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You find out that he's a virgin, how do you react?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
as the title says basically. to but it simply i am 21 and a virgin. i'm not really that bothered about it, as most guys would be, but it does concern that i may one day have to tell my girlfriend (if i had one!).

when would be a good time tell? early on? certainly before you actually have sex though, yes?

i'm really confused about this one, let me know your thoughts, and thanks so much in advance.

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    JsTJsT Posts: 18,268 Skive's The Limit
    If she was that good a girlfriend it wouldn't matter.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i'd say tell her before you have sex, yeh. don't worry about it though, seriously!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think it would be a little more interesting if you kept it to yourself to be honest.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    JsT wrote:
    If she was that good a girlfriend it wouldn't matter.

    Indeed.

    I'd say certainly before you have sex, but not on the first date or anything like that.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you should tell the girl before you have sex. if it was me i would want to know because then we could talk about it. apart from the fact that i'm quite nosey its quite important because when i sleep with a guy i have high expectations of his performance so i would be more sympathetic to him being nervous etc. i think i would also be secretly chuffed to be taking his virginity! i would be able to wow him with all my experience hehe
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You don't HAVE to tell her, because she might not be able to tell (some people are just naturally gifted in the bedroom department! :D ), but I'd recommend it. Do it when you feel comfortable with her - that's assuming you're in a relationship with her at the time; if it's a one night stand it's probably best not to mention you're a virgin, could be a bit of a passion killer!

    And I agree with Lipsy; I'd be secretly pleased that I'm taking his virginity!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    .
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    the night and i wrote:
    You find out that he's a virgin, how do you react?

    I'd deflower him,and do it good!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would love it to be honest. :yippe:

    I'd like to teach him the ways of a woman!

    Don't tell her too soon but do tell her before sex, so she can give you a helping hand!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Really the only reason you're telling her is so that she can be gentle with you (hehe, or not...depending on what you're into!), and make allowances - women can be harsh and if you're not 'up to it' in the bedroom, she'll most likely cut her losses and leave - as harsh as that sounds. This is the beginning of a relationship I'm talking about btw, if she loves you she can forgive a bit of less-than-perfect bedroom action, but not too much ;)

    If you let her know you're a virgin, she can play teacher - and that's always fun :D;)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    tbh i didnt tell the girl when i lost mine, not at first anyway.
    We were going at it for a bit and she said something along the lines of 'ooo i can tell you've done this before' and i was like 'erm..no actually'
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sophia wrote:
    I can honestly say that she won't give a shit though, or at least, I wouldn't give a shit. Personally I'd much rather hear that my boyfriend was a virgin than that he had slept with hundreds and hundreds of women, and I certainly wouldn't think any the less of him for it. Honesty is pretty much always the best policy in situations like this though, I think :)

    :yes:

    My other half was a virgin when I met him, and it was never a big deal. Although for the record, if he hadn't have told me, I wouldn't have known. To be honest most blokes these days have watched porn prior to popping their cherry, so they're going to know what to do.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It wouldnt make any difference to me whatsoever. I think i'd quite enjoy it actually :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It wouldn't bother me at all, one of my ex's was a virgin and i'm glad he told me because it meant i could make it a little bit more special.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yeah im with most of the girlies here-
    dont tell too early dont tell too late, as long as youre not bothered she shouldnt be
    and it would be great fun to teach an untainted man what women like..
    plus in a sort of feminist, independant-women new-generation sort of way it would be a very liberating feeling taking a mans virginity!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I didn't tell my first girlfriend at first and despite having mulitple previous partners she was neither bothered and secretly quiet happy she was my first as I couldn't tell if she was crap which I now know she was. I should of told her before but unless you know she knows what she is doing you have no need to say unless you have problems. But if you are a proper couple it would never matter
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    bunglenutter wrote:
    She might go into the business thinking you might be a dab hand at the old whatchamacallit. 5 seconds post-entry, she'll be ultimately disappointed.

    Definitely not something unique to inexperienced men, by the way.

    :thumb:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Tell her when you're about to get down to it, and don't worry about it.

    Most girls I know prefer it- you have no previous, which means you don't persevere with a crap technique because your ex loved it. They can teach you to do them just how they want- sounds ideal to me.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    as it as been said, any sensible woman would not care about that...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you guys have taken such a big stress from my mind, and i love every single one of you for it. :heart:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you guys have taken such a big stress from my mind, and i love every single one of you for it.

    *giggles* the night and i luvs me! *blush* :p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    katralla wrote:
    I'd deflower him,and do it good!

    haha yeah!

    i wudnt mind - its might be a nice feeling actually he chose me to loose it to - if we were in a realtionship lol

    and yeah jut because ur a virgin doesnt mean ur gna b bad at it, mayb at first a little uncertain and nervous, but not for long
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