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For anyone that cares, a bit of news

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
For anyone that cares, a bit of news (and yes I'm posting on the "wrong" thread, because "my" thread has been locked).

Pulled a girl tonight for the first time ever in my 23 years. Listened to the advice of just going ahead and making a move, nothing to lose. Started dancing with her, she was (surprisingly!) really responsive so I was pretty confident and we started pulling for the next hour. Asked if she wants to see me again she said yes, will be doing so this weekend.

You'd think I'd be over the moon given my thread, the psychological need to get rid of those 'virgin-lips' plates. To be honest I don't feel a thing. I should feel so happy that I can no longer claim I'm 'completely unfanciable' and have 'never kissed a girl'. But a) she was 16 (doing GCSEs!) and not that attractive, feel given my looks/status I ought to do better like everyone else of my calibre does, and b) she was a crap kisser! As if it was her first time, lots of feeling teeth/her sticking her tongue out/slobbering - it's actually felt nicer to just be kissed on the lips by girls who see me as a close friend.
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    16 and at school?

    Thats bordering on just being wrong at your age.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jomery wrote: »
    But a) she was 16 (doing GCSEs!) and not that attractive, feel given my looks/status I ought to do better like everyone else of my calibre does, and b) she was a crap kisser! As if it was her first time, lots of feeling teeth/her sticking her tongue out/slobbering - it's actually felt nicer to just be kissed on the lips by girls who see me as a close friend.

    how shallow does one man wanna be? infact, i cant even believe you've come out with the "my staus/looks" shit AGAIN

    you've been told time and time again that those thngs dont mean shit if you act like a numpty

    because you think you're good looking and smart, anyone who isnt gorgeous and clever hbas no right to even show interest in you?

    you need to grow up!

    you spend months whinging that you cant get a girl, finally someone shows interest in you and you do nothing but slag them off!

    no wonder women give you a wide berth, you sound a prat

    at the end of the day, YOU pulled her, if you didnt find her attractive or thought she was too young, why bother?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Littleali wrote: »
    how shallow does one man wanna be?

    because you think you're good looking and smart, anyone who isnt gorgeous and clever hbas no right to even show interest in you?

    you need to grow up!

    Give the guy a break! Most of the time people would say that getting with people they don't fancy would be desperate. Now it's shallow not to??
    Littleali wrote: »
    you spend months whinging that you cant get a girl, finally someone shows interest in you and you do nothing but slag them off!

    I'd say it's about standards. Just because he's not pulled before and feels bad about it he can't choose who he'd like to pull?
    Littleali wrote: »
    at the end of the day, YOU pulled her, if you didnt find her attractive or thought she was too young, why bother?

    I agree with this to an extent. However, things could be a bit trickier than that. He might not have known how old she was to begin with and definitely not if she was a crap kisser. I'd guess he went for her because he thought he'd feel better for having pulled when in truth that's not how it goes.

    My first kiss was with some guy I didn't fancy the look of, I just wanted to get it over with because I felt quite insecure about my lack of experience. The kissing sucked and I didn't feel happy at all. Today I'm very relieved I didn't make him my first to have sex with, although I did consider it. I wouldn't call that shallow -closer to desperate, and I'm glad I didn't go there.

    At the end of the day, Jomery stepped outside his comfort zone and it yielded some result. Maybe it wasn't his ideal result but it's a step forward and he should be proud of himself for having done that. He should however NOT go around chasing girls he doesn't fancy because he thinks it's all he can do.

    Jomery, if you meet the girl again and there still isn't any real chemistry between the two of you, I'd recommend you go fishing again. :) Now you know you can do it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jaloux wrote: »
    Give the guy a break! Most of the time people would say that getting with people they don't fancy would be desperate. Now it's shallow??

    i didnt say he was shallow for pulling someone he didnt fancy...did i?

    i meant he is shallow because he thinks he is above her, that she isnt up to his calibre, he is too big headed for his own good

    I'd say it's about standards. Just because he's not pulled before and feels bad about it he can't choose who he'd like to pull?

    standards or not, he chose to make a move on her and she responded, just because she is younger and not stunning, doesnt give him the right to slag her off, he should see her as doing him a favour, yeah she may not be his type, but she didnt reject him and she shown him the time of day

    At the end of the day, Jomery stepped outside his comfort zone and it yielded some result. Maybe it wasn't his ideal result but it's a step forward and he should be proud of himself for having done that. He should however NOT go around chasing girls he doesn't fancy because he thinks it's all he can do.

    thats the thing though, he isnt proud of himself, he said it, he doesnt feel anything because she isnt up to his standards

    i agree, it is a step forward, but with his attitude, i feel it'll be one step forward and 3 back
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think a big part of his problem is how quick he is to compare himself to those around him. I think that's why he sounds so full of himself.

