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funeral clothes

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Okay sorry this is quite depressing, have a funeral coming up

everyone is told to dress brightly or how he would have remembered you

but i want to be respectful though and what is acceptable and what isn't?
apart from the obvious like he would remember me probably in one of his or his mates t-shirts and french knickers but i hardly think that's suitable

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    apart from the obvious like he would remember me probably in one of his or his mates t-shirts and french knickers but i hardly think that's suitable

    :lol: I'm sure it would break the ice.

    I would wear something black either skirt or top but then try and maybe a colored jacket or something. So you kind of look respectable in black but have tried to be a little different. I wouldn't go over the top with sparkles and short skirts etc. :D

    Maybe ask some of your friends who will be going and ask what they are wearing..

    Good luck :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    everyone is told to dress brightly or how he would have remembered you

    In that case, I'd imagine you're going out for a meal with a brand spanking new boyfriend and his elderly (and very easily shockable) grandparents. That's the kind of look I'd go for. You want to look like you, but you also want to look smart and respectful, so lay off the miniskirts and plunging necklines.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Id just wear black or dark neutral colours.
    I would feel very uncomfortable wearing brights to a funeral.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i think it's more the case that you'd be being disrespectful if you went against what he wanted. is is a colourful thing or a no black allowed thing?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm with SCC, would feel quite weird and uncomfortable wearing anything other than black - but if the family have requested otherwise then that's all good too.

    I'd go for neutral if you're not sure. Sounds a bit weird, but do you have anything that reminds you of him? Like an accessory or something he gave you (even if you carried it in your handbag or something?)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would feel very uncomfortable wearing brights to a funeral.

    even if it's what they wanted?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would just go in my normal clothes.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I always feel that funerals are about the family and friends who have lost the person, rather than what the person who has died would have wanted (unless they were really keen on having a certain funeral and told people about it, because obviously then their wishes would be respected). But basically, if you've been asked not to be too somber, then it would be respectful to dress how you've been asked to; ie with a bit of colour and more 'normal' than formal funeral black.
    But if you feel too uncomfortable with that, go for a compromise and wear something you feel is respectful, but with an added bit of colour somewhere.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    .
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    kaffrin wrote: »
    In that case, I'd imagine you're going out for a meal with a brand spanking new boyfriend and his elderly (and very easily shockable) grandparents. That's the kind of look I'd go for. You want to look like you, but you also want to look smart and respectful, so lay off the miniskirts and plunging necklines.

    :yes: That's the one.


    Seriously, I've been to loads of funerals (you get that when you've sung in a church choir and been a server). Relatively few people now wear the full all over black mourning job. Whether it's in a church or not, go for what you'd wear to church, neat and tidy.

    You can always wear the french knickers underneath!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have been to two funerals...

    For my friends there was a 'yellow' theme and everyone was given a daffodil - I wore a grey suit with a bright yellow shirt (had to borrow it from a friend!)

    For my Dad's I wore a smart black suit with a bright orange top underneath - I looked very smart but with a splash of colour it gave me a warming feeling...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I went to far too many funerals last year.... there was no written code that it had to be anything other than black,but since they were all close to me, I knew if had they been there to see me, in full black mourning clothes they would have laughed like hell.

    So yeah, like said before, I dressed as though I was going somewhere that I needed to look stunning, but respectable at the same time. Usually a black skirt and some high heels, with whatever top I decided was suitable. Speaking to other people sometimes helps. For the last funeral I went to, I'd had a tattoo done the day before, so wasn't going to wear my skirt incse it looked a bit disrespectful - fresh tattoo shining away on my leg. But the widow told me he would have loved that I'd finally been brave enough to have it, and convinced me to wear the skirt. And she was right. So I'd have a think about what they'd really love you to show up in.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    gwst's idea is a gooden!

    if you dont feel comfy in bright clothes...just accessorise!

    maybe wear black skirt/pants with a black top and wear brightly coloured beads, bangle, bag, maybe even belt
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Its not a fashion show though so dont even worry about looking great/stunning/impressive with a splash of colour here and there or accessories - who gives a fuck about that. Its a bloody funeral :S. Just wear something respectful. As long as youre there thats all people care about.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Its not a fashion show though so dont even worry about looking great/stunning/impressive with a splash of colour here and there or accessories - who gives a fuck about that. Its a bloody funeral :S. Just wear something respectful. As long as youre there thats all people care about.

    that come across as slightly rude....

    she was asking for ideas on what to wear

    she has been asked to wear bright colours so people have given suggestions on how to do it in an understated way

    the family have requested bright things or how he would have remembered her, so unless she dresses in all black all the time, she wouldnt be adhering to that request by wearing an all dark outfit
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sorry it came across as rude. I just find it distasteful discussing what to wear at a funeral as though its a fashion show and youre there to impress people.
    Noone will be offended by someone wearing black to a funeral.

    I`ll butt out now.
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