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No thought was put into this...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru


  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It sounds more like a case that you're hoping that if you get with this girl she'll become your life and as such, her lifestyle will become yours and so you'll get what you really crave through it, rather than you really want to be with her instead of your gf.

    You're still very young and most of the things you crave people start to do when they go off to university and live away from parents for the first time. I wouldn't worry too much about it now. Perhaps you could try joining some clubs, which will get you out and about more and meeting new people who through being in the same club obviously have things in common with you.

    Life's what you make of it...if you get an invite out, even if it doesn't sound like something you think you'll enjoy, you should accept it...those nights are generally the ones that shock you and turn out really good.

    What sort of things do you and your g/f get up to...could you start going places together and maybe being a support for each other to help meet new people if you're shy of doing it alone.

    Plenty of people like playing computer games and things, so I seriously doubt that there's nothing you have in common with people in your class...rather you just haven't spoken enough to find out...try to make an effort to talk to someone different each lesson you have and see if you can start getting to know more about there lives and find the things in common...I think you'll be surprised.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That other girl is no solution to what you are feeling.

    You need to reduce the time you spend playing games and 'all the sad stuff' and go out, meet people and do different things. You have a girlfriend already so that's an excellent start, you can ask her out to different places and do this and that together. If she has friends you could perhaps hang with them (and hopefully there'll be some blokes).

    I killed a few years of my life by hanging online day in day out. These are years I will never get back. The sooner you step away from the computer the better. Sure it's fun while it lasts, but it isn't as great when it's the only thing you can think of having done when you look back. It also gave me zero stuff to talk about when I was faced with people.

    Maybe you could look into getting a job where you can work a few hours a week preferably around people? It'll zap away some computer hours, earn you some extra cash and put you out among people where you can possibly make new friends.

    Chasing some random girl who seems to have an exciting life or whatever will not help you achieve anything. You need to look at yourself and who you want to be and change YOU, a new chick sure as hell won't re-define you.
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