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Worried about my girlfriend

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
This is my first post, but decided if someone could help.
I met this girl 2 months ago, she's cute, shy really good looking, but really skinny. I'm also quite underweight. (which I don't mind)
However she's a nympho, no problem with that, but she'll go until she passes out or have to get up to go to work, then I'm tired out all day-it's worrying me as she never eats and demands hard sex all the time. Her tiny frame is so skinny that all her ribs stick out and it hurts her when we make love. I like her, but it's tiring me out and she's loosing weight even more we have sex. Not only that, she wants to be on top all the time and do the most work. She wants to model, but so far she is waiting for more agency work. I think that's what's troubling her.
Help, please

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well... sex can burn of 400kcals a time ;)
    seriously tho. talk to her about it
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You could suggest eating chocolate sauce or whipped cream off her and her off you next time if she doesnt respond well with talking about it. This could also be a way for her to open up to you about why she doesn't want to eat.
    If she says stops talking to you just say that you were using it as a sexual thing and you can bring up her eating problems in a different venue as sexual sitations arent exactly the best place to bring up things which you are sensitive about
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Won't that make her more insecure? If I thought my eating problems were going to stop me doing something for my partner I'd just beat myself up even more.

    There's usually more to an eating disorder than just trying to con someone into eating more calories.

    I'd suggest you talk to her. It sounds like there's a problem. Does she talk about her weight a lot?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah sorry i worded it wrong, i meant the turn on thing to be a way to stop the conversation if it makes her uncomfortable.

    when i was 13-15 and then occassionaly through my later teens i had a quite serious eating disorder which stemmed from watching my cousin (who is very close to my family) become a fairly successful ballerina and trying to be like her. I eventually lost ALOT of weight and my mother had to con me into eating for me to survive, obviously not ideal in the long run of course
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Maybe she's using sex as her obsessive exercise outlet, if she has an eating disorder as you obviously suspect this often goes hand in hand.
    Try talking to her about it, explain how concerned you are.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Silk wrote: »
    Maybe she's using sex as her obsessive exercise outlet, if she has an eating disorder as you obviously suspect this often goes hand in hand.
    Try talking to her about it, explain how concerned you are.

    Could'nt say it better myself.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've tried to persuade her, but we're both active and when she wakes up, does 1/2 hour of aerobics in the morning. Also we are both veggie's (her idea) and is under pressure from her work colleagues to keep thin (Fashon clothes shop) and part-time at Somerfield's; working with food puts her off her appetite, I'd say. She's not dangerously thin, but not far off. I'd say she's fit-thin, not dead thin. I don't want to make it worse telling her off, but I will try Piccolo's approach, but very subtle... :confused:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Whilst I'm giving uncharacteristically helpful advice...

    Don't go in there like a bull in a china shop, you're right. If you don't mind, I'll just repeat something from my own experience.

    My girlfriend took me aside this afternoon and said she knows I've been self-harming, she knows my eating disorder makes me overweight and she loves me anyway. No pressure but it let me know it affects her. Not in a guilty way, and she didn't ask me to do anything; she just wanted to have said it. And I felt better afterwards.

    If she hasn't confided in you yet, that approach may not work but whatever you say, try to remain positive. You can't force her to seek help and trying to may damage your relationship. Her decisions might be stupid but they are hers to make and sometimes the best thing you can do is be there to pick up the pieces.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    More gf woes

    I've decided to let my girlfriend do as she pleases. A friend said if she can handle sex well, then she's not too bad. I know she's all skin and bone, but she is fit, so that can't be too bad. When I put my ear to her small stomach I can hear that she's not eaten anything for days and her tiny body is starving badly, but she just won't eat hardly anything.
    I did tell her that I want to be ontop more and this has seemed to work for us and we enjoy ourselves, even though her drive knackers me some.
    On this I do worry is that when we go out, she wears skimpy clothes. Okay she's practically supermodel skinny, but last time wore small skirt and a bra and it was freezing! I felt cold, imagine her! Not only that she left her next layer of clothes left at home, so there was no chickening out and didn't want my jacket...
    Maybe I can get some mince pies down her...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't think you're right to ignore the problem, that's not what I would call helpful. You aren't going to "get some mince pies down her" but gently encouraging her to get help wouldn't go amiss.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Guess what? She just had a Mince Pie today, albiet the Gluten Free variety. If I nag her, she has slapped me before and once gave me a black eye. Nice. I'd reckon she's looks like Jasline Rodriguez, but has a temper like Miss Piggy - ouch!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey

    Leave this too much worry and go naturally as things went .......

    "Destiny is not a matter of chance but destiny is matter of choice"
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