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Cider!!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
What can I put in a big bottle of cider, that won't poison a person, but will put them off drinking it? Also so that the cider won't look obviously tampered with..

I was thinking of salt, and I tried soy sauce, but its made it foam up :s.

I just need something that will make it taste vile.
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Comments

  • JsTJsT TheSite Graduate Posts: 18,265 Incredible Poster
    FilthyChav wrote:
    I just need something that will make it taste vile.

    You don't need to do anything.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    stock, vinneger, cough syrup, mustard, salt water would prob be better than salt but it might make it cloudy
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Theres nothing wrong with good cider. Thatchers, Kopperberg, Magners and so on. I love it. Good old Devon. I also have a large flagon of Leg Bender apple scrumpy i got on my birthday :thumb:

    Whats so wrong with cider?

    Gavman back me up here.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeh.. first I thought vinegar, but naaah too similar a taste. Then I thought olive oil, but its too thick, it wouldn't mix properly. I have some orange squash mix, but I think it would be too obvious a taste.. I need to make it taste undrinkable, but not like its been messed around with.

    And, no, wee isn't an option. :p



    Its not nice cider.. its Morrisons Value Cheap White Cider.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Renzo wrote:
    Kopperberg,

    :heart::heart: mmmm pear cider :yum:

    aparently in weatherspoons there selling a new one, pineapple or tropical or something strange sounding, it might just tempt me into the local 'spoons
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Piss in it. Then again it'll still taste like cider
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    melanie wrote:
    :heart::heart: mmmm pear cider :yum:

    aparently in weatherspoons there selling a new one, pineapple or tropical or something strange sounding, it might just tempt me into the local 'spoons

    Ive only tried Apple and Pear. Theres a summer fruits one too. After my exams im going to indulge in my own mini cider festival. (with friends, not on my own)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    loads of tobasco ?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    unless theyve never tried the stuff before theyre bound to notice the change in taste?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hmmm.. well.. its my uncles, and I won't go into too much detail.. but hes beastly. He's been staying at ours for over 2 months now, and everyday at 4 he starts drinking cider, which carries on until he staggers up to bed at 9pm. I think he has about 5 pints a day. I'm fed up with him as hes as unpleasant enough as it is sober, so... I want to ruin his daily binge.

    Hes not a serious alcoholic.. I don't think he'll go mental on us.. hes just a lazy lard-arsed pile of tramp who thinks he knows it all.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Something like herbal flu tablets they will disolve and quite simply make it taste really vile

    Good idea.. though I don't want to make him ill. That might make him stay even longer.

    He's meant to be looking for a job and a new flat, but instead he sits around getting drunk and criticizing everything we do.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well you could replace the cider with apple juice and vinager, so it tastes the same but doesnt get him drunk :lol:

    or maybe put some of that stuff for putting on your nails to stop you biting them in it, that's supposed to taste horrid, right?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    why are your family even letting him stay?
  • Teh_GerbilTeh_Gerbil Stalin's Organist Posts: 13,327
    I'd try putting some white spirit in it.

    Sure, he might DIE, but never mind.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ballerina wrote:
    why are your family even letting him stay?

    probably because he's family?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    z01 wrote:
    probably because he's family?
    yeah he's family but its still no excuse to be a lazy arse and get pissed everyday while other people look after you
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    true .. still .. if you were leave a brother to live on the streets it says a lot about you ..
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    z01 wrote:
    probably because he's family?

    Exactly. His wife kicked him out before christmas, basically because he was a drunken beast to live with and was always criticizing the kids. He came to stay for 2 weeks, then went to live at a mates for a while, who eventually had enough of him too. He's been back to ours 4 times now, and this time its been about 10 weeks.

    He was a teacher but resigned due to stress and is living on benefits, until they give him his pension - he's about 54. He's meant to be looking for a job, and getting a house, but hes refusing to have anything but a council house with extra bedrooms so his kids can stay. So he sits around telling me and my bro whats what, and my mum can't do a thing.

    So we're stuck with the miserable old bugger.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    mmmm greensleeves.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    .
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Telling you want to do?

    If so, I'd tell the old cunt to jump under a train. Probably not a very harmonious solution, though.


    He's not exactly the ideal uncle... he insults me a lot, but to him its just a bit of fun. I don't dare say anything back, because he used to shout at his kids a lot, and I don't think he'll be going anywhere soon. It would just make the atmosphere a whole lot more unpleasant.

    Hes making things hard for my parents aswell, as people don't want to come round anymore, because he really lacks any social skills. Last time my step-dad's very respectable parents came down, he got very drunk and picked fights. But he's kinda wedged himself into living here now.. leaving his stuff everywhere, and pretty much taking control of what goes on in the kitchen, that its hard to get him to go. He keeps doing things like offering to babysit my brother, and cooking tea, so we have a reason to keep him.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Who's brother is he, your mums or your dads? Can they not have a quiet word in his lughole?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My mum's... he has no-where else to go - no other family, and no friends. When my mum and stepdad say something, he's quick to say he's getting himself sorted, but no action is being taken. I think he's enjoying getting attention and being kept.. I think he feels hes alright here permenantly now. The spare room he's occupying is filthy and stacked with his possessions, its like he's moved in.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your family needs to put their foot down tbh, its their home - not his, he needs to get his act together
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    .
  • JsTJsT TheSite Graduate Posts: 18,265 Incredible Poster
    Telling you want to do?

    If so, I'd tell the old cunt to jump under a train. Probably not a very harmonious solution, though.
    Swwwwwwwooooooooooosssh Fizzzzle
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah, I guess its up to my 'rents. At times like this I wish I didn't have such a friendly family - we always have some oddball hanging around, sponging off us. I'm the only person whos got the balls to tell people where to go - its just not my place to do it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Magic mushrooms, or normal mushrooms. I've tried it ands it's rank! :yuck:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Why dont you mess with his head, one day mix apple juice and vinigar and mix with half cider so he wont get pissed as easy, then the next mix in some kind of spirit so he gets pissed on one pint, then after a few days of this, piss on him when he's asleep.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    have you tried a soluable vit c tablet?
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