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Her internet obsession

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I met a girl on the internet and we've been together over a year now, when I first met her the internet community we met through mostly described her as a slut, however I don't think this is the case, she's had a difficult life and been used a lot, she also has an unusual turn on which involves women getting used.

Recently she's told me loads of lies including the fact she fancies people on the internet, flirts with people on the internet, shows her body to people on the internet on a pervert "request a girl to do something and she'll do it" style chatroom and even met up with a guy on the internet! The bloke who texts and talks to her now is twice her age and it looks like he encourages her to take her clothes off and also sends her dirty texts, although I'm not sure about either of these. I've been trying to look for situations where she's lied, so am I a victim of my own paranoia?

I suppose the best question is, is there anything I can do about this? I really don't want to dump her and I wan't her to feel untrusted I'm ok with her doing everything but flashing her body to 200+ people, I'm hoping she's stopped now but should I make sure or am I just feeding my paranoia? Today I caught her in this perverted chatroom, she wasn't flashing but later when I spoke to her she said she didn't go in the room.

I'm sure most people will go "dump the slut find someone new" but I do kind of think we need eachother to some degree and I think she does these things for reasons and it's not entirely related to our relationship. I also think if I make an accusation, such as "your still going in that pervy old man obseseed chatroom" I'll get dumped.

Thanks for any advice

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i coudlnt help noticing that you never said that you have met up in person, have you?

    regards
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah, ofcourse. We met through the internet but besides that we have a completely normal albeit long distance relationship. I see her about 4 days a week.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Girls can be untrustowrthy, as can men. They can lie to hurt you and it can hurt a lot.. As i found out. You need to ask yourself, not her, if you trust her. If you do, then trust her to talk about these issues with her. If she doesn't want to talk to you about them then maybe your trust was misplaced.

    It's not usual for a girl who's in a relationship to flash on the internet and stuff, but I fear she might be. Just from experience. But you deal with it how you think appropriate; but dont be afraid to walk away if needs be.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You seem very concerned that confronting her with this will get you dumped. Get things in some perspective (if she is doing these things you claim) then it should be you dumping her.

    Have you got any evidence of what she's up to? Emails or txts? Acting strangely overly protective about her email account or mobile phone? Generally, I've found instinct about these things proves to be correct. People make subtle clues which they find hard to hide.

    Secondly, it sounds like you will let her get away with anything. Whatever reason you have, it's too weak... Saying to yourself, but she's so beautiful, sexy, intelligent, etc seems exceeding needy and desperation. Don't justify these things in your mind.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh fuck, trust me mate, it's not worth half the bother. You'll end up screwing your mind thinking about what she's getting up to. Plus long distant relationships don't tend to work out in the long run.

    Oh and yeh, it's not like I'm obssessed with the internet, I mean this is only my 230th consectutive hour on this thing without sleep. Must stay on....internet.....agh!
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