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Completely unfanciable. I'm going to top myself.
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An analogy - you go to a good school which is extremely academic where 90% of people get AAA or better at A-Level. You're not that clever and will at best get CCC. And normally you'd be fine with that, it's good enough to go to a good uni, get a good job etc. But because your school/environment is so academic, people ask you non-stop about what test results you got in mocks, what are your predicted grades, some people laugh at you for being "thick", the teachers are worried something's wrong with you, and you feel like utter shit as a result that you can't get A grades even though you don't want/need them.
pull yourself together for fucks sake
get out there and have some self-esteem. if you dont respect yourself no one will. so you havent had a shag yet? big deal - things could be worse you could have lost one of your legs from a land mine of something.
Im probably not saying anything you havent heard before in these replies to your post and im sorry im not being very sympathetic but you've been to uni you have a dream job so thats two things to be cheerful.
You will find some one who will sleep with you just dont be sleazy or desperate because most girls including myself find both of those qualities to be quite a turn off. Try talking to girls and act like your worthy of speaking to them and dont act like they are all in leagues above you. Confidence is always good, even if you dont feel confident try to fake it.
I hope some of this helps, sorry if it sounds like im having a go suicide is something i feel quite strongly about.
and anyway, if all else fails you can always hire a hooker ..
Why would it defy the entire point? I'm not having a go, I'm genuinely interested to know. Is t because you would be paying them for a service rather than it being something that happens of their own free will?
i`m guessing that its not ALL about sex, its about building relationships and gaining confidence
which paying a prozzie, wouldnt achieve
correct me if i'm wrong jomery x
it wasnt a serious comment more of a light hearted comment but i didnt expect everyone to see it that way
I think you right with this one. Its about more than sex, its feeling attractive and feeling wanted.
:thumb:
I just try not to let it get me down and have fun whilst getting rejected
Overall, it sounds like you're simply lonely (that it is about more than simply sex but feeling as if you're wanted) - and thats a horrid feeling for anyone to have to endure.
I know.
79
So last night I popped into a house party before going clubbing. Was sat on the sofa and there was a girl next to me. Introduced myself and literally within less than a minute had her leaving the house party with me, I invited her to come to a bar with me.
At the bar we drank a lot, laughed a lot, flirted a lot, then moved onto the club.
At the club there was a bit of hand-holding, touching etc, was dancing with her then suddenly before I know it some random guy in a rugby shirt walks right up, grabs her and pulls her. And they embrace passionately. And I'm standing there looking incredibly embarrassed and sheepish, before leaving pissed off.
So my issue is 'conversion' or 'execution'. There's no way I'd have had the guts to try and pull her last night, because of so many previous experiences where a girl had been all over me ie dirty dancing, but when I move in for the kiss she stops it from happening - turns her cheek, gives me the 'let's be friends' speech, or in more extreme cases 'what the fuck are you playing at?' etc.
Million pounds that guy wasn't a random stranger. Some people are just cock teases who enjoy the attention, or flirt with someone to make someone else jealous. Don't take it to heart. But the important lesson is not to assume anything until it happens. Don't think that because you've put all that "effort" in, that it's a failure because you didn't pull her. It shouldn't be a failure if you had a good conversation with an interesting stranger. If you didn't enjoy the conversation, then that's your problem - you're only engaging in it because of what you can get out of it. It shouldn't be a failure if you're chatting and getting on with a girl and she mentions her boyfriend, or he shows up. It should just means that pulling her is a no go, but it doesn't mean that you can't still talk to her and have fun. None of this will help you pull a particular girl, but it should make you appear more outgoing and approachable, and essentially, more attractive to other girls.
Rest of your post is great, just the last thing I'm looking for right now is to meet new girls to just be friends with, I already have hundreds of them!
What find a girlfriend
(only joking)
If that's already been suggested I apologise...
It seems from what you said you were getting on, also this posts seems quite different to the others. It sounds like you were relaxed laid back but not expecting anything to happen, perhaps you should hold on to that attitude the next time you meet a girl.
I wish there were a way to address and sort out these things which I feel are what's holding me back, if there were some way to go about turning these things around I'd like to know:
Cats aren't going to solve his problems.
gung-ho eh lol
Ok lets all repeatedly give the same advice, over and over again or shall we click our fingers and get him a shag?
As its been said on many occasions - his 'acheivments' in his career and financially do not give you a golden ticket into the land of sex.
Look mate alls i'm saying is whateva 'advice' or 'ahh bless' comments you get on here are going to do you fuck all good.
Men pulled women long before internet forums existed.
Just get out there and keep trying, posting threads saying your going to top yourself will not help you, but will only convince a lot of people you are after more attention.
And I'm not trying to create attention, I'm being pretty serious. A lot of the time I do question what the point is in living. It's not fun. There's a lot more pain than good. I have a "dream job" that a lot of graduates envy - and it means having to wake up at the same time in the morning not lie in till midday, put on uncomfortable socks and shoes, commute to work which is a hassle, etc. When I work out at the gym it is physically painful to push myself. When it pours down with rain and I have no umbrella I get really pissed off. There's relatively little time when I'm having more pleasure than pain - having a massage, lying on a tropical beach etc, but most the time in everyday life there is more pain than gain, so I question what the point is in it all.
You need to stop focusing on meeting girls and trying to pull them. You have lots of girly mates but to be honest, they probably all think you're gay. Make some MALE friends and hang out with them, relax, have a laugh. Learn from how they behave and what they talk about. Don't be ashamed to still be a virgin. They might laugh at you at first but they won't give a shit really. Once you've started to have fun with your male mates and have stopped concentrating on pulling girls I really think that you will actually meet girls who see you as a man who they could sleep with rather than just a friend.
You'll be surprised how easy and from-itself things will work out. Stop caring, make the best of the bad bargain and stop letting it take over your mind 24/7 to make you depressed.
Much sooner as you would expect you'll find her, out of the blue. It just works like that...
Well I'm female, I get lots of male attention, I'm rarely short of dates yet I've graduated and I'm struggling to find a job and I have no money. So I guess we all have it tough in some way or another.
I can't even be arsed going into that lot of miserable, self pitying shite.