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Two girls
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I've never had this issue before, so apologies if it seems trivial.
I started dating girl #1 a few weeks ago, we've been out three times, and really do get on and have a great time. She's away at the moment but back in a week, so hopefully we'll meet up again then.
Girl #2 was someone I was going to meet before girl #1, but she decided not to and got with someone else. Now girl #2 is available again, and contacted me out of the blue at the weekend, and I find myself arranging to meet her tonight at mine (although she doesn't know where that is).
Laugh if you wish
but I sound like a right cheat, and I never thought I was that sort of guy. Okay, so with the first girl it hasn't got serious, but we both want to see more of each other, yet I'm also tempted by the offer from the second girl. I guess I thought I was better than that.
Of course, i could still back out of it, but I dont think I want to. But it's also unfair to practically cheat, so aside from cutting my balls off, I don't know what to do.
I started dating girl #1 a few weeks ago, we've been out three times, and really do get on and have a great time. She's away at the moment but back in a week, so hopefully we'll meet up again then.
Girl #2 was someone I was going to meet before girl #1, but she decided not to and got with someone else. Now girl #2 is available again, and contacted me out of the blue at the weekend, and I find myself arranging to meet her tonight at mine (although she doesn't know where that is).
Laugh if you wish
but I sound like a right cheat, and I never thought I was that sort of guy. Okay, so with the first girl it hasn't got serious, but we both want to see more of each other, yet I'm also tempted by the offer from the second girl. I guess I thought I was better than that.Of course, i could still back out of it, but I dont think I want to. But it's also unfair to practically cheat, so aside from cutting my balls off, I don't know what to do.
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Comments
I don't think you should meet girl number 2. It sounds to me like you are kind of "second best" to her...I don't know anything about your situation but if a guy had turned me down because he got a better offer and then came back when that didn't work out - and in the meantime I'd met and dated someone I really liked and wanted to see more of - I'd be quite happy to tell the first bloke "sorry, but you missed your chance".
This is what I don't understand - if I am second best, which by the looks of it I am, why am I interested in seeing her, especially given that the first girl I'm dating is really nice and everything, and I can be myself with her.
I just don't really understand why I am even considering seeing the second girl - I don't expect to get an answer from here, I'm just confused to be honest.
if you're happy atm with girl #1 - why jepodize it?
Absolutely right. Except that girl #1 earlier, out of the blue, has turned round and said that she doesn't think she's over her ex, that it's unfair to keep seeing me when she feels like this blah blah.
Up until that point, I had decided to give #2 a miss. I'm still thinking of giving it a miss, but more delaying it - but then I don't want to mess #2 around, in pretty much the fashion that it appears I'm about to be messed around by #1 unless I put a stop to it.
And there was me moaning about being single the other week :yippe:
but if #1 isn't over her ex... she sees you as 2nd best.
from what you said at the beginning girl #2 doesn't see you as 2nd best... just took up a different opportunity which led to her getting another bf but is now single again...
Never mind. Think I'll stick to taking it easy for a while
Well, I made a huge mistake last night and did something for the first time (don't worry, precautions were taken!). Kinda wishing I hadn't now :crying: Guess I'll just learn from it all.
:no:
Girl #2 is ready for a relationship, but after last night, I don't think I want to be with her. That sounds horrible I know, but at the time it seemed okay, but now looking back I regret it.
To be honest, right now I just want to be away from it all. I'm seriously such a twat for throwing everything away in one night.
What have you thrown away?
In my view, if you've only been on a few dates with someone, and haven't spoke about being exclusive, it's fair game really... A lot of people see a few people (but keep it quiet), then after a few weeks/months, stick with one.
I could probably convince myself that seeing a few people on the quiet until sticking with one is fair game.
But I went and slept with one, the first time I met her, and lost the L plates (excuse the way of putting it!). And that's sort of troubling me more, although what's done is done. It now feels like a mistake, and I feel awful for doing it.
Thanks for the help anyway guys, much appreciated
Cheers, I should have gone with what my gut tells me on one of them, but didn't really spot that the other was using me as second best until her ex came into the conversation...