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Don't know what to do

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
:confused:

Well basically, there's this girl, as all these stories seem to start. Quite complicated story but here goes...

She (who I will call 'Liz' to make this less complicated) is the friend of another girl who had/has (dunno which) a thing for me, but unfortunately this was not reciprocated by myself, and I eventually told her this a while ago. At the same time a friend of mine was pretty into 'Liz', but she like me with the other girl, didn't reciprocate her feelings towards him. It was through this that we got talking and we seemed to hit it off.

She eventually told my mate she wasn't into him and he was pretty gutted, but he moved on and is currently involved in a bit of a romance with another girl at the moment:heart:

I always thought that 'Liz' was pretty hot, but through talking to her I really felt myself becoming attracted to her because I felt our personalities got on so well. I started to notice little things such as the way she looked at me and the fact that we seemed to maintain deep eye contact for ages after speaking to one another. I really thought that if we continued getting on as we were something might happen.

But then when casually asking her what she was upto over the coming days she mentioned she was going to see another lad who i'd never heard mentioned before. I made a couple of daft jokes before asking if she was seeing him, to which she replied "kinda".

Although I feel I managed to hide it, i was pretty gutted. What should I do? Do I bother pursuing it or just forget it? Although everything I've read on the site says that it's often better to make friends with someone before stepping things up, generally i've found that the girls that i've been into prefered me as a mate rather than anything more.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    erm...........:confused:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Smiffo wrote:
    generally i've found that the girls that i've been into prefered me as a mate rather than anything more.

    Unfortunately I think you might be in the same situation again here. The way you got into the friendship with her is fairly platonic and might have put you in the 'friend zone' pretty much straight away. The way she replied seems to me like she's not interested in you as more than a friend (although of course it's hard to judge when you don't know someone!), otherwise I'd have expected a reply like "Well I was thinking I might do..." with a suitable pause for you to say something like "No! Go out with me instead!" Maybe that's bollocks but "kinda" just strikes me as being either she's not sure how things are going to work out because it's still a new thing, or she suspects you like her and doesn't want to hurt your feelings by saying "yes" straight out.

    You could try telling her how you feel before she starts "definitely" seeing this guy, but you do run the risk of making her feel awkward and compromising the friendship. I personally would wait for the relationship to run its course and then make a move if you still feel the same about her - if she's dating this guy (or considering it) she must like him, and so to cut in at the last minute and hope she'll drop everything for you seems a bit too much like a movie scenario to me. Then again life can sometimes be like the movies, so who knows?
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