If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
help plz
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
i posted this on another thread but i thought posting it here i might get good advice
i started going out with this really nice guy 4 days ago and we are really happy 2gether. im 16 and hes 18. he has asked me to get engaged to him and move in with him and i really want to say yes. the onli trouble is my fuc*in parents wont approve. but i love him and dont want to upset him
what do i do?!
plz help
i started going out with this really nice guy 4 days ago and we are really happy 2gether. im 16 and hes 18. he has asked me to get engaged to him and move in with him and i really want to say yes. the onli trouble is my fuc*in parents wont approve. but i love him and dont want to upset him
what do i do?!
plz help
0
Comments
Try to stick in the right area please, makes things a lot easier for everyone
I have no useful advice at all as I'm an idiot.
Say no.
Far too young.
Far too quick.
Far too scary, IMO.
Four days isn't enough time to know whether you like his taste in music, have the same opinion on the Euro and can withstand minor bickering and arguing... let alone enough time to know whether - or even reasonably expect that - you're compatible enough to live together
My advice would be to forget ALL ABOUT engagement for the moment. You're probably damn right that your parents wouldn't approve, but for very valid reasons that you're simply too swept off your feet to be able to understand right now. If he likes and respects you at all he won't be "upset" by the fact that you are making a rational, age-appropriate, relationship-length-appropriate and sensible decision that you want to take things slowly and get to know each other as young, carefree and indepedent people before rushing into anything that's slightly harder to undo.
Take your time, enjoy getting to know him and remember that it's not a race
thanx for advice angel! im just worried about saying no to him because i dont want to upset him :crying:
Blimey!!! Way too fast...nice to know where you could head with him in the future if you want to, but try not to rush it!!! :thumb:
Honey, I would be running an Irish mile by now.
This lad sounds quite unbalanced and I honestly can't see anything good coming of it with him if he's so utterly keen so early on.
Just sounds too scary for me.
If I were you I'd tell him in no uncertain terms to cool his jets. No way do you want to start trying for a baby in 4 day old relationship! You have infinite time to do that and all these other things he's hastily (and quite bizarrely, to be honest) suggesting. He needs to relax and you need to assert yourself and you both need to focus on enjoying each other and your new relationship. No hurry
You're spot on there. It's not a good idea in the slightest.
Anyway if you feel so good together then whats the rush to move in or get married? Most people tend to argue more when in company of each other more often so put that to the test first
If he dumps you for that then he's a knob ! Then your answer would already be decided for you. All you gota do is say to him "whats the rush" don't beat the shit out of a good thing. You get me? Im sure he will understand
??????????
Seriously, if he does anything BUT accept it graciously, I would have reservations about his mental state. Saying that, I already do, but these reservations would grow.
I doubt that very much, by the sounds of it.
Hmmm.....are you sure you know what you're getting yourself into?? If it's this dramatic 4 days in, and you know he's on antidepressants, I'd say you're only setting yourself up for worse tbh....
Not cure exactly but help the matter for however long they are needed
Sorry.. I sort of said that wrong...I mean...if he's suggesting all this stuff 4 days in, then he might suggest more further on....and as a sort of separate issue, there might also be ongoing issues with his mental health which you may have to deal with...which all sounds a bit dramatic and a bit much to me for a 4 day old relationship.
All depends on how he is feeling really, thats down to his doctor. Alot of people can stay on them for a long time.
If you end up doing everything he says then in 3 years you will live on a farm with 20 kids :shocking:
i never thought about past issues with his mental health cuz when he phoned me last night he was talking about when he split up with his ex (he caught her in bed with another man) and he said he had to be dragged out the house by the police and was in hospital for a month with mental breakdown
I don't think they would keep you in hospital a month for a mental breakdown, what a waste of a bed.
Sounds like you can pick at his story's quite easily