    What he said sounded a bit weird, but to an extent I can identify with his feelings. I meant he should be proud for having done something he hasn't before, not focus on being proud of pulling this particular girl -especially if he doesn't fancy her.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jomery wrote: »
    You'd think I'd be over the moon given my thread, the psychological need to get rid of those 'virgin-lips' plates. To be honest I don't feel a thing. I should feel so happy that I can no longer claim I'm 'completely unfanciable' and have 'never kissed a girl'. But a) she was 16 (doing GCSEs!) and not that attractive, feel given my looks/status I ought to do better like everyone else of my calibre does, and b) she was a crap kisser! As if it was her first time, lots of feeling teeth/her sticking her tongue out/slobbering - it's actually felt nicer to just be kissed on the lips by girls who see me as a close friend.

    I so hope she is saying the exact same things to her friends. Thats an awful thing to say about someone, especially someone that young who is probably as inexperienced as you.

    Also saying "like everyone else of my calibre", i'm sorry but what calibre is that? 23 year old virgin calibre? The only person thats remotely interested in your calibre (i presume you mean rich and a Cambridge grad?) is you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jomery wrote: »
    b) she was a crap kisser! As if it was her first time, lots of feeling teeth/her sticking her tongue out/slobbering

    That's what everyone kisses like.






















    What? I'm not allowed to take the piss? Anyway, well done, you've got that monkey off your back. You've seen that she's interested, approached her, had a conversation, made a move, and it's all gone well. All good stuff. Just a quick question though. If you don't like her, why are you seeing her again?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jomery wrote: »
    For anyone that cares, a bit of news (and yes I'm posting on the "wrong" thread, because "my" thread has been locked).

    Pulled a girl tonight for the first time ever in my 23 years. Listened to the advice of just going ahead and making a move, nothing to lose. Started dancing with her, she was (surprisingly!) really responsive so I was pretty confident and we started pulling for the next hour. Asked if she wants to see me again she said yes, will be doing so this weekend.

    You'd think I'd be over the moon given my thread, the psychological need to get rid of those 'virgin-lips' plates. To be honest I don't feel a thing. I should feel so happy that I can no longer claim I'm 'completely unfanciable' and have 'never kissed a girl'. But a) she was 16 (doing GCSEs!) and not that attractive, feel given my looks/status I ought to do better like everyone else of my calibre does, and b) she was a crap kisser! As if it was her first time, lots of feeling teeth/her sticking her tongue out/slobbering - it's actually felt nicer to just be kissed on the lips by girls who see me as a close friend.

    Well done, now you've kissed a girl the next step is to learn to respect women, not to objectify them and to come down to planet earth where not everybody who is slightly above average as regards looks and who has a good job deserves a pet girlfriend.

    The only way is up baby!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Namaste wrote: »
    Well done, now you've kissed a girl the next step is to learn to respect women, not to objectify them and to come down to planet earth where not everybody who is slightly above average as regards looks and who has a good job deserves a pet girlfriend.

    :eek2:

    He kissed her, she kissed him, that's what it's all about, if he didn't like it fair enough. If he didn't think she was that attractive, fair enough. I don't see how thinking those kind of things mean you're objectifying women and that you only want a trophy girlfriend.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How do you know you wern't a crap kisser?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    MLY wrote: »
    16 and at school?

    Thats bordering on just being wrong at your age.

    Hmm yeah. I'm 23 she's 16. My reputation's pretty important given my job etc. Will people make really bad comments? Should I not bother?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You've insulted her about her kissing, her looks, etc.

    Why would she want anything to do with you?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ShyBoy wrote: »
    :eek2:

    He kissed her, she kissed him, that's what it's all about, if he didn't like it fair enough. If he didn't think she was that attractive, fair enough. I don't see how thinking those kind of things mean you're objectifying women and that you only want a trophy girlfriend.

    But a) she was 16 (doing GCSEs!) and not that attractive, feel given my looks/status I ought to do better like everyone else of my calibre does, and b) she was a crap kisser! As if it was her first time, lots of feeling teeth/her sticking her tongue out/slobbering - it's actually felt nicer to just be kissed on the lips by girls who see me as a close friend.

    That isn't objectification?

    Women are not trophies ffs.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You've insulted her about her kissing, her looks, etc.

    Why would she want anything to do with you?

    :yes:

    Stop cradle snatching and get off your pedistool. You're not a bad looking guy, but you're no Brad Pitt... As for your career, any woman likely to love you for who you are won't give a toss about that... Although if you just want a quick fling and to be a sugar daddy then it can help.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jomery, what do you actually to out of meeting up with her?

    surely not a relationship, due to your negative comments
    surely not a friend, as your previous suggests you have enough female friends

    If your just looking to loose your virginity, you arent being very fair on the girl at all.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Namaste wrote: »
    Well done, now you've kissed a girl the next step is to learn to respect women, not to objectify them and to come down to planet earth where not everybody who is slightly above average as regards looks and who has a good job deserves a pet girlfriend.

