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4yr old with depression

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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    all this only started when she couldnt go the school she wanted

    which suggests she`s being a brat

    if they just sent her to school, she would settle down in a few weeks, but they aint even tried that, they just label her as having depression and keep her home
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Littleali wrote:
    all this only started when she couldnt go the school she wanted

    which suggests she`s being a brat

    if they just sent her to school, she would settle down in a few weeks, but they aint even tried that, they just label her as having depression and keep her home

    How do you know they haven't tried that? It's November now, that child could have been throwing up everyday since the beginning of September. That's quite a long time to watch your child be ill for, you're telling me, after 8 weeks, you'd still send your puking four-year old to school every day? =/
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ^_^ wrote:
    I'm not saying you need the knowledge to debate. I'm saying you have no right to say things like "She is not depressed." Or to insinuate that the doctor is completely wrong...

    Debating is about looking at both sides of the story. People shouldn't be so quick to judge. You're mostly saying that the doctor is wrong and that you are all right. Only because you think depression is an adult illness. You're closing the doors without looking behind them.

    Erm why you talking out of your arse? We're giving our opinions, not definite statements. Try reading the thread again.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ^_^ wrote:
    How do you know they haven't tried that? It's November now, that child could have been throwing up everyday since the beginning of September. That's quite a long time to watch your child be ill for, you're telling me, after 8 weeks, you'd still send your puking four-year old to school every day? =/
    yes
    thats what happened with me
    she doesnt like going? tough....she has to learn, we all gotta do things we dont like

    i spent years in clothes from the "spare clothes" box because i would throw up on myself so i could go home
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What? There's no need to be a cunt. I'm giving my opinion too, and that's welcomed in debate topics, right?

    "She's just feeling really low because she can't see her mates, she's grown a bond with them as lots of young people do in their early years and now this affects that bond, it doesn't mean that she is now depressed and needs medication."

    That sounds pretty definite to me.

    "She isn't depressed, she's unhappy about not being able to be with her friends."

    As does that.

    If you can't debate without swearing at people, don't debate at all. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Littleali wrote:
    yes
    thats what happened with me
    she doesnt like going? tough....she has to learn, we all gotta do things we dont like

    i spent years in clothes from the "spare clothes" box because i would throw up on myself so i could go home

    Yah, but that's you. and YOUR parents. What worked for you might not work for that little girl...

    I'm not saying they're right to take her out of school, perhaps they could have stuck with it longer, but at the end of the day, you don't know how long or how hard they've tried. I don't think I could watch my kid be sick every day.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ^_^ wrote:
    What? There's no need to be a cunt. I'm giving my opinion too, and that's welcomed in debate topics, right?

    "She's just feeling really low because she can't see her mates, she's grown a bond with them as lots of young people do in their early years and now this affects that bond, it doesn't mean that she is now depressed and needs medication."

    That sounds pretty definite to me.

    "She isn't depressed, she's unhappy about not being able to be with her friends."

    As does that.

    If you can't debate without swearing at people, don't debate at all. :)

    :banghead:

    If you read my first post you'll see I've already said it is my opinion. I don't have to say "I think" or "it is my opinion" everytime I have one. Catch a grip of yourself you intolerable dipsomaniac.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ^_^ wrote:
    Yah, but that's you. and YOUR parents. What worked for you might not work for that little girl...

    I'm not saying they're right to take her out of school, perhaps they could have stuck with it longer, but at the end of the day, you don't know how long or how hard they've tried. I don't think I could watch my kid be sick every day.
    so what are they gonna do?

    keep her out of school forever because she doesnt know the other kids?

    the longer they have her out of school, the harder it`ll be to get her to go back in because she`s so used to being at home with mummy

    and as for your information, it didnt work, i cried n barfed almost right up until i left high school

    but i STILL had to go
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Littleali, I see where you're coming from but I think your attitude towards the situation is a little harsh and unbending - neither of which are usually sensible or successful tactics when dealing with very small children (which she is, and I think a lot of people are forgetting/ignoring). I was miserable when I first went to primary school, having been taught by my mother in nursery school and not only detached suddenly from her in the school environment but also apart from all my friends due to a house move. I eventually settled, but having gone through that turmoil - and that is how it feels as a young child with little understanding of education systems and cut-off dates for applications - I would brave hell or high water to make any educational changes that would stop my kids being miserable in school.

    The other thing is, of course, that children and adults alike cope differently and are able to cope with different levels of stress and being unsettled. While most kids would just buckle down and get on with it, some can't/won't/both.

