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How come
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
soo many girls find perfect boyfriends who treat them right, fall in love with them, would do anything for them etc. && i've never met any guy like that in my life.
i don't know where i'm going wrong but guys will just make me fall for them when there not interested, use me and thats all i'm good for
no one has ever loved me like soo many guys love their girlfriends.
how do you get guys to fall for you?!?
i don't know where i'm going wrong but guys will just make me fall for them when there not interested, use me and thats all i'm good for
no one has ever loved me like soo many guys love their girlfriends.
how do you get guys to fall for you?!?
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if you make it clear from the start that you will put up with any bad behaviour and still be grovelling at their feet for love, then men will treat you as a pathetic puppy. It's all about confidence, really, to know when to tell a twat to fuck off, and to appreciate it when someone good comes along.
Too many young women love a bad boy because it gives them drama in their life; bad boys who know they can get away with it will never make a good husband.
if you find out, can you tell me? cos Kermit's way isn't working so good. I'm not saying its wrong, its just in my personal experience ineffective
If you try and be someone else then you will never get to meet the right person.
If you are yourself then you might well meet the right person, but it can take an awful long time to do it.
I think people put too much stall in finding Mr/Mrs/Ms Right at the first attempt; it rarely ever happens.
I'm lucky; I have a wife who I love and who loves me. But if we'd met six months before we did, I don't think we'd have had any relationship at all because we would have been too different. Luck and timing are pretty important too.
exactly. I had two long term relationships including a marriage before i actually met mr Right.
You need to have a clear idea of exactly what you want from life and from a relationship, and not waste your time with people you know aren't going to give you that. Like I know I want to get married and have babies, and so I've never been in a relationship with a guy who didn't want that for himself also at some point in the future.
But yeah I think way too much time is spent nowdays messing around and playing games, girls go for guys that are completely wrong for them in every way and then seem totally surprised when it doesn't work out, and there is so much "interpretation of text messages" and people not being honest with how they feel from the beginning, I think it can be really difficult!
And ultimately as well as Kermit said, it is about two people being right for one another at the right time.
no offense, but someone had to say it. I guess a part of girls who rejected me, thought I'm butt ugly. Not a whole lot you can change about that however. maybe lose a few pounds, those weird glasses, or a small change in fashion can change a bit, but in the end you have to find someone who puts up with your mug.
You can't.
Kermit makes some good points about being yourself and not trying to pretend to be something you're not.
5 months after i split up with my ex i met a lovely guy, he actually talks to me and treats me like a princess, takes me for meals and to the cinema and lots of other nice things, we have been together nearly 7 months now and things are going really well and i actually could see myself spending the rest of my life with him
The best thing to do is to not actually think about it, you have to let things happen for themselves.............there isnt any rush so just enjoy kissing all the frogs until you find your prince hehe
I just wanted to say that I think everyone who has mentioned 'being yourself' has really hit the nail on the head. The most important thing is that you are happy, regardless of whether you have someone 'special' in your life or not. Concentrate on yourself and being free to do the things you enjoy. If you're happy in your own skin, I'm sure someone will turn up when you least expect it. They'll be attracted to your confidence and the fact that you don't need someone, but you're with them because you want to be.
Take your time, there's no rush to find your perfect partner. I'm sure you must be sick to death of the old cliches, but I there is so much truth in the idea that you'll only 'find' your Mr Right when you stop looking
Good luck!
S x
out of interest - did you never feel like you could spend the rest of your life with the guy you met at 17?
I just left a man I was at one time deeply in love with, I now have a new man who if he asked me to marry him I would say yes to despite never being the marrying kind. Even though I had some good times with the ex it was clearly going nowhere and I knew this for a very long time. I feel completely different about the new man, but I try not to let it negate the good times I did have with the ex.
Anyway - perhaps what I am saying is that it's very rare to find the man of your dreams straight away, and even that sometimes the man of your dreams may one day no longer be the man of your dreams. Perhaps the people you see around you may look like they are perfectly hapy all the time, but I bet it takes some effort sometimes
Then it just happens... or sometimes it doesn't. There's no formula, sad to say.
To coin a cheesy one... "you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince." I sure as hell did
The first thing that I think is important is never to let yourself think that you're not good enough for your guy (or, indeed, girl). I've made this mistake myself. I've allowed myself to be convinced that my girlfriend was too good for me - so when she went out and cheated on me, or went into massive stroppy moods every time something didn't suit her, it was okay because I didn't think I was enough for her. This is 100% bullshit. She was using me to provide her with an element of stability and something to go back to after she had all the fun she wanted. It made me miserable and eventually I just didn't want to put up with it anymore.
The second thing I want to say is the key to finding a happy relationship is to be happy outside of a relationship. When I was depressed I found myself jumping from person to person like a rabbit. I was miserable when I was alone - but I was miserable in a relationship too, because there was something missing. I thought it was romance and that a girlfriend could solve it. I was wrong - the thing that was missing was the ability to be happy on my own. I've come to the conclusion that relationships enhance the mood with which you enter them. You go into them self-conscious and unhappy, they only seem to make it worse. You go into them being okay with yourself, they make you more okay with yourself.
My final point is that I see no reason to settle. I've gone through a period of substituting on an aspect of the person I was seeing because I just wanted to be seeing someone - anyone. Bad move. If someone's got something about you that you don't like/annoys you - don't even think about it. You won't be able to just put up with it, because if it annoys you before a relationship... And you sure as hell won't be able to change them.
So really, my key tips are - be happy with who you are, because if you want love you need someone to love you. If you don't love you, how the hell is anyone else supposed to? Secondly, don't settle for second best. Know what you want and if someone doesn't match up - they're not for you, move on. Thirdly - don't let anyone treat you like crap for the sake of staying in a relationship with someone you think is right. If they don't respect you, they are certainly not what you're looking for.
Good luck!
desperate people are off putting tho, so dont get too desperate