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Monkey

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in General Chat
If you had a Monkey what task would train it to do


I think I'd train mine to wash and then wax my car .. :yum:

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Why do you need a car if you live in London? :confused:
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    Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    Sit on my shoulder and not go away unless I tell him/her to.
    (Jealous of Ross's Marcel).
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'd train it to turn the telly over when i'm falling asleep so it doesn't blow up in the night.

    I'd also train it to tuck me in, fetch me food and drink and fluff my pillows. That'd make my bedtime so much easier.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'd train it to rob banks!
    Even Londoners like to get away from the city sometimes and train travel can work out too expensive for longer distances.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hoovering... I hate hoovering :(
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Probably clean out the cat poo.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    MONKEY!

    loada.jpg
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    *Snow White Queen* wrote:
    Why do you need a car if you live in London? :confused:


    I don't live in the city centre - about 15 miles away from it but it still comes under greater London. However if I was to drive those 15 miles it would take about 30 minutes if there was no speed cameras, 60 minutes with cameras and no traffic and in reality with cameras and London traffic about 2 hours.

    And usually when I drive I drive away from London. In fact I'm debating how to get to my own Birthday party on Saturday, cos it will be easy to get there by tube train and easy to get back by tube as well - assuming I wanna be in bed by midnight .. NOT

    Anyway you didn't say what you're monkey would do for you .. lol
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I wouldn't train it to do anything because it's fucking cruel, I'd rather have a pet person and train it to wipe my monkey's ass
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    VinylVicky wrote:
    I wouldn't train it to do anything because it's fucking cruel, I'd rather have a pet person and train it to wipe my monkey's ass


    Do you think training those monkeys that help people paralysed from the neck down is cruel as well?

    http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2004/05/20/1085028464555.html?from=storylhs

    http://www.helpinghandsmonkeys.org/

    http://www.helpinghandsmonkeys.org/images/gizmo.mov
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    DiamondGeezer wrote:
    Do you think training those monkeys that help people paralysed from the neck down is cruel as well?

    [/url]
    why did you ask that? surely you could tell I meant for pleasure?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Some people might think using animals for any purpose is cruel, i.e. Vegan's vs Vegetarians .. just double checking how extreme your views are.
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    Teh_GerbilTeh_Gerbil Posts: 13,332 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Kill.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Masturbate me.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    DiamondGeezer wrote:
    Some people might think using animals for any purpose is cruel, i.e. Vegan's vs Vegetarians .. just double checking how extreme your views are.
    Well I think personally that we should eat meat, it's in our nature but I can't stand the way animals are treated and I try my best to buy meat frm free range farms etc.
    My views and feelings arevery strong on this subject, I don't agree with hunting, blood sports or the fur trade either. I have no respect for people that agree with these things either!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    DiamondGeezer wrote:
    If you had a Monkey what task would train it to do


    God everything. Clean my room, do my assignments (I'd buy it the text books!), prepare my revision - hell it could do my exams if it liked!

    It'd also have to be able to make cups of tea. Maybe the odd packet of super noodles. Oh, and it'd have to enjoy watching Friends with me. I get lonely watching it now my mum and boyfriend both have jobs while it's on :(
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    VinylVicky wrote:
    Well I think personally that we should eat meat, it's in our nature but I can't stand the way animals are treated and I try my best to buy meat frm free range farms etc.
    My views and feelings arevery strong on this subject, I don't agree with hunting, blood sports or the fur trade either. I have no respect for people that agree with these things either!


    What about fishing?

    I'm no hunting fan, BUT if the people actually ate what they killed then at least that's something but certainly no fan of hunting foxes, etc

    Not sure if you agree with this method of raising cows but at least they get free beer

    http://www.luciesfarm.com/artman/publish/article_39.shtml
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    DiamondGeezer wrote:
    What about fishing?

    I'm no hunting fan, BUT if the people actually ate what they killed then at least that's something but certainly no fan of hunting foxes, etc

    Not sure if you agree with this method of raising cows but at least they get free beer

    http://www.luciesfarm.com/artman/publish/article_39.shtml
    If you are hunting to survive, then that's different. At least the animals haven't been poorly treated before they came to their end and we are carnivores after all. But animals used for sport and fun totally sickens me.
    I think I know what that link is but just in case it's upsetting, I won't read it it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Tickle my back lol
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    VinylVicky wrote:
    If you are hunting to survive, then that's different. At least the animals haven't been poorly treated before they came to their end and we are carnivores after all. But animals used for sport and fun totally sickens me.
    I think I know what that link is but just in case it's upsetting, I won't read it it.


    I don't think that link is upsetting

    Shows a man massaging a cow .. go read the full thing


    massage3.jpg
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Long long ago I had this horrible psycho nasty white trash bitch of a friend and she had a monkey. It was cute. It didn't eat bananas but loved bubble gum. It wore a diaper because their nasty family was too lazy to train it. It didn't do much but eat bugs.

    Very cute though. If I had a monkey I wouldn't make it work. It would be my friend. We would take walks together and hold hands.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would train him to do EVERYTHING :D
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