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Moving in with mates, change of heart

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
edited March 27 in Work & Study
Situation is, i agreed to move into a student house with 4 other mates.
They have decided they all like a certain house but the problem is, I dont.
None of my mates are from Nottingham whereas I am and they have picked a house in a pretty bad area which would mean we would have prostitutes and drug dealers hanging around right on our doorstep leaving us with no choice but to have to walk past them daily.
Now i would imagine if i dropped out it would make things pretty difficult for them to get that house (its actually a 6 bedroom but the landlord has agreed to let to just 5 people).
So....what to do?
I could quite easily get by living at home next year but i feel like i would be letting my friends down and putting them in the shit by not living with them. I dont fancy living in a slum with a high chance of getting mugged often either though.

:confused:
Post edited by JustV on

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think you would be letting yourself down if you didn't move out next year.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I wouldn't fork out the cash for somewhere that you don't want to live in and know is rough. You made your position clear and they didn't listen to the local. You owe em nowt.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Did you tell them that you didn't want to move in?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Have you explained your reasons for not wanting to live there to them? I'm sure they don't fancy getting mugged, raped and offered Crack either.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Is it a student area?

    At some point you are going to have to move out of home, and life will get less cushy, and you will need someone cheap, which tends to mean the less solubrius neighbourhoods.

    That said it's your money and your life so your call, you need to make the decision for you, not your mates.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Its just outside of a student area, ive expressed my concerns but i havent flat out said i dont want to live there either.
    When the guy was showing us around the house he actually said to us "if the girls that live here say anything bad about the place just ignore them because they're liars.." i mean wtf, thats not a good thing to hear is it!?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Not necessarily, but girls can bitch and moan something chronic.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Not necessarily, but girls can bitch and moan something chronic.

    i resent that comment!

    Icey- I would have made it clearer sooner. If you really don't want to live there however then don't. Maybe explain that you have a bad jist about the house and try and get them to continue looking for a house..otherwise you'll have to back out I guess.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sounds like Forest Fields in Nottingham! :D

    You have to do what is best for you. If you think you would be better living at home then go for it.

    Your mates can easily find someone else, (its not hard in Notts, loads of students)

    But dont let living in a ruff area put you off having a good time living with your mates. I missed out on a year living with my mates in Notts and would do anything to get that year back.

    Make your decission based on whats best for you and nobody else :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Calvin wrote: »
    Sounds like Forest Fields in Nottingham! :D
    Bang on mate :lol: Its quite out the way of all the other student houses though.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ha ha! it could only be Forest Fields:D

    Least you have to playing fields near by (but dont go after dark).

    If your sure you want to drop out, try putting some notices around uni etc, and see if you can get someone to replace you.

    But dont drop out just cos of the area. I was bricking it when i first arrived in Nottingham, (I hadnt seen a prostitute in my life until i moved to Notts) It really isnt as bad as it first seems :)

    Remember dont sweat the small stuff, just enjoy it while it lasts.

    All the best :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I didn't know that Nottingham is supposed to be so bad.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    pill 'ed wrote: »
    I didn't know that Nottingham is supposed to be so bad.


    Its got a bad reputation, but i have never had any problems in Notts.

    Im thinking of moving back there! Guess it just like any big city (but with more burglars)

    :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nottingham's a big place, a few rough areas with gun crime but it's got a lot of sweet areas too. I've lived in areas with hookers and drug dealers, never got any problems. They move in their own circles. But then I am street wise.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sorry if i've missed it but why did you agree to living somewhere you weren't happy with?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would go with your gut feeling mate, its normally right. If its a bad area explain to your mates, they will understand. I know finding a place in Nottigham can be hard, my friend recently has been looking and has only just got a place.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Why don't you tell them you don't like the house, or more to the point, the area it's in, and suggest to keep looking in other areas? Surely they'd be open to do that.

    I don't think you should think you should rule out living with friends when you haven't actually told them how you feel about this place.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Why don't you tell them you don't like the house, or more to the point, the area it's in, and suggest to keep looking in other areas? Surely they'd be open to do that.

    I don't think you should think you should rule out living with friends when you haven't actually told them how you feel about this place.
    :yes:

    Do a bit of a search yourself in the areas you like, find out when you're mates are free and book some viewings. Take the innitative.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    VinylVicky wrote: »
    Nottingham's a big place, a few rough areas with gun crime but it's got a lot of sweet areas too. I've lived in areas with hookers and drug dealers, never got any problems. They move in their own circles. But then I am street wise.

    Not neccesarily a bad thing having drug dealers around lol
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i think itll be quite a challenge to find a nice area for your house at student prices, but maybe anythings better than what you described.... my house is a shithole but the location is awesome :D

    If you're ready to leave and were really up for it before you found the house ure gonna live in then definately suggest to them to move elsewhere, you could miss out on some great times otherwise!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you told them your thought its not your job to move in wherever they want. You dont have to move where they say and everyone should have an input in the house. Like kermit said, you own them nothing.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hiya icey- I agree with Kermit and Jenni that although they are your friends you don't "owe," them anything. Don't get roped into staying somewhere that will make you miserable. It is however, your responsibility to speak up and let them know sharpish exactly why you are not happy and let them know that you don't want to move into this place. You don't want everyone to think you are fine with it- that's where a problem could arise, if you don't say something soon enough.

    Good luck with finding somewhere nicer.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I just found out there's a brothel at the bottom of our street, peelers are there flat out.

    Man, fat better craic in a student house, parties galore. Yip ya! :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fuck it, I'm just gonna live there anyway. Deal with any problems later :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    icey wrote: »
    Fuck it, I'm just gonna live there anyway. Deal with any problems later :thumb:

    Yeah I think I'd probably just move in anyway, I doubt it'll be that bad.

    Just carry a knife and some knuckle dusters on you at all times. :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    icey wrote: »
    Fuck it, I'm just gonna live there anyway. Deal with any problems later :thumb:

    Good choice. When i first saw the area i was a bit shocked. Prostitutes and dealers wasnt what i was used to.

    But once you live there you will reliase it isnt that bad. After all you will be living with mates and having a laugh. Thats the main thing :D

    In the four years i lived in the area, i never had any problems. Hope it all goes well mate :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    don't worry you'll be fine - just take precautions that you should normally take anyway e.g. keeping the front/back door locked at all times. we live near a bail hostel but the people we rent off failed to tell us this and we had people coming and looking in our windows.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    and try and avoid Forest Road West if you dont wanna see prostitutes :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    There are a few dodgy areas in nottingham but it's never bothered me that much, they move in their own circles anyway. I really wouldn't worry about it, they don't have much interest in students! Besdies, they'll be other students living nearby. I think it's better to live with friends than at home whilst your're at uni, think you made the right choice :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just move in and stop being a big girl.
    your a student, you'll be fine.
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