    The only way is up baby!

    :heart:

    Totally agree with all of that, I find your sense of entitlement bizarre to say the least.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jomery wrote: »
    Hmm yeah. I'm 23 she's 16. My reputation's pretty important given my job etc. Will people make really bad comments? Should I not bother?

    Why would you bother with someone who you said you don't like? Personally, I see anyone in a club as fair game for a bit of pulling (tbh, I never really ask), but I wouldn't actually go out with anyone under 18. I mean if you met your perfect girl at work or something and she just happened to be 16 then that's different, but I wouldn't go out with a 16 year old I barely knew. Nor would I go out with someone I'm not interested in, just for the sake of having attention from a girl.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Should she even have been out? Why are you seeing her again if you don't like her. Stick to over 18's tbh.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jomery.

    She's far too young. Just don't follow up on this one, at all. Take the experience, log it, and move onwards otherwise you could *really* hurt this lass. 16 is a bit of an impressionable age.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Meh, many people have already said similar to what I'm going to say but what the hell...

    Jomery, well-done on this first experience of yours, but sadly it's a sarcastic "well-done". It looks like you've simply used this girl as an ego boost, you've found someone vulnerable (and easy) likely because of her age. The real challenge is to realise who is right for you (or not right for you) and act appropriately.

    This encounter might feel very satisfying now but you already realise that things are not going to work out. You'll find a relationship with someone more compatable far more interesting and satisfying!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Man I'm 20 and I've been with a 15 year old. Always someone worse off. :o
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yerascrote wrote: »
    Man I'm 20 and I've been with a 15 year old. Always someone worse off. :o

    Ooorrrrrrrrmmmmm, I'm telliiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnng.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ooorrrrrrrrmmmmm, I'm telliiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnng.

    It's not illegal...IF IT'S ANAL!

    Nah haven't actually had sex but have kissed two 15 year olds this past year, once I didn' know and the other time the girl was really mature so yeh there ya go, it's not the norm but fuck it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    UP THE BUTT, JOM!

    Yea see... it's just a matter of time. I was recently talking to a collegue of a friend. A gorgeous girl and she said she just has her first boyfriend ever, with 18... It happenes, you can't force things...
    You've insulted her about her kissing, her looks, etc.

    Why would she want anything to do with you?

    Well, she doesn't know about it, hm? :razz:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yerascrote wrote: »
    It's not illegal...IF IT'S ANAL!

    Nah haven't actually had sex but have kissed two 15 year olds this past year, once I didn' know and the other time the girl was really mature so yeh there ya go, it's not the norm but fuck it.

    My mate did that once. He was 18 and he kissed this girl. He was gutted when he found out afterwards she was 14. Now I understand why none of the girls were interested when we were in school. They were busy with blokes with cars and beer and drugs and fake ID's. :grump:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My mate did that once. He was 18 and he kissed this girl. He was gutted when he found out afterwards she was 14. Now I understand why none of the girls were interested when we were in school. They were busy with blokes with cars and beer and drugs and fake ID's. :grump:

    Of course. What did boys our own age have to offer? An awkward grope and a ride home on the bus.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    MLY wrote: »
    An awkward grope and a ride home on the bus.

    Better than no grope and walking.

    :sour:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Maybe relationships aren't for you. Concentrate on your career or something.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ShyBoy wrote: »
    :eek2:

    He kissed her, she kissed him, that's what it's all about, if he didn't like it fair enough. If he didn't think she was that attractive, fair enough. I don't see how thinking those kind of things mean you're objectifying women and that you only want a trophy girlfriend.

    he said she wasnt attractive (which is fine!) but he then went that step further and basically said she was beneath him because he's better looking/educated

    that attitude, will get him no where

    hardly any relationships are 100% equal, there's sometimes one partner who is better looking, one who earns more, one who is more educated

    it seems to me he is looking for a female version of himself and wont settle for any less

    joremy, agree with others, 16 is too young, plus you dont like her, so why string her along? to boost your ego? to get practice?

    and i hope in 6 years you bump into her again, and she is stunning, and has a degree and lots of money, that'll wpe your eye! she is 16, of course she isnt gonna be everything you want her to be, so stop comparing her to girls that your mates are pulling :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Namaste wrote: »
    But a) she was 16 (doing GCSEs!) and not that attractive, feel given my looks/status I ought to do better like everyone else of my calibre does, and b) she was a crap kisser! As if it was her first time, lots of feeling teeth/her sticking her tongue out/slobbering - it's actually felt nicer to just be kissed on the lips by girls who see me as a close friend.

    That isn't objectification?

    Women are not trophies ffs.
    *Applauds*
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