    I don't think it's as straightforward as brattish behaviour, really.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yerascrote, chill out, I wasn't talking JUST about you. Of course you don't have to state that it is your opinion everytime you speak (type?), I just didn't think many people in this thread were being very open-minded, that is ALL I was trying to say. You need to relax, it's JUST a debate forum. ;)

    and LittleAli, I dunno what they'll do. I guess they'll have to send her to school eventually, but I don't know, perhaps they'll try counselling? Fook knows, but you're right, the kid DOES have to go to school, sooner rather than later.

    and about your barfing, did you see a counsillor or anything? Cause it's kinda bad that you had to go through that for so long O_O
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well thats your opinion

    i dont think its harsh at all, she has been unsettled, lots of kids go through it, including me

    taking her out of school is not the way to go
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ^_^ wrote:
    and about your barfing, did you see a counsillor or anything? Cause it's kinda bad that you had to go through that for so long O_O
    nope

    i cried and threw up from nursery all the way up to year 8 of high school

    i went through it, and i`m here to tell the tale, i wasnt molly coddled (sp) or taken out of school because school is somewhere i had to go
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Of course it's my opinion (on your opinion ;)).

    I just don't think the psychology of throwing them in at the deep end and letting them get on with it works for every child, by any stretch of the imagination. I think it might even have adverse effects on some. It certainly won't help to foster an understanding attitude to other people's problems and unwillingness to do things, which I personally feel it is important to have.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yah but now your memories of school are mostly bad, right?

    Maybe if you or your parents had tried some different methods to make you happier, OTHER THAN taking you out of school, you woulda had a better experience?

    Idk, I mostly liked school. I just know I wouldn't have liked hating it. Well duh, but you get me. I would've wanted to make it better.

    Maybe you're one of those people that "just get on with things." I'm not though :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    briggi wrote:
    Of course it's my opinion (on your opinion ;)).

    I just don't think the psychology of throwing them in at the deep end and letting them get on with it works for every child, by any stretch of the imagination. I think it might even have adverse effects on some. It certainly won't help to foster an understanding attitude to other people's problems and unwillingness to do things, which I personally feel it is important to have.
    i`m not saying to throw her in at the deep end

    but as i keep saying, keepin her home wont solve anything, in my opinion it`ll make her worse

    maybe they should send her in half days, or let her mum go in a couple of days a week

    all in all, i really dont think she has depression, she`s going what most kids go through when they start a new school, its a big change, we all had to do it
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ^_^ wrote:
    Yah but now your memories of school are mostly bad, right?

    Maybe if you or your parents had tried some different methods to make you happier, OTHER THAN taking you out of school, you woulda had a better experience?
    not really, whilst i cried goin in every day, i was usually fine by lunch, it was just the whole process of gettin n there and getting settled in that bothered me

    once i was there and knew i had to stay there, i dealt with it
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Littleali wrote:
    i`m not saying to throw her in at the deep end

    but as i keep saying, keepin her home wont solve anything, in my opinion it`ll make her worse

    maybe they should send her in half days, or let her mum go in a couple of days a week

    all in all, i really dont think she has depression, she`s going what most kids go through when they start a new school, its a big change, we all had to do it

    I think maybe (s)he misunderstood your point. I also thought you meant just send her to school, but half days/mum going in sounds like a good idea.

    Then again, might just unsettle her more when they try cutting down the mum visits and increasing the half days to full days :p

    Kids are so difficult sometimes :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Littleali wrote:

    all in all, i really dont think she has depression, she`s going what most kids go through when they start a new school, its a big change, we all had to do it

    Only, we don't have to go to school. Only if a child is registered at a school do they have to go to one. Take them off the register and they can stay home. Seems to me that (as one possiblilty), this kiddy has realised that she can act a certain way and get to stay home, and stay with mummy too. aslong as it continues to work, then she'll continue to do it. Of course, I could be wrong, she could be depressed, but then, even if she is what is the solution and what is the desired outcome? I assume the desired outcome for her parents is for her to go to school, so she shouuld go to school.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey Laura !!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    katralla wrote:
    Seems to me that (as one possiblilty), this kiddy has realised that she can act a certain way and get to stay home, and stay with mummy too. aslong as it continues to work, then she'll continue to do it. Of course, I could be wrong, she could be depressed, but then, even if she is what is the solution and what is the desired outcome? I assume the desired outcome for her parents is for her to go to school, so she shouuld go to school.

    yes, thats what i`ve been saying ......
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    HEY RACH :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think Laura is right in that a lot of people are quick to make statements about something that they know little or nothing about. Who says that children's brains aren't developed enough to suffer mental disorders? That's a complete load of crap. They don't suffer them in the same way as adults but it isn't impossible. Children suffereing from mental disorders often respond well to small courses of (non-pharmacological) treatment so in this case it probably would be best to remove her from school until an appropriate course of action is decided on. Just because she has been found to be showing depressive symptoms doesn't mean that the problem can't easily be solved. Maybe she is being slightly brattish in wanting to go to a different school but she's probably worked it up into such a big deal and just needs a little help to get through it. Although I still think it sounds like anxiety which is extremely common in children and is mostly easily treated.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ^_^ wrote:
    increasing the half days to full days

    For ome weird reason, the first 6 weeks of primary school first year are half days, which is stupid when quite a few kids are used to going to nursery for full day.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    this forums good stuff
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