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Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
If someone you were going out with asked for some space for a bit would you go off the roof?
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Has this happen to you? Do you know why they want space?
I asked for a bit, explained I have a lot on at the moment. Plus I am ill as well. They said they are an all or nothing person and don't seem to be able to allow me to have any.
If you still want to be with him then I'd avoid the cliche of 'I need some space'. Maybe you have a lot on and don't want him to be hurt if you can't spend as much time with him as you'd want to? So are warning him in advance?
I don't know..but the whole 'space' thing. Yeah I'd be worried.
Ahh I presumed it was the other way around. Well I still stick to what I said, I wouldn't be angry if I was him, just concerned.
It's good that you're being honest from the outset, rather than just blanking him or letting him down. But I also agree with Racheal, 'some space' has bad connotations. Maybe you should just say you won't be able to spend as much time with him as you like at the moment, but you will be able to soon. Is it a long-term thing, or a fairly new guy?
Fairly new person...They are now wanting to know where they stand with me and think I don't like them.
No, i would hold it all on the inside and get an ulcer!
Hm, well it may be a bit off-putting at the start of a relationship to be told that the other person won't be able to spend much time with you. Are you sure you want a relationship at the moment? If so, I think you've just got to make it really clear to him that you do like him, and really want to be with him, just that you don't have much spare time at the moment and have a lot of things going on. But that won't be the case forever.
No, I'd give them that space if they want it, but also ask to talk through why they need space.
It's a sign to me personally. Ive had it recently as it happens. If they were that important, you'd make the time, if you cant then well, what do you really think of the guy? When girls comes on like this, it usually means, to me anyway, they're letting you down easy. It's cowards path! Your all b*tches for it an all, because it really isn't the best way to do it imo. Leaving a guy on a cliff hanger like that sends all kinda thoughts through his noggin. Tell him straight! Be upfront! Dilly dallying around is very imature and very, very unfair!
can ye tell im bitter!? Can ya?
:yes:
Box - what on earth are you on about?
What Sparky_Star said seems like a good idea as well.
I'm rambling! I've heard the 'I need space shite :nervous: ' before!
Jeeze chill out man! Some people have other things they have to concentrate on in their lives as well! I don't take it well being referred to as a bitch either matey.
There is more to life than someone's boyfriend/girlfriend.
You really do need to calm down.
If it was a new relationship especially, id also feel embarrassed that they thought i was too full on.
If it was new, id probably consider just ending it.
It would really depend on the whole rest of the relationship though tbh.
I said to the highly detailed, vintage year pigeon. "Can you spare us a few plastic containers for my day in the ceramic tea pot country known as ozaki speaker-ingdom?"
Still includes me...but anyway...nice chatting with you
Go talk to the girl whos bothering you lol
I was in a similar situaion with a friend of mine a while back and when he told me that he needed space/wasn't ready to chat to me, I didn't instantly think 'he doesn't like me'.
Its only his opinion.
Sad thing is...it's not just girls do this...a bloke just did similar thing to me...said he thought I was great but was really busy...to me, sure sign he's not interested any more...if that's not what you meant, Fairy, think you should have picked your words better tbh....
Oh no!! Wasn't going into the whole 'you vs. Box' thing...meant your original words...to your new bloke...think you should have maybe worded it more sensitively...cos know if I hear "I need more space", I instantly think "I'm dumped"....:no:
Biiggg knock in confidence for your fella....so even if he's still interested, he might not have the guts to say so now..:(
Yeah spoken to them about it...its a girl btw. I guess people take things in different ways. Previous note was in response to SuzyCreamCheese.
Ohhh!!! It was for SCC!! Got all confused...oops!! And yes...should have realised you were talking about a girl...my mistake all round...sorry!!
But glad you've spoken to her about it...would be a shame for her to think she's unwanted when all you literally meant was "I need a bit of time"...