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Kids Say the Funniest Things . . .

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Inspired by something a little boy at nusery said today

Boy: I have a willy
Me: Yes you do
Boy: I guess that means you have a flower ashlee

:lol:

I was babysitting the other day and Millie has bought me a little box of chocs, she gave me them, went up behind me put her arms around my neck from the back, head of shoulder looked right into my eyes and said

"would you like to share them?"

Sure I will think of plenty more!

Comments

  • BunnieBunnie Posts: 6,099 Master Poster
    :lol: i love the second one. I love the things kids say, they can be so bloody cute at times
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I went to see a man about something before, Quite important, and my son decided to say to him, "Look at the state of your hair" :o
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My sister, aged about 3, in the supermarket:

    Places cucumber between legs.
    "LOOK I'VE GOT A WILLY JUST LIKE MY DADDY!"
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Little lad I know (when he was younger) used to be obsessed with police, fire, and more importantly pizza delivery guys and taxi drivers. Well he would see and asian guy and shout "Hey SAF CABS!" Which is the local taxi firm round him. Hence his mum went red, apologised and tried to explain yet again that not all asian men are taxi drivers!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When i asked my brother to get in the shower he said:

    'what's the point... I'm only gunna get dirty again'!!!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When i was doing work experience at a primary school...

    teacher (talking about meat to a class of 5 year olds): does anyone know what comes from a cow?
    kid: scrambled eggs
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ballerina wrote: »
    When i was doing work experience at a primary school...

    teacher (talking about meat to a class of 5 year olds): does anyone know what comes from a cow?
    kid: scrambled eggs

    :lol:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    We were singing a nursery rhyme today and they do actions too. The teacher was teaching them the rhymes, put her hand in the air, and pointed to her finger where she was wearing a ring, the rhyme went something like "I can't get married without a ring" and she said "I cant get married without a...." and pointed to the ring on her finger.

    A little lad shouted "A FINGER"
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Another one has just come to me...

    My friend said to this little boy:

    Friend: 'where's your mum'
    Boy: 'I haven't got a mum'

    My friend felt soo soo guilty, until the little lad said:

    'But i have got a mam'
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When I was little apparently I asked my auntie when the baby was coming. She wasn't pregnant :blush:
  • BunnieBunnie Posts: 6,099 Master Poster
    kangoo wrote: »
    When I was little apparently I asked my auntie when the baby was coming. She wasn't pregnant :blush:

    haha! I love it...bet secretly deep down she really dislikes you :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    At my checkout today, this little boy who was about 4 said to a man behind him waiting in the queue 'hello old man, do you need this bag?' and gave him a carrier bag.

    Thing was this man was only in his early thirties! haha! i was dying to laugh. I said 'oh thats nice, isnt it?' haha. he looked quite embarassed.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The little girl of friends of our family was asked by her teacher to write down what job her daddy did. Her teacher was a bit shocked to see that she had written 'PENIS' ... she didn't know how to spell 'PIANIST'.
  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    Teagan wrote: »
    The little girl of friends of our family was asked by her teacher to write down what job her daddy did. Her teacher was a bit shocked to see that she had written 'PENIS' ... she didn't know how to spell 'PIANIST'.
    :lol:

    I've said these before, but it's still funny.
    Policeman: Hi, what's your name?
    My nephew: <name>
    P: Nice! And you're going to school?
    N: What kind of a policeman are you, that you can't tell I'm of kindergarten age and not school?

    Also:
    My nephew, looking at a woman sitting next to him on the bus: Hi, are you a mum or a grandma?
    Woman: I'm a mum.
    N: (stares at her for a bit) I don't think so! You must be a grandma!
    (She was, btw :D)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    at sunday school the one day, a boy i look after was learning about the power and the glory, his conversation went like this:

    boy: what does power and glory mean?
    priest: power is everything god has like the lighting etc, and glory is the rainbows and everything he has made
    boy: well i think god has too much power coz sometimes people die!
    priest: i think you should go back to your nan now

    all this from a 5 yr old, i was nearly crying with laughter when his nan told me!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My little sister comes out with some beauties, but I really can't think of any right now :grump:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My boyfriend's niece is only a wee toddler and she goes around waving at spontaneous people and says 'CYA LATER'. It's so cute.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    At my sister's wedding, my youngest neice was sitting with her daddy, and my sister had just kissed her husband, and stella (the youngest) says "Daddy can we go now!?"

    Which was greeted with the congregation roaring with laughter, including the happy couple.
  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    Fiend_85 wrote: »
    At my sister's wedding, my youngest neice was sitting with her daddy, and my sister had just kissed her husband, and stella (the youngest) says "Daddy can we go now!?"

    Which was greeted with the congregation roaring with laughter, including the happy couple.
    Isn't that what everybody's thinking in weddings (apart from the couple, I guess)? Us grown-ups just don't say it, cause if we did, no one would laugh. :grump:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Isn't that what everybody's thinking in weddings (apart from the couple, I guess)? Us grown-ups just don't say it, cause if we did, no one would laugh. :grump:

    Probably a few glares really..
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hehe, my sister was two at my aunt's wedding, and she kept calling out my aunts name when she was trying to say her vows! "Hello Aunty Sarah! Hello Aunty Sarah!"
    My sister has said all sorts of hilarious stuff, but I can't remember much of it at the moment.
    Oh, there was one time when we were just chatting (she was about 3 ish) and she randomly came out with "Mummies wear nappies too". I obviously looked quite confused, and my Dad said he'd explain later. It turns out she'd discovered my stepmum's sanitary towels and telling her they were nappies was the only way my dad could get out of it!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It turns out she'd discovered my stepmum's sanitary towels and telling her they were nappies was the only way my dad could get out of it!

    HAHAHAHAHA!
  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    Another story:

    Kid is with his dad at a cafe. The dad gives him some money to pay for the things they ordered (considerably more money than they're worth) and bring back the change. The kid goes up to the till, gives the money and says "Keep the change" (because he'd heard it and it sounded cool).
    The dad had to go back and ask for the change. :lol:

    Any guesses on who it was who did that? :blush:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Another story:

    Kid is with his dad at a cafe. The dad gives him some money to pay for the things they ordered (considerably more money than they're worth) and bring back the change. The kid goes up to the till, gives the money and says "Keep the change" (because he'd heard it and it sounded cool).
    The dad had to go back and ask for the change. :lol:

    Any guesses on who it was who did that? :blush:

    You?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My cousin is two and a half, and is always around adult women gossiping!!!
    Whenever she's out and about and sees women, she'll say:

    'Iya duck, fancy poppin round for a cuppa'... Shes heard her mium say it so much its second nature to her. SO CUTE!!!
  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    Sofie wrote: »
    You?
    :D
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