Home Sex & Relationships
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.

Sex before marraige

13»

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    \
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well acting upon them then.

    I'm not unreligious, I have sex. It's a lazy point used by people who don't have a better one.
  • SkiveSkive Posts: 15,282 Skive's The Limit
    Kermit wrote:
    And besides which, how does "test driving" solve anything?

    Some people just click in the bedroom. That I know from experience. People are guranteed to change that much and at least you start off on a good one.
    Weekender Offender 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Neither have I. read my posts more carefully.

    Taking out all the "my mate" caveats, you did actually:)

    You were implying that people who wait are "often" coerced into doing this through "guilt" and "sinful feelings", not because they actually feel its important to them. Why else use the plethora of "my mate ses" examples?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Skive wrote:
    Some people just click in the bedroom. That I know from experience.

    Yeah, some people do just click in the bedroom.

    Normally because they either hate or love each other- passion is the driving force. If you have passion you'll have good sex, and if you're getting married I'd expect to see some passion there.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Kermit wrote:
    I'm not unreligious, I have sex. It's a lazy point used by people who don't have a better one.
    You're married. If you acted upon your natural human urges without being married, would that be considered sinful in some religions? Is masterbation considered sinful in some religions? Is that a natural human urge?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    There are some guys out there who are willing to wait, cause my sister waited until she were married to have sex first time.

    I personally waited until I was in love first time. (And still am with the same guy)

    Would hated to have waited until marriage but understand why some people do wait.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Kermit wrote:
    I'm also still waiting for someone to explain to me why they think sex is the only thing that counts in a marriage.

    who said it was?

    yes, i'd want to have sex with someone before i married them. i'd also want to live with them, talk to them, laugh with them, travel with them, deal with problems with them, do things with them, cry with them, eat with them, sleep with them, do everything i might want to do with them. i would want to know them inside out before i made that kind of commitment.

    no, no one can look into the future and say that they will never change, but surely it's not a stupid idea to want to be as sure as you can be that everything will work out?

    and i don't think that being sexually compatible with someone that you love is necessarily a given.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    kaffrin wrote:
    and i don't think that being sexually compatible with someone that you love is necessarily a given.
    I agree with you personally, but I also think if you REALLY love someone, then that is much more important than whether youre sexually compatible when it comes to marriage.
  • SkiveSkive Posts: 15,282 Skive's The Limit
    I can understand why some people would wait until they're in love, but not until they're married.

    If the only thing holding you back from having sex is the fear of being a 'sinner' then I think that's sad.
    Weekender Offender 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Skive wrote:
    I can understand why some people would wait until they're in love, but not until they're married.
    I dunno, I think I can understand it. Being married not only means you're in love, it also means (theoretically) that you will never fuck anyone else. I guess it's a commitment thing, which is probably kinda useful when you wanna have kids together.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Skive wrote:
    I can understand why some people would wait until they're in love, but not until they're married.

    Because of the commitment. Marriage is about far more than just being in love and having great sex.

    I think its sad too to not do something through fear of being "sinful", but it's naive to say that anyone who waits is doing it because of it being "sinful". Some people want to wait for the commitment, and I really don't understand the bile towards those people.

    The best marriages are ones where the partners are best friends, not best lovers.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    \
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    IWishIWas wrote:
    This is how I see it. Like, it's not sex before marriage, but sex before love. I think it's just the case that marriage is seen as proof and a symbol of love, and therefore sex should wait till then.

    Sex is for love.
    What is love? How is it different from lust? I love curries but ......
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you dont love curries. you like curries.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you dont love curries. you like curries.
    I know what I love. I like cheese on toast but love curries, a really hot vindaloo is an almost orgasmic experience for me.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    dont be a twat. You prefer curries to cheese on toast. You can say you love a food but it just means you like it loads. Its not love, like in when youre in love with another person .
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    dont be a twat. You prefer curries to cheese on toast. You can say you love a food but it just means you like it loads. Its not love, like in when youre in love with another person .
    No its not like being in love with a person but we use the word "love" a lot nowadays. To me its the next step up from liking something.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    dont be a twat. You prefer curries to cheese on toast. You can say you love a food but it just means you like it loads. Its not love, like in when youre in love with another person .
    It's more likely to be true with food than people. I can't live without food. :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think it's sensible to have sex with someone before marrying them. Sexual compatibility can't necessarily be learnt, and for the most part I'd say it isn't. For me, sex would be a large part of a partnership or marriage; for others it might not be so important.
Sign In or Register to comment.