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Gender...
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Does anybody at times feel they were born in to the wrong body, or that their gender cannot be defined?
I know this sounds really wierd probably, but often I do, not only on a philosophical level but sometimes even on a deeper level. I mean at times I feel kind of womanly and soft and hey... I love kids and want to have them, but often I don't feel like a woman...
Or more, I recognise that my body is that of a woman, but I don't feel like I belong in this body often... That I should have a boy's body, or even an intersex/androgynous body.
Does this make sense or make me wierd or something?
I just don't see the importance of my gender, nor of the gender of other people... Anyone relate?
I know this sounds really wierd probably, but often I do, not only on a philosophical level but sometimes even on a deeper level. I mean at times I feel kind of womanly and soft and hey... I love kids and want to have them, but often I don't feel like a woman...
Or more, I recognise that my body is that of a woman, but I don't feel like I belong in this body often... That I should have a boy's body, or even an intersex/androgynous body.
Does this make sense or make me wierd or something?
I just don't see the importance of my gender, nor of the gender of other people... Anyone relate?
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I burp, fart and scratch my nuts in public frequently, and I have a bad mouth if something is not working out as I expected...
...usually no features you'll find in your everyday girl.
The way you feel and who YOU are, is just YOU. Even if it wasnt normal, you still have to accept yourself. If you identify as a human being first and foremost rather than a woman, then thats right and good, but I dont know the extent to which you mean it (if that makes sense?)
Yeah, I suppose it depends how deeply you feel about it. You get loads of tomboys and quite effeminate guys, but if you're really sure that there's something seriously wrong then I guess it'd be a lot deeper than that.
I don't really like beer and I don't have the slightet bit of macho-ness in me so I'm not an alpha male. If you pushed me I'd say I'm a bit of the girly side, I'm so soppy and I've got all these dreams about stuff. Hard to explain.
I think sometimes once you're in a good place and you can accept yourself then you just whack on with things.
http://folk.uio.no/thomas/gnd/androgyny.html
Is it your actual body that doesn't feel right or are you feeling like your mind doesn't match with being a girl?
One person once told me tha because my father wasn't really around much when I was a kid, I hadn't developed properly as a woman and had got too butch to compensate. Don't like her a lot.
It isn't something that worries me (some days it does) I just wonder if anybody feels the same... Like theydon't belong as a man or a woman, or don't see how their physical gender is in line with their mental gender.
That maybe gender is something which transcends our physical bodies.
only a thought.
Maybe you're just not in tune with yourself and just don't know who you are yet. There are so many stereotypes on how certain people have to be a certain way. Learning to accept yourself for who you are and being happy with it is the key to inner piece.
There are no set rules that just because your body is female that you have to act and feel like the stereotypical woman.
That should sound pretty weird too... ^^.
I don't have much of a girly side, then again I don't walk around like I own the world and am the alpha male. Just a typical bloke I guess.
Sometimes, these children are operated on at birth if the doctors decide (guess) that the baby appears to have a female or male inclination and the genitals are modified accordingly. In many cases though, a modified 'girl' grows up with feelings for other women and modified 'boys' grow up feeling something for other men. It seems in these cases, the doctors have made the wrong decision and the psychological makeup of the child was in fact the opposite to the physical modification they performed on the child. So even though, for instance, a child may be brought up as a girl with girls toys etc, the 'nature' side of the brain kicks in at puberty (if not before) and overrides the 'nurture' side.
I do, therefore, feel that it is possible to have the external features of one sex but internally be the other ... nature does not always make humans to a perfect template and this is what makes humans al the more interesting.
You're absolutely right (although you missed a zero). There are at least 70 variations within Intersex alone.
I also have a friend who is a very masculin woman, she doesnt just look it, its in her personality as well, she doesnt feel like what we are told women are supposed to be like, and really like it when in the pub one day someone thought she was a man,though sometimes shes still very girly (wanting to get married and have kids for example) i think maybe she feels the same way as you although ive never spoken to her about it.
i dont think its really a very rare thing anymore to feel that you dont fit into either sex i think like the others have said that theres deffinatly more than 2 sexes these days.