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What would you do if...?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I been with ma bf for ova a 3 months now and he has recently asked me if i would go down on him i didn knw what to say at first cause i was in shock then we talked bout it and he said that if he done it to me would i do it to him but i dunno what to say dont get me wrong i love and trust him but him asking the kind throu me if you get what i mean. what would you do if you was in my position.
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you want to go down on him and you're comfortable doing it, then do it.

    If you don't want to do it, don't.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It should never ever be about "well you won't do it to me so I won't do it to you" and don't let him pressurise you into it, whether he goes down on you or not. If I were you I'd tell him I'd do it when I was ready, and then wait for that moment to come.. one day you'll just carry on and do it.

    I love going down on my boyfriend and do so regularly, but he has been down on me maybe 3 times early on in the two years we've been together. I would never dream of demanding he go down on me, and as he doesn't like it I don't even ask, it can be very off putting as you've found out. Just don't let it put you off completely.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It should never ever be about "well you won't do it to me so I won't do it to you" and don't let him pressurise you into it, whether he goes down on you or not.


    Jesus, I completely missed that bit.


    You shouldn't feel obliged to do anything that you don't want to do. He's an arse if he pressures you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    To be honest, i wouldn't sleep with someone if i weren't comfortable going down on them - in my mind there isn't that much difference, but i understand and accept that that might just be me.

    If you feel comfortable and happy doing it, then go for it. If not, then think about why not - is it because you just don't like the idea? Or because you've had bad experiences? You've said that you trust him, if it's because you don't like the idea or have had bad experiences or anything else then you need to talk to him about it - relationships are about communication, and they don't last that well unless you talk to each other. It is quite an intimate experience but so is sex. I personally enjoy it, but if it's not for you, then don't feel pressurised into doing it - he should understand if you don't like it and there are plenty of other ways for him to get off!

    If you've not done it before, then again, you need to talk to him. Ask him what he enjoys, what feels good. It's the only way you'll learn and he'll certainly enjoy it :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    For a long time, I have been convinced that it's easier to get blood out of a stone than it is to get a woman to suck a cock. I get the idea that most women don't actually like doing so. Maybe they worry they won't know how to please him, or that his cum will have a revolting taste. Both fears are probably justified. If I was in your position, I'd suggest a compromise. Why don't you give him a handjob instead? I'm sure he'd be more than happy to teach you!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I used to be afraid to give oral sex, so started off doing it by using flavoured condoms. Why not explain you're scared, and use those. He should be happy with that idea. By the way, cum not only tastes a bit iffy (dependent on diet) but has a texture like snot (not dependent on diet) so I don't think anyone blames you for not wanting it in your mouth.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I love going down on my boyfriend and do so regularly, but he has been down on me maybe 3 times.

    Whereas I'm the exact opposite if you change three to 2, and remove the implication that he got anything out of it >.<. But he doesn't mind. In fact, if I ever imply that I might want to, he stops me from doing anything to him.

    Anyway, OP, if you don't want to do it he shouldn't be pressurising you into doing so. If he asks you that "if I do it to you, will you do it to me?" question again, say "only if I feel like I'm ready to". It is pretty daunting, particularly if you've never done it before, so I can't blame you for being scared of it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    why were you shocked by him asking that?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hi every1
    thnks for all your comments so far, but keep them coming. in answer to some of your questions. i am not sure what to do because i have never done it before, therefore wouldn know what exactly to do, the outCum lol is also off putting the whole thing of how it taste etc puts me off. i was also shocked because it has never been mentioned before so when it was mentioned is was just slightly shocking. Keep the comments coming though please and if you could help with the reasons as to why i am put off doing it that would be great :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    personally i wouldn't have gone three months without doing it....but maybe i'm just obsessive :chin:

    are you actually having sex or doing anything at all sexual? I'd recommend just starting to kiss him other places than just his lips...shoulders, back, arms, hips...work your way up to it. don't just unzip his trousers one day and start sucking - that's not the way to encourage yourself. you don't have to go the whole way the first few times either - just kiss him all over and then stop. build it up rather than pressuring yourself into thinking that the first time has to be the most amazing thing he's ever felt.

    if you don't want to, don't let him pressure you into it, but i'd certainly say don't knock it 'til you've tried it. I love doing it, and I appreciate that other girls hate it, but I really don't think it's something you should never do because you put too much pressure on yourself to begin with.

    ooh and remember that diet will have a big impact on how good he tastes, so make sure he's eating well and not drinking too much.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lucky88 wrote: »
    hi every1
    thnks for all your comments so far, but keep them coming. in answer to some of your questions. i am not sure what to do because i have never done it before, therefore wouldn know what exactly to do, the outCum lol is also off putting the whole thing of how it taste etc puts me off. i was also shocked because it has never been mentioned before so when it was mentioned is was just slightly shocking. Keep the comments coming though please and if you could help with the reasons as to why i am put off doing it that would be great :)

    how do you know about the taste if you have never done it?

    Just curious.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if you want to do it do it. if you don't then don't. its not such a big thing.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    cause of what has been said in previous comments n people etc
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lucky88 wrote: »
    cause of what has been said in previous comments n people etc

    well... you 'aint going to find anyone honestly telling you it tastes nice :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think it tastes nice- you never know, you might really like it...

    Does your boyfriend know you've never done it before? If not, I think you should tell him, because he will know to be more sensitive and give you lots of guidance and so on if he knows that. I would certainly say give it a try, because you might love it. Of course, you might not and there's obviously nothing wrong with that, but you'll never know unless you try.

