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Inviting a guy to your place: how soon?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't think it's too early at all, I've done it before but then it's always been at my suggestion so obviously I'm going to be fine with it! I think it depends on what you think his intentions are (and what yours are :naughty:) and how comfortable you are about it. It sounds like you aren't particularly comfortable with the idea, and of course your happiness and safety are paramount. Do you live alone?

    Basically the rule of thumb I'd follow is that if you're hesitating about it then you're not ready to let him into your personal space yet, there's nothing weird about that on a second date (!!) - some people care more about their privacy than others! It's a wee bit cheeky of him to ask in my opinion, though I don't think it indicates anything dodgy (possibly more like he's chancing his arm, or maybe he is into interior design) but I myself would tend to go on the date first and then if I felt like having them back I would invite them. Rather than planning it all beforehand if you see what I mean. The heck with all this babbling anyway, if it doesn't sit well with you then don't do it. Just keep meeting him in neutral places until the time comes that you feel ready to club him over the head and drag him back to your lair ;) there is no pressure for that to be on the second date which I'm sure you already know.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    PussyKatty wrote:
    and also that he'd like to see my flat.

    that, to me, suggests he wants to take things to the next level!
    as briggi said, go on the date, and then see how you feel then!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    agree with lost+confused. if a lad said to be 'i'd like to see your flat' - i'd assume it meant something sinister. :p:D (though he might be into interior design?!).

    and no i don't think it's too early. i'd take someone to my house on a first date (and no not necessarily for that!). however if you're not comfortable with it then just make your excuses.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it is never too early to invite a guy back to ur place if ur happy with it. if ya aint dont invite him.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Tbh, if you are worrying about this then I wouldn't let him come in.

    I wouldn't say there is a definate time when you should and shouldn't invite a guy round.

    Tbh, it does sound as though he is expecting something if he is inviting himself round but thats me.

    You should wait until you feel 100% comfortable with the idea of it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lucifer devil wrote:
    agree with lost+confused. if a lad said to be 'i'd like to see your flat' - i'd assume it meant something sinister. :p:D (though he might be into interior design?!).

    Bwahaha... 'Can I come around to your place? I'd like to see your Vag...... e...tables, in your kitchen..."
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Pretty much agreed with everyone else. If you're questioning it, then you're obviously not comfortable with it yet, so give it a while. If he mentions it, make the old "what kind of girl do you think I am?" joke and have fun watching him backtrack and squirm a bit.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you think it's too personal too soon, then don't do it yet. It could be that he's interested in seeing your flat to find out more about you and what you like... then again it could just be his way of suggesting sex. You could always tell him he can see your flat but he can't stay the night because you've got to get up early the next day (or some other excuse), subtley suggesting that sex isn't on the menu.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    StrubbleS wrote:
    Bwahaha... 'Can I come around to your place? I'd like to see your Vag...... e...tables, in your kitchen..."
    :lol:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You could always get a mate or two over for the night so you aren't going back to an empty house if you do decide to go back? Even if they're in different rooms, it's safer.

    It's also a good excuse to stop him from staying the night.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Kate_342436 wrote:
    You could always get a mate or two over for the night so you aren't going back to an empty house if you do decide to go back? Even if they're in different rooms, it's safer.

    It's also a good excuse to stop him from staying the night.

    I don't have a spare room...well I have the living room but it's all open plan with no internal doors so don't think anyone would be happy with that..funny noises and all
    :blush:;)

    I'm gonna leave inviting him back until I feel more comfortable..or can't wait any longer!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well maybe see how your date goes. afterwards you might feel like you're more comfortable with the idea. :)
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