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One Night Stand 'Etiquette'
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
This is a bit random I realise, but basically...when you've had a one night stand...how do you tend to act with them.
I mean the other day I took a guy home, who I knew from my course I'd like to add, but not very closely or anything and it happened...and he ended up staying till 2 in the afternoon after that night, talking and kipping. Bearing in mind it was 5am by the time we'd got to mine having left at 2am and we'd gone to a park and talked on the swings as he's from a different country and is generally very interesting. But anyway yes. The thing is lying there I wondered, does everyone do this. I mean I curled right into him, he held me the whole night. In the morning there was more chat and cuddling into one another. But is that...what everyone does. 'Cause I know the guy, I'm not sure it counts as much because I'm more aware of being attracted to him from seeing him around and we had topics in common we could talk about.
But the scenario is : You pick up a random dude/dudette. When you wake up, do you stay? Do you cuddle up, are you affectionate, intimate, do you go cold, do you freeze up can't find a word to say to one another usually and bugger off.
I haven't the nerve for a random one night stand. But wondered how others respond in the situation?
I mean the other day I took a guy home, who I knew from my course I'd like to add, but not very closely or anything and it happened...and he ended up staying till 2 in the afternoon after that night, talking and kipping. Bearing in mind it was 5am by the time we'd got to mine having left at 2am and we'd gone to a park and talked on the swings as he's from a different country and is generally very interesting. But anyway yes. The thing is lying there I wondered, does everyone do this. I mean I curled right into him, he held me the whole night. In the morning there was more chat and cuddling into one another. But is that...what everyone does. 'Cause I know the guy, I'm not sure it counts as much because I'm more aware of being attracted to him from seeing him around and we had topics in common we could talk about.
But the scenario is : You pick up a random dude/dudette. When you wake up, do you stay? Do you cuddle up, are you affectionate, intimate, do you go cold, do you freeze up can't find a word to say to one another usually and bugger off.
I haven't the nerve for a random one night stand. But wondered how others respond in the situation?
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On holiday, I shagged one guy and we stayed up talking the entire morning (didn't get to his until 5am anyway) and then I went home, a kiss at the door and if I saw him whilst I was outwe ignored each other. The second guy I pulled I kind of "seen" him while I was there, we stayed with each other and enjoyed the banter with our friends etc but of course on holiday things are slightly skewed.
I would never kick someone out of my bed but if they were a random I picked up form the club or whatever I'd expect them to take the "wow Im tired.." hint and push off afterwards.
Although I'm also confused about this lately. With a guy I see on Occasions, He's always really loveable and snuggly, up until i leave... Like the following afternoon
doesn't sound like your usual one night stand malteser... You knew him beforehand, have affectionate feelings for him and enjoyed his company beforehand for hours. The only thing this has common with an 1n stand is the sex.
Do you want to see him again?
I would then, very 'cooly,' refuse to talk about it. Giving nothing away but a wink and a bit of laddish innuendo.
Actually I think it probably varies from person to person and situation to situation. But it doesn't sound like either of you intend it to be one night only.
I guess there's no real etiquette to it - you just have to monitor how the other person's behaving and try to make things as comfortable as possible...
Also, I hate laying around without having brushed my teeth/had a shower etc. Also depends how rough I feel...
I have certainly never left in the middle of the night, that's for sure.
He always cuddles up really tightly, with his legs wrapped round me, calls me babe and other pet names, put his hand on mine or holds it, strokes my arm..all the usual stuff that seems kind of 'coupley'.
But, it's just sex and he doesn't have any feelings for me so... *shrugs*
Alasia stated she had slept with her ex more than once. Lipsy was simply saying that it was not a one night stand. More of a "fuck buddy" which is true
No I agree, fi you've only slept with someone once then it is a ONS. But Alasia went out with her ex for 5 months and then carried on sleeping with him after they broke up.
A drunken pull is just that though, I'm no more likely to have anything in common with her than I would any other random in a club so that's why they end up as one nighters.
I was counting it as a similar kind of thing though; even though we cuddled up and did 'coupley' stuff afterwards, it was just sex and he didn't have any feelings for me.
Fuck Buddy or ONS, it's still just sex.
Yeah I know - Lipsy changed her post as I was replying (cheeky
I don't think that being cuddly and talking to your conquest is being coupley. Whilst you've gone on looks not personality, its nice to talk to who you've just shagged. Only good manners innit.
How else are they going to know you like your bacon crispy and would prefer your eggs scrambled???
Yeah but holding hands and wrapping round each other so tightly that the girl (me!) has trouble breathing? (I swear he was just trying to suffocate me) That's just weird. 'Just sex' should be just that; sex and nothing else, IMO. That's all I went round there for, after all.
Buit, can't speak for other people:)
It's hard to explain. It''s not suffocation in an s&m way!
He tends to wrap his whole body round me - our legs intertwined, both his arms round me, that kind of thing
I don't know what this is gonna escalate into because it's not what I would call a one night stand. It was just obscure going home with him, not regretful but as I've had part of my module with him I know of him though not closely so it wasn't so random. For the most part my question was more at random one night stands. Having never had that circumstance occur, I was wondering how people reacted in the morn and the closest situation I had to that was that experience!
Thanks for the replies guys, tis interesting!
Sunday. Bloody hell Alasia.
Just because your not getting any
Noooo!
a) because thats a fib
and b) because sunday, would be after saturday night and this thread
http://vbulletin.thesite.org/showthread.php?t=111635&page=3
:no: Oh dear. I remember the issue over all that now. Just forgot it was related to alasia.
Some people never learn BUT it's their choice and what can you do!