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50 Mistakes Women Make When Having Sex

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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lets just be clear, i am just copying and pasting this, not telling you to make notes and change your sex life.

    Like others i found it funny to an extent, didnt really occur to me people would take this shit seriously, i think its suposed to be mockig teenage magazines if anything
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    g_angel007 wrote: »
    You are such a woman sometimes :lol:;)

    he's not the only male that doesn't find it amusing.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    olaola wrote: »
    Lets just be clear, i am just copying and pasting this, not telling you to make notes and change your sex life.

    Like others i found it funny to an extent, didnt really occur to me people would take this shit seriously, i think its suposed to be mockig teenage magazines if anything

    Yea I see where you're coming from, I wasn't having a go at you at all - I was saying some of the comments, especially the one about if he pushes your head down when you're giving him a blowjob then it's your fault - are verging on encouraging what I believe is sexual assault (because basically you're taking control away from them and forcing them to do the sex act).
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ShyBoy wrote: »
    Yea I see where you're coming from, I wasn't having a go at you at all - I was saying some of the comments, especially the one about if he pushes your head down when you're giving him a blowjob then it's your fault - are verging on encouraging what I believe is sexual assault (because basically you're taking control away from them and forcing them to do the sex act).

    :thumb: argreed.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    PussyKatty wrote: »
    That whole thing is written in a nasty demeaning way towards women.

    what?! it's humerous not demeaning. you're a bit of a feminist then, yes?

    i saw that on facebook yesterday, sent it to my friends! i haven't joined the group though seeing as i'm already in 30. :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you're a bit of a feminist then, yes?

    You say that as if its a bad thing:yeees:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lipsy wrote: »
    You say that as if its a bad thing:yeees:

    nah it's not, i'm all for womens rights and all but i think sometimes people need to lighten up. i guess i can see how people might get offended by something like it - however it's my kind of sense of humour so i find it funny.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Can't believe we are on page 3 now and no-one has posted the obvious joke.

    Mistake 51. Do it with olaola! :p

    TBH I read the first 3 and got bored.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yeh it is quite a long read and i thought some of them were a bit lame but on the whole i found it funny. :)
    there should be one for mistakes that men make. ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    what?! it's humerous not demeaning. you're a bit of a feminist then, yes?


    As an older, more experienced woman :D I can see some truth in some of the points.

    But when I was younger it was pretty common for girls to be pressured into doing things they didn't want to do, just to satisfy some horny guy. If you do, you're a "slut: and if you don't, you're a "frigid bitch". So that sort of derogotary language gets my back up. If it had been written in a different way it probably wouldn't have bothered me as much.

    I guess it depends on what you consider funny.

    And if that makes me a feminist because I don't like to see young girls referred to in nasty sexual terms, then so be it!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    eh? you're 23/24 aren't you? not much older than me.

    my age doesn't have anything to do with it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You're misunderstanding me. I didn't mean older than you, just older than the average 16/17 year old starting sexual relationships. Don't take it personally.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    PussyKatty wrote: »
    But when I was younger it was pretty common for girls to be pressured into doing things they didn't want to do, just to satisfy some horny guy. If you do, you're a "slut: and if you don't, you're a "frigid bitch". So that sort of derogotary language gets my back up. If it had been written in a different way it probably wouldn't have bothered me as much.

    I guess it depends on what you consider funny.

    And if that makes me a feminist because I don't like to see young girls referred to in nasty sexual terms, then so be it!

    I totally agree. I usually find sexist or offensive jokes pretty funny but that list just seemed really distasteful.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    PussyKatty wrote: »
    Don't take it personally.

    i'm not. i misunderstood what you were saying.

    however what you said ^ should also be applied to you. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hehe, these comments make me laugh even more than the original post.
    Lighten up people.
    A lot of the things written are totally true and I have experienced them myself but its wrote in an amusing way IMO. Not something someone should take offence by!!