    However, I would also say, don't be pressured into it- try it because you want to try it, not because you feel like you have to or because someone is making you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yeah he does know that i have not done it before.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Mila wrote: »
    I think it tastes nice- you never know, you might really like it...
    warm sticky cum :yum: :eek2:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hey i like it too. though guys taste different... some are :yuck:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    otter wrote: »
    well... you 'aint going to find anyone honestly telling you it tastes nice :p

    Well it's not the most delicious delicacy on the planet, but it's not unpleasant! Don't be out off by what you might have heard other people say, OP....the only way you'll find out if you like it or what you think of how he tastes is if you try it.....but like everyone else has said, only if you feel comfortable doing it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    just dont let yourself be pushed as that can make the experience unplesant rather than the actual act of it itself which you could really enjoy-take your time it is a very intimate thing in my opinion but yeah try it before you write it off:yes:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Dont let anybody push you in to something you dont want to do even if you do love and trust him. If you feel your not ready then just tell him. And about how it tastes if he keeps down there nice and clean and he doesnt eat strong things like spicy foods and he doesnt drink beer and coffee things like that regulaly then i should imagine it wouldnt taste too bad
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Don't let yourself be pushed into doing it ever, but also don't be scared or put off by things you hear or read.

    Let him guide you as to what he likes and you'll soon be having him completely in your power. You'll learn how to tease, how to make him beg for more etc and it is by far the way you can be totally in control...or maybe I'm just a power crazy annoying bitch who loves making him do exactly what I want and teasing, but either way, he loves it, I love it so whats the problem there.

    As others have said, start slowly and don't feel you have to go all the way with it the first time. If you prefer try a 69, means the focus isnt entirely on what you're doing and perhaps will make you feel more comfortable. As for the taste it really isn't that bad at all. It does depend on diet, but there's been very few guys that have tasted really bad in my experience.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    stargalaxy wrote: »
    For a long time, I have been convinced that it's easier to get blood out of a stone than it is to get a woman to suck a cock. I get the idea that most women don't actually like doing so. Maybe they worry they won't know how to please him, or that his cum will have a revolting taste. Both fears are probably justified. If I was in your position, I'd suggest a compromise. Why don't you give him a handjob instead? I'm sure he'd be more than happy to teach you!

    Really ?

    Thats suprising .. I don't mind at all but i have to really fancy the person at the time, i only did it to one of my old boyfriends once cos i reeeeeally didnt fancy him .. makes me wonder why i was with im really

    handjobs are boring in my opinion

    if you dont feel comfortable giving head dont do it wait til the right moment when you want to do it
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    stargalaxy wrote: »
    If I was in your position, I'd suggest a compromise. Why don't you give him a handjob instead? I'm sure he'd be more than happy to teach you!

    Handjobs are the only thing I'm going to be giving. Blowjobs are a no-no. Too many bad experiences, some men just seem to expect you enjoy it. Its doesnt taste nice, the consitency, taste and often being expected to swollow cum, are also put offs. I love having oral done on me and dislike being fingered most of the time though. Different strokes for different folks.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Handjobs are the only thing I'm going to be giving. Blowjobs are a no-no. Too many bad experiences, some men just seem to expect you enjoy it. It doesnt taste nice, the consitency, taste and often being expected to swollow cum, are also put offs.
    This is simply because a lot of men have seen porn films. We all know how every single film involving one man and one woman goes...

    Scene 1: Woman remarks on how large man's penis is before giving a blowjob.
    Scene 2: Man enters woman and she groans at a ridicilously loud volume.
    Scene 3: Man and woman have sex in lots of different positions, many of whom are simply to show penetration on camera.
    Scene 4: Woman gets on knees and begs man to "cum on my face" or something equally cliched and banal.

    It's a sequence I find rather dull. Where's the scene where the man is giving her oral sex, for God's sake? ;) I view handjobs as a happy medium between the two extremes.

    And no, I do not want to see this up for nomination as Post of the Week in a few days time!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    stargalaxy wrote: »
    This is simply because a lot of men have seen porn films. We all know how every single film involving one man and one woman goes...

    Scene 1: Woman remarks on how large man's penis is before giving a blowjob.
    Scene 2: Man enters woman and she groans at a ridicilously loud volume.
    Scene 3: Man and woman have sex in lots of different positions, many of whom are simply to show penetration on camera.
    Scene 4: Woman gets on knees and begs man to "cum on my face" or something equally cliched and banal.

    It's a sequence I find rather dull.

    I'd suggest that's because you have, quite clearly, watched waaaaayyy too much porn.
    stargalaxy wrote: »
    And no, I do not want to see this up for nomination as Post of the Week in a few days time!

    I don't think that's going to be a problem.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'd suggest that's because you have, quite clearly, watched waaaaayyy too much porn.
    Not really. When you've seen one, you've seen them all. I don't watch pornography at all these days anyway.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    stargalaxy wrote: »
    It's a sequence I find rather dull. Where's the scene where the man is giving her oral sex, for God's sake? ;)

    I rarely see porn without it. Anyway, yeah I reckon most mens initial expectations of sex come from porn. They expect all these ridiculous positions that look good on camera will feel just as good in real life, and you won't stop halfway through going "ah, ah, ah, cramp, cramp, gimme a sec."
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I rarely see porn without it. Anyway, yeah I reckon most mens initial expectations of sex come from porn.
    Precisely. One of my mates - a guy who's tried most of the things that can be tried sexually, to say the least - has told me that, the first time a woman refused to give him a blowjob, he felt that it was some kind of attack on his masculinity. It was quite a wake up call for him. Even he admitted it sounded pathetic.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You can give a blow job but the guy doesn't have to cum in your mouth, if you're that concerned about the taste. Just tell him to let you know when he's about to cum so he can pull out and shoot his load all over your face instead.
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