probably feel the same.
:no: Id find it totally inappropriate, I'm surprised that so many people don't
For what its worth, I think the friend probably did overstep the mark (I'd be weirded if any of her friends bought her a dildo), but I'm more interested in your reaction of complete anger and rage. If a girl had bought it then I don't think you'd be angry. That shows a certain amount of insecurity on your part, really you kinda need to work out what you're worried about.
I don't think it's insecurity, I doubt there's any fella in the world who wouldn't freak out if their girlfriends male friend bought them a dildo and gave an inappropriate letter for their birthday.
What on earth are you on about? There was no anger and rage. He's expressed that he's not happy about it and should he say anything. Where did the anger and rage come into it??? :eek2:
I would be really weireded out if my female riends bought it for me - and i'm a girl - but then i dont' really have that sort of relationship with my female friends - let alone my male ones - I would be seriously weirded out and i think that my husband would justifiably go completely mental.