    Am certain the same things wrote about males (which i've seen similar on here before) don't get so many bad comments and they get lots of laughing smilies.

    Its so sad its funny!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lipsy wrote: »
    I totally agree. I usually find sexist or offensive jokes pretty funny but that list just seemed really distasteful.

    :yes:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru

    TBH I read the first 3 and got bored.

    Yea. I didn't find it particularly offensive, just not very funny either.

    I actually think it could have been alot more offensive and derogatory. It's certainly not the worst thing of that type that I've read.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm surprised that anyone's getting so het up about it. The group on facebook went round most of my year in college and we all found it amusing, and took it with the tongue in cheek style it was meant.

    Not every single point is hilarious, but the net list is entertaining if nothing else.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    :lol:

    Good to see this has progressed somewhat now I'm waiting for my connection...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    olaola wrote: »

    5. Expecting him to fall asleep with you in his arms. That shit is uncomfortable after awhile. A little snuggling isn't unreasonable, but when it's time to actually sleep? An arm draped over you should suffice.

    This one is true though, it is bloody uncomfortable. lol
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    pill 'ed wrote: »
    This one is true though, it is bloody uncomfortable. lol

    Yeah I agree, it is uncomfortable. But this much spoken of desire to fall asleep snuggled up is in no way exclusive to women... just as the desire to fall asleep (full stop) after sex is in no way exclusive to men.

    Basically, that list doesn't really make the author look anything more than criminally stupid, and I suspect that's the case rather than her having some vicious agenda against her fellow women. Still doesn't make it funny.

    So yeah, I suppose that's the fatal flaw of a - assumedly heterosexual - woman writing a list of the "mistakes" women make when having sex. She probably hasn't actually shagged [m]any and is obviously just spouting off the old chestnuts she's probably heard from her bravado-riddled male pals... that in order to get some a man has to let a women chat her little heart out after sex, that in order to unlock her chastity belt a woman needs candlelight and red rose petals and a looped Westlife CD and error 404 cliché not found.

    Gimme a break.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yet again, I think this is another example of somebody taking this entirely the wrong way.

    This is one of those things that those who want to take offense with will, and on the other hand, those that will find it funny, equally will.

    I think we should leave this thread here as it's getting a bit dull going back and forth from one extreme to the other.

    G.


    P.S. On a side note, I had forgotten just how much the German people smoke in general!!! *cough* *splutter*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Some of it was funny, largely because it was true, but most of it was unfunny BORDERING ON offensive, and there were parts which downright pissed me off. Mostly the bits which are more about personal preference, like this one:

    19. Refusing to be spontaneous. I know this is shocking, but sometimes sex OUTSIDE of the bedroom is fun.

    Like spontaneity (sp?) is all about leaving the bedroom. I can be spontaneous IN the bedroom too, ya know.

    And before anyone says I'm taking it too personally, I'm not. I laughed at it, not because it was funny, but because it was shit, and for almost every point I was ticking it off as "my boyfriend wouldn't agree with that". Some of them were true, yeh, but most of them just made me roll my eyes. Like this - :rolleyes:.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    pill 'ed wrote: »
    This one is true though, it is bloody uncomfortable. lol

    i don't think this is just a mistake of women though. i can't sleep even with just an arm over me - i like to sleep 'alone'. in the same bed of course but not with any holding etc going on. it makes me feel restricted.
  • **helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
    45 mistakes men make when having sex

    Ok - so five of them were even too offensive to substitute - but I think you get the gist :p

    1. Assuming she's ready when it suits you. Contrary to popular belief, women can't just flip a switch and get horny because you decided to stop being a soft bitch. Getting us wet is your job. I suggest you figure it out.

    2. Thinking that kissing needs to be this sweet romantic thing all the time. Sometimes pressing your lips against your partners mouth while you get off is the hot. It depends on the situation.

    3. Leaving her responsible for your orgasm. You know what gets you off. Tell her. If you don't, it's your own fault when she's snoozing and you're all wound up.

