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eating problems

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
lately after ive eaten a snack or a meal, no matter what it is, i immediately get the urge to get it out of my system again. even if its as something as small as an apple, i will still be thinking to myself 'god youre so fat for eating that' and i want to get it out again.

i ate some porridge for lunch today and the same thing happened. i just cant help thinking, if i hadnt have eaten that then theres more chance of me losing weight this week.
i admit, its getting to be quite a big problem for me now. so far, it hasnt got as far as throwing up or anything like that, (apart from when i KNOW ive eaten way too much and feel absolutely miserable - which isnt too often) although im certain in the future it will progress to that, and i know im not going to be able to stop myself.

i KNOW im not fat, and plenty of people have told me so - my clothes are testament to that as well, in that im a size 10-12 - yet when i look in the mirror all i see is.. a big person. its as if i see different to what everyone else sees.

i know i really need to talk to someone about how im feeling - but i honestly dont see how that is going to help me! no matter what they say to me i really think im going to still think the same as what i do now.
i just dont know how to stop feeling this way :(

just thought id post. its nice to get it off my chest tbh. theres noone i know who i can talk to about this who would understand

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    blooble wrote:
    i just dont know how to stop feeling this way :(
    you MUST eat 3 proper meals a day. in the past i've done exactly what you are doing now, as well as starving myself for long periods of time. its not healthy and in the end you'll fuck up your insides - and then you'll really regret doing it - making yourself sick after eating. as soon as you start to force yourself to eat proper meals at proper times, you'll begin to stop obsessing about food and it'll loose the control it has over you. but you're the only person who can help yourself. 3 meals: breakfast, lunch and dinner. - try to manage that for 2 weeks and you'll see how much easier it becomes - thats the starting point.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sophia wrote:
    The problem with that is that it doesn't stop you from feeling like you want to throw it all up.
    no it doesn't. but provided that you keep trying it - to eat the 3 meals - it DOES get easier. and the need to throw up gets less. and you start to feel like you're looking after yourself. - which helps with how you feel generally. there isn't another way around it. you either try it or you don't... it helped me a lot doing that and although i still slip up a few times, i know its now easy to get back on track and eat properly. - i know it seems impossible to get over it atm - but you need to help yourself. ETA you also need to get the idea of dieting out of your head.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi,

    I never been in your situation but i can kindof relate. i dance and the need to be thin and feel good about yourself isnt healthy. even though nearly all dancer's are thin, it (feels like it) doesnt matter that clothes and anyone elses word is enough...

    If you really want to lose weight (if you got more confident than you might find yourself more comfortable) then that isnt the way. Exercise a bit more, and EAT yes thats right eat, 3 healthy meals a day. Cos if you start cutting out meals then your body will actually start storing fat.

    Do small things to make yourself feel more confident, something your like doing that you KNOW your good at. Build on it, and maybe talk to someone close to you. Ideally someone thats not bigger than you cos they tend to say 'shut up, look at how thin you are' and dont understand. Ask yourself questions WHY do you need to be thinner WHAT would really change if you did lose weight its not going to change you as a person is it?

    Hope it wasnt to patronising and helps! x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey, i understand where ya coming from coz the same thing has been going on with me.
    Im not really sure either on how to stop it but its escalates so quickly.
    It started in Feb, by just feeling guilty after eating, then i started cutting down how much i ate, then the boundaries keep moving, clothes tell me i aint fat but i can see it in the mirror on my thighes. Then guilt for eating makes u throw it up, then you dont even need guilt, you just get an urge to do it.
    At least you can see its not right and know you need to change something.
    good luck
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hiya Blooble
    It's really hard to admit to these kind of feelings, so well done for taking that brave first step. Sometimes it's hard to see how talking to people can help, but it may just help to speak to people who have been through the same kind of situation and can relate to what you're going through.

    With that in mind, I'd suggest you take a stroll over to the Eating Disorders association website. They've got a special section for young people as well as forums.

    You can also take a read of some of the articles in our eating disorders section here on TheSite - they should help you to understand a bit more about eating disorders, what they are and how to get help if you need it.

    I hope this helps you - take care :)
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