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Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hiya, my problem is quite long and boring, but i do really need some help. on 2 issues really.

it involves my best friend, we have been the closest friends you could ever imagine for almost 2 years now, and recently she told me she's bi and i told her im gay. She has been very open about her sexuality but im havin a very difficult time with it.
almost a year ago my best friend jess, started going out with a boy, and over time they've got really really close, over the past 6 weeks they have been together literally 24/7. ive been feeling really quite left out because of this but it just feels like shes not interested anymore, the thing is i cant talk to anyone else about my sexuality and its been so hard recently coming to terms with it. So i would rely on her to talk to, but he's always there, and what makes it worse is he's a brilliant friend too.

when i try to talk to her about us drifting apart she just dismisses it or say things like "things are different now, there are more people around us."
Its not like she ignore me or anything its just that she doesnt seem interested at all. i know its not very wise to keep hanging around her if she doesnt want to see me, but i really need her to talk to, i cant tell anyone else, i just dont feel ready and there isnt anyone else i trust as much as i trust her.

i've tryed confroting her about it as ive said but it just doesnt go anywhere. and the thing is, i could make a huge fuss about it all but i think i might loose her completely if i do and i couldnt stand that. she might not care or use it as an opportunity to get away from me.

2nd thing is i fancy a boy sooooo much, he's like perfect and really really good looking, hes a friend of mine but i havent seen him since jess snogged him knowing i fancy him, but she was sooooooooo pissed so ive forgiven her for that.

please give me your advise, jess has gone on holiday and i want to know how to act when she gets back

thank you

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It seems to me that you are jealous of all the time your friend is spending with this new boyfriend. This is natural enough, but, could I just ask... how do you really feel about her? You make it seem as though you miss her advice and friendship, but do you think that a part of you fancies her? I kinda get the impression that you are jealous for her affections too. Hm?

    I don't really see what you can do, be honest with your friend and tell her you need some of her time too. Try to make other close friends, it's hard to rely on one person all the time. Be honest with yourself too, how do you feel? Try to be fair and understand your friends situations and desires.

    Remember, if this relationship doesn't work out you will still need to be there for your friend. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt; Hope I helped.

    [This message has been edited by Captain Kirk (edited 31-08-2001).]
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    um this is a tricky one my bestest mate a male me being female i used to be with him most of the day and sum times in the evening he was well still is my bestest mate hes the only one i can speak to really i mean i have other friends but not as good as him! anyways when he met sum one i felt so um how can i put this hurt in a way but he always calls me everyday still even though we havent seen each other for four months but im sure if you said to your friend u needed her undevided attention even if its just for one night im sure she can pull herself away from her man! just say u you would really like to see her alone u need to do this or it will just get worse! but as another poster has said u need to speak with other friends too they in a way can probly help!

    hope ive helped!


    standing on the corner the world moves in slow motion!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thanx for ur replys, and to answer you questions i am jelious of the love she has with her boyfriend but no, i can honestly say i dont like her in that way. but i do love her, with my whole heart, just theres nno sexual attraction.
    also ive tryed asking her to spend some alone time with me, i even prepared a picnic, but then she bought her boyfriend.

    thanx n e way
    loads of love
    S
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