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hes ignoring me

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
me and my boyfriend had a bit of a falling out, because of me, on friday but we were fine at the end of the night.

he went out last nite i text him to see how he was before he went because i didnt want to interrupt when he was with his friends and he didnt text me back till 2 then iv text him abit today an hes text back twice but now hes not texting back or answering his phone.

its not like him at all and if it wasnt for the fact of things not being right since friday i wouldnt be bothered but i am. dont know what to do

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just leave him he might be at work or phone problems. But dont start thinking about it to much, caues you will just worry more over something that could be so small.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just leave it for a little while. Every time you call or text to no response you're going to work yourself up that little bit more - and possibly annoy him a bit if he just wants a bit of downtime to recover from his night out and chill.

    I've spent anxious hours in the past wondering what's going on in a bloke's head and why he isn't texting or answering his phone... the solution is to busy yourself with something else and wait for him to get over his hangover or his grouchy mood and contact you. I promise you he will do so and you'll be glad you didn't keep on haranguing him as you'll feel a bit foolish -- I'm not trying to be harsh, just speaking from experience :)

    If you don't hear from him tonight then maybe give him a bell in the morning, we all need a bit of space sometimes and maybe this is one of those times for him. Try not to worry about it sweetheart, I'm sure he's not playing games or anything like that. Just seemingly impossible for women and men to understand one another's mindset when it comes to contact etc, I'm sure he doesn't think you'll be bothered - especially since he HAS been in contact just not as much as you'd like - just chill :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hes not at work, msy be phone problems but ive rang him and its gone through fine hes just not answering, just doesnt want to speak to me which to be fair is fine, everyone needs their space, just i dunno, i get worried thats all, ive been treated very badly in the past, mainly cheating and this is how it started before
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    give the guy a break maybe his phone's in a different room or something.

    just 'cause others haven't treated you well doesn't mean he will too.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Word of warning, don't project your bad experiences of the past onto him. One surefire way to start a blazing row and/or a lot of bad feeling.

    Trust the bloke until he gives you a reason not to... how long have you been together by the way?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    since new year technically, but a bit of uncertaintity at the start. posted abit on here about it. he does have commitment and space problems
    and is so laid back its untrue, not a jealous bone in his body. been really good for me though. ive become the laid back trusting person i was before i got messed around by other blokes.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well good! There's mutual trust and nothing has happened to change that except for some silly little falling out. He probably just needs a bit of headspace and I can definitely see where he's coming from (though I get why you're fretting, really I do). Just give him a bit of time and he'll call or text, I'm sure of it :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    briggi wrote:
    I can definitely see where he's coming from (though I get why you're fretting, really I do).


    do i really come across that needy? and paranoid?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    do i really come across that needy? and paranoid?

    Oh dear. No, that's not what I meant at all. I mean that if you've had a little tiff then he might want a bit of time to cool off and if he was out last night he might be feeling a bit rough too. You know what some people are like the morning (and indeed, day) after the night before - bear with a sore head comes to mind.

    Patience is a virtue, don't get yourself worked up over what honestly seems like little to no problem in your relationship.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If I was you ; I'd assume he was cheating...don't take it from me though think of a more rational explanation. I'm just paranoid.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If I was you ; I'd assume he was cheating...don't take it from me though think of a more rational explanation. I'm just paranoid.

    I think that is jumping to conclusions a little bit.

    Maybe he is just angry at what happened and needs a little time to himself to reflect on things.
    Guys react differently to us females.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If I was you ; I'd assume he was cheating...don't take it from me though think of a more rational explanation. I'm just paranoid.

    Great advice:rolleyes:

    There could be a genuine reason why he hasn't text you back - he could just be busy, ran out of credit or his phone has no battery power.

    He could just need a break. Also, as I've found in the past, talking after an argument isn't always a good idea.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Is it all sorted yet? I'm guessing either everything's right as rain and you were worrying over nothing... or erm, the opposite. It always seems to be the way.

    Hope you're alright honey :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What the heck. Since it's a guy who is 'ignoring', take advice from a guy:

    he is NOT ignoring you. You can't believe how often times I returned to my room just to notice I have a missed call.

    If you can't reach him for 3 days and he's not calling, then this might be a sign, but he just as well drove/went to some place and left his phone back at home. I am a cripple without my phone, since I don't wear a watch with me, but still manage to forget it home one day or the other.

    Just because a guy does not call you all the time does not mean he is ignoring you, especially not if he might have a lot of thoughts going on, because of the fall out.

    He might start to ignore you when he returns to his cellphone and sees "49 missed calls".


    /edit: since it's wednesday already and he has not give a sign of life of him, disregard aforgoing post. But I doubt it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    he gave a sign of life! things have still been strained, with both of us complaining to the other that theyre being distant etc. but were ok.

    we do seem to be drifting apart, like with only seeing each other two times a week (compared to bout 5 or 6) and to be honest it does seem to me that he now prefers to be out with his mates than see me, but i do kinda understand, these things happen after so long together and its hard trying not to get too attached as im going away to uni in september. i guess the honeymoon period is officially over!:p
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