    4. Expecting her to cuddle. Men and women are wired differently. Sex makes most men want to talk and bond and all that shit. It makes women pass out. It's a biological thing. Stop fighting it, and stop holding it over his head, it's not her fault.

    5. Expecting her to fall asleep with you in her arms. That shit is uncomfortable after awhile. A little snuggling isn't unreasonable, but when it's time to actually sleep? An arm draped over you should suffice.

    6. Expecting her to always lay on the charm and romance. Sometimes, that's nice. Sometimes. But expecting her to be all roses and candles all the time is like expecting you to act like a pornstar all the time. If you're not willing to do that, don't expect her to switch for you.

    7. Being selfish in bed. Regardless of the shit that FHM forces down our throats, sex is NOT just about us. Get over it.

    8. Using random magazines as a sex bible. I dont know who comes up with half that shit, but I'm pretty sure they need counseling.

    9. Whining when he pushes your head down on his cock instead of stroking your hair. Know why he's pushing, skippy? Because you aren't doing it right, and have apparently ignored the other clues he's given you. Pay attention to the signals that he's sending you.

    10. Not moving at all. Missionary is not an excuse to do nothing.

    11. Expecting her to undress himself with any amount of grace. He's about to get some cock. Be glad he bothered to take his pants all the way off. If it concerns you so much, undress her yourself.

    12. Not shaving your legs. Im pretty bad at this myself. But if you want your guy stubble free, you better get out the razor.

    13. Allowing your crotch to resemble the amazon. Yes, waxing hurts. Yes, some people don't want to go bare. Thats fine. If you like bush, great. If you have sensitive skin and can't shave, I feel for you. But for the love of Christ, trim that shit if you want her to spend any time down there.

    14. Assuming that sex means a relationship. The only relationship you have is that he has now stuck his hoo hoo dilly in your cha cha. That's as far as it goes unless otherwise noted.

    15. Withholding oral sex just because you're ragging. He didn't do it. Unless you want her to withhold oral sex because he's hormonal, I suggest you get some kneepads.

    16. Expecting her to figure out what you like by what noise you make. Use your words. Have you ever actually heard what you sound like while you're having sex? If you heard yourself on tape, and someone asked you to explain what was causing you to make that noise, 67% of women would respond with answers like "I stubbed my toe" "I ran up the steps" or "I was putting up drywall".

    17. Leaving condoms up to her. If you're sexually active and insist that he uses a condom, I suggest buying a box and keeping it by your bed. Not all men keep them on them, and it's just as much your responsibility as it is his. If you think that makes you a slut, you shouldn't be having sex anyway. Go back to Jr High.

    18. Getting your undies in a bunch when he talks dirty. A little fantasy can be fun. If he treats you with respect all the time, you shouldn't be offended when he calls you his dirty little slut. When he calls you a whore and tells you to come, its his way of showing that he cares if you get off. Stop being a sissy.

    19. Refusing to be spontaneous. I know this is shocking, but sometimes sex OUTSIDE of the bedroom is fun.

    20. Dissing quickies because it's not some slow sensual ordeal. Sex is a dynamic thing. Theres an awesome raw energy when you only have 20 minutes but having to have someone so bad that you do it half clothed against the wall. Readjust your thinking.

    21. Being too much of a pussy to tell her what is or isn't acceptable before you start bumping uglies. Be honest. If he asks if he can poke you in the butt, and you giggle and say no like it's an invitation, don't look surprised when he "accidentally" sticks his a dildo in your butt.

    22. Expecting her to undress you. I put boots on almost every day. I know for a fact that getting them off isn't always easy. Help a sister out.

    23. Undressing in the dark. If youre shy, dim the lights, but give the woman something to see. No ripping off the clothes and diving under the covers, either.

    24. Refusing to get on top. Theres no reason women should have to do all the work.

    25. Getting that bored look on your face. women are more visual than women. Give her something to look at. Get on top and arch your back a little bit. Move. Do something to indicate that you 1) are not dead and 2) didn't suffer a minor stroke rendering you unable to move.

