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Tell him or not?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hello everyone! As you can see this is my first post here but I am really needing some advice so any help you guys can give me would be great...
This past summer I met a great guy in my home town in the States. I had just gotten out of relationship and wasn't looking to date anyone and we also knew the other main problem was that this year I am studying abroad in the UK. We kept our relationship on a friendship level until three weeks before I left when the inevitable happened and we kissed. The next three weeks were wonderful. We spent all our time together and I found myself telling him things I've never told anyone before and trusting him completely.
We talked about what we would do when I left town (since we won't see each other for 9 months) and decided to let it be what it decides to be and not pressure our relationship by imposing any labels on it- and make sure that we were honest with each other if our feelings changed.
So I get to the UK and during my second week here I end up kissing this guy on my hall. Nothing else happens, but I feel terrible about it. In fact, the only thing that it made me realize was that what my boyfriend and I have is very special and that it is worth waiting the year to see him again. I was going to tell him about it right away but my friends here told me not to. They said that it wasn't going to help him or our relationship since I realized it was a mistake and that all it would do is serve to ease my guilty conscious. This was a couple weeks ago now and I just can't help thinking that I should have told him when it happened. I still want to tell him but since over a month has passed since it feels weird to bring it up.
So what are your opinions? Should I tell him or not???

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It was a harmless snog that meant nothing and you've got no intentions of repeating it with anyone else so DON'T TELL HIM. Put it out of your mind and forget it ever happened.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if ur feelings havent changed then i wouldnt tell him. It must be very hard to be in a relationship and so far away from thje one u love so ur bound to get a bit lonely sometimes. If a harmless snog happens (as it did) and u felt so bad afterwards then it shows u have something quite special.dont worry about it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    All right, well it seems that so far everyone seems to think that honesty is in this case not the best policy... but I do have a follow-up question for everyone then:

    If it was your girlfriend or boyfriend that cheated on you, even if it was "harmless" and didn't mean anything, would you want to know?

    Just curious. Personally I can't decide... but maybe that's just me.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    By telling him about that all you are doing is dumping the guilt on him. Instead of dealing with it yourself so that you dont do it again, youre just letting him have to deal with it. Selfish.

    Of course, if youd shagged someone you shouldnt, that might be slightly different...

    It matters not who won or lost, but how you place the blame.
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