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People constantly letting you down last minute

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
This weekend I was meant to be having a friend come to stay and we had all stuff planned, was looking forward to it as haven't done much lately. Have sorted my flat out so there was space and it was clean and didn't stay out too late/get drunk last night so I could be up early today.

First thing this morning I get a text saying she isn't coming. This is not the first time she has done this.

The thing is, I feel like quite a few of my friends cancel on me last minute, saying they're tired/have to work/ill. I can understand it occasionally but it never seems to happen to anyone else.

Just having a grumble really. Do you have friends that cancel on you and does it piddle you off majorly?

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yup and yup. I have learnt to expect it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have one friend who does it, I dont bother making plans with her anymore.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Glittery wrote:
    I have one friend who does it, I dont bother making plans with her anymore.

    Exactly. I've had a few friends and i've learnt my lesson so don't bother to ask them to anything. With them it's been more of a 'keeping their options open' kinda thing, in case a better offer comes up.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    best thing to do is just whine at them till they change their mind :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm usually the let down but I always make it up and its always genuine. I have a terrible memory and forget plans ive already made, my friends know what im like tho
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've got nothing to do for the whole weekend now. How cack.

    Might go out tonight but I only know one of the people going and I always feel a bit awkward when there's loads of people I don't know.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    PussyKatty wrote:
    Might go out tonight but I only know one of the people going and I always feel a bit awkward when there's loads of people I don't know.
    but thats how you make new friends!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I had a friend at school who was always doing that to me :(

    I also have a friend who does it now, but I have learnt to rise above it. I also notice she does it to a lot of people, so I know it's not just me!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ive had plenty of friends like that, and i dont bother with any of them anymore.
    It tends to mean they have no respect for you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I just ditch friends who do that all the time. But I've got plenty of friends who are late all the time. They're easy to deal with, you just tell them you're meeting 1/2 an hour before you actually are. But that's not as bad. It's not as if they don't care, they're just not very good at time-keeping. Plus I hate people that start calling you and texting you when you're five minutes late anyway. Relax for fucks sake.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It tends to mean they have no respect for you.
    or are poeple pleasers and have no confidance to say No to you in the first place. they go along with whatever; then they start thinking how to get out of it so make some excuse about not turning up. yes. it is annoying.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    PussyKatty wrote:
    This weekend I was meant to be having a friend come to stay and we had all stuff planned, was looking forward to it as haven't done much lately. Have sorted my flat out so there was space and it was clean and didn't stay out too late/get drunk last night so I could be up early today.

    First thing this morning I get a text saying she isn't coming. This is not the first time she has done this.

    The thing is, I feel like quite a few of my friends cancel on me last minute, saying they're tired/have to work/ill. I can understand it occasionally but it never seems to happen to anyone else.

    Just having a grumble really. Do you have friends that cancel on you and does it piddle you off majorly?

    I did it once, because I was about to go out, but facing horrible diarrhea. That's a good excuse. I hate it if people leave me down with no reasonable... erm reason.

    If it happens 2-3 times, with a "I am tired" or "My boyfriend phoned me, to tell me he has time tonight", I wouldn't bother much with this person anymore.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My ex used to do this all the time, change his mind, not phone me when he said he would, whine at me until I agreed to go out with him etc, never go to the pub unless we could go to the casino afterwards (I put a stop to that quite quickly). Once or twice if fair enough but it was taking the piss teh bit. Best thing to do is say you how you had things planned for you etc and could you please give you a bit more notice in future. You have to ask yourself if they are really worth the hassle?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    This makes me absolutely wild, and with some people you can anticipate they'll do it, so I don't bother inviting them to things anymore. I find it so rude if people are late for no valid reason; "it was just 10 minutes" is not good enough.
    I def have one friend like this, who tries to keep everyone happy, does care but is so rubbish at time-keeping she'd be late for her own funeral. I just arrange a time earlier than I really mean, but she's catching on!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've had one person do this to me, however it was much more than 'I/We just don't want to go'. He did give me a decent enough reason.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have one friend who has been doing this a lot lately. I was complaining to another friend about this and they said why dont I tell her how much it annoys me - so i did, she apologised, then just carried on doing it.
    now i have had enough and I'm not going to struggle to arrange to do things with her, if she wants to spend time with me, she can organise it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've had that a few times recently, and while once I will forgive it, but only the once.

    Close friends don't do that, and whilst its a bit shite to be valued so little, at least you know where you stand.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it pisses me off when people do that because i might have prepared or done something based on the assumption that you are doing something and then they let you down. Im an organised person and rarely do that unless it is a fabulous excuse, though when they do let me down my friends usually have at least a half decent excuse i guess
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Come to think of it, no, hardly ever happens to me. And when it does, I can always ring other people to see what's happening. If a friend constantly did that to me I would be really annoyed, if she does it again just stop talking to her. Simple as.
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