    26. Expecting her to do all the touching when you're riding him. It's your body, you're used to it. Play with yourself, do something to make his job easier.

    27. Being too afraid to guide your partner's hand when she?s touching you. Don't like the way she's doing it? Gently take her hand and show her how you like it.

    28. Getting into bed, getting naked, fooling around and then deciding that you just want to cuddle, then getting offended when she doesn't. It?s your choice to stop, but don't look all fucking surprised when she's confused. You got her naked in your bed, what else did you think was going to happen?

    29. Refusing to let her take control.

    30. Refusing to take control. It?s ok to crawl across a bed to her on all fours, push him down and crawl on top. It's not her responsibility to start things all the time.

    31. Forgetting that he has a body that likes to be touched, too. women have things like backs and shoulders and stomachs and other parts that are fun to kiss and touch. You miss a lot of good places by concentrating solely on her pussy.

    32. Leaving him to his own devices. Nothing is worse than a guy who gets you most of the way off and then bolts because he can?t be bothered.

    35. Refusing to try things in the name of "making love". You're not making anything. You are naked. With another person. Making strange faces and weird noises. Stop romanticizing it.

    37. Taking things way too seriously. Sex is funny. Actually it's hilarious. Somewhere along the line, someone is going to fall off of a bed, hit their head on a lighting fixture, accidentally kick a midget or trip over a goat. It's how you deal with it that really matters.

    38. Throwing a bitch fit when she asks for a 3 some. It?s the American dream. (I know my ex is reading this right now, so a quick interjection. One request for a 3 some is ok. Every 5 minutes, not so much. Know the difference).

    39. Continuing going down knowing that you have god awful cotton mouth. Really. Grab a bottle of water.

    40. Bitching when you get juices on you. You're having sex. That will happen. That?s the entire point of sex. Establish where she can and cant juices and be done with it. Remember, it tightens the pores.

    42. Not making any noises at all. Moan. Scream her name. Something so she knows she's the best you've had, even if she isn't.

    43. Faking orgasms. Just. Don't. By faking (IF she believes you) she thinks she's doing everything right. And if she doesn't know its not working, she's not going to change it. Starting a vicious cycle of unfulfilling sex which will eventually be very damaging to her ego.

    44. Not washing before sex. I know that sex is spontaneous, this is more of a general statement. If you haven't showered that day, and things smell sweaty perhaps demanding oral sex is a little ridiculous of you.

    45. Anything that involves inserting anything into her body that he has not specifically approved before hand. I don't care what FHM says, some things are simply not pleasant surprises.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i don't think this is just a mistake of women though. i can't sleep even with just an arm over me - i like to sleep 'alone'. in the same bed of course but not with any holding etc going on. it makes me feel restricted.

    Oh no, I didn't mean that all women love falling asleep in men's arms, while we find it uncomfortable. I just meant that it is uncomfortable for anyone. lol.
    I'm totally the same when it comes to sleeping 'alone' in bed though, without any holding e.t.c.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i don't think this is just a mistake of women though. i can't sleep even with just an arm over me - i like to sleep 'alone'. in the same bed of course but not with any holding etc going on. it makes me feel restricted.

    I'm the same.

    Well, not quite. I need room to move though. I get really hot and bothered really easily.

    I sleep weird in a bed when theres a boy in it. I sleep cuddling up to him with one leg over him and a arm. I'm strange. I can't have HIM cuddling me though. Not whilst I'm sleeping although I can if we are spooning but from my experience, guys take offence if I don't wanna face them!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lol.

    As somebody has already hinted at, things like this but written about men are usually seen as funny by both men and women, but as soon as the situation is reverted it all suddenly becomes very personal and offensive.

    Just a general observation :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The men one wasn't funny either :p.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I thought this was quite funny...

    Not hilarious, but it was clearly just messing about.
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