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Being humiliated on purpose?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
edited January 2023 in General Chat
Now,Im gonna start clubbing and stuff (as soon as my mate turns 18) and am really worried about the girls.
The thing Im worried about is when I was at school all girls did and said to me was be nasty,humiliate me and generally let me know I was shit.
So,in clubs are there girls who will do this on purpose as well,i.e. pretend they like me and then just start slagging me off,throwing drinks at me or something?
And,would they give signals for me to go over and try to chat (yeah right, :rolleyes: )and then do things like just walk off or laugh in my face or things like that?
I know these are dumb questions but Im really worried about this.
Post edited by JustV on

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I doubt any girl would humiliate you on purpose, why would they. Yeah there are some girls that will take you for a ride to try an get a drink an that, but if a girl is really interested she will give you the right signals. Try not to worry to much about it an just go out and have a good time, enjoy yourself!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Totally. There aren't really that many girls that would treat a guy like that. There'll all too busy trying to get drinks and what not to be bothering about being horrible.
    Girls just bitch at girls on nights out.

    So it'll be fine! Just go dance! And enjoy :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if your confident in your approach, i doubt many girls would have be able to make a fool of you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you need to lighten up on yourself. girls generally don't start chucking their drinks over nice guy s- we save that treatment for the smarmy, full of themselves types. Just be yourself, don't try to impress - you will end up looking stupid. Chat to girls as if they were a friend - don't put pressure on yourself to get a date with them. When you hit it off with someone you'll know - and you'll know what to do!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sambuca wrote:
    you need to lighten up on yourself. girls generally don't start chucking their drinks over nice guy s- we save that treatment for the smarmy, full of themselves types. Just be yourself, don't try to impress - you will end up looking stupid. Chat to girls as if they were a friend - don't put pressure on yourself to get a date with them. When you hit it off with someone you'll know - and you'll know what to do!

    Heh, good advice. I need to see more of that drink throwing though.... :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hmm....I`ll belive it when I see it. :chin:
    Whats the best way for a bloke to dance then?Any tips on this because Im a complete dancing retard............... :blush:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The Leaf wrote:
    Hmm....I`ll belive it when I see it. :chin:
    Whats the best way for a bloke to dance then?Any tips on this because Im a complete dancing retard............... :blush:
    On a dance floor that's completely full, so no-one can see how shit you are. :D No-one can dance anyway. And the ones that can get the piss taken out of them for trying to hard.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yeh no need to try hard. its better to not think about what you are doing, so it comes naturrally.

    personally i think the dancefloor is not the best place if your worried about rejection, as some girls litterally go from guy to guy, or lead guys just to tease

    by the bar is the best girls hotspot i rekon
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well,I probably wouldnt go and speak to girls wherever anyway.........I think Id be wasting my time.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The Leaf wrote:
    Hmm....I`ll belive it when I see it. :chin:
    Whats the best way for a bloke to dance then?Any tips on this because Im a complete dancing retard............... :blush:

    get drunk (obviously not so your gonna chuck up or something..) then you won't care, just like everyone else there who's drunk and dancing like shit :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    remember that was when you were at school, so a good 2 years ago. people have changed since then - so have you. chances are you'll see some of them out but just blank them and get on with your night like they're not there.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The Leaf wrote:
    Whats the best way for a bloke to dance then?

    The mashed potato. :thumb:

    On the original topic, I have never witnessed a woman (girl, whatever) humiliating a bloke on purpose in a pub/club. I've seen the odd drink chucked but I'd say that's usually deserved, and I've seen a few blokes chuck pints so it's not only women who do that.

    If that kind of humiliation has happened a lot to you in the past (and it does sound very cruel and disheartening, so I feel for you) then I strongly recommend changing the females you socialise/associate with; as most normal people don't do that shit.

    Some girls won't want to chat with you, but you'll only find that out by dipping your toe in the water. A smile, bit of eye contact or saying "hi" if you're standing at the bar together. They probably seem like colossal steps but it's just normal interaction, to be honest, and the more you do it the less scary it will seem. Have fun with it, go out with the intention of having a good time and chatting to as many randoms as possible. It will increase your chances of meeting a nice lass, and you won't feel so mightily disappointed if nothing comes of it - because it'll still have been good craic. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    briggi wrote:
    Have fun with it, go out with the intention of having a good time and chatting to as many randoms as possible. It will increase your chances of meeting a nice lass, and you won't feel so mightily disappointed if nothing comes of it - because it'll still have been good craic. :)
    I'd just like to add that randoms actually means randoms, not just girls you like the look of.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'd just like to add that randoms actually means randoms, not just girls you like the look of.

    I'd just like to add that I concur. :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    me and fil do the mashed potatoe at work
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well,I`ll give just trying to chat a try.Its not like Im going out to make sure I pull I just want to meet people and make some new friends........ :wave:
    Oh,and I didnt socialise with the girls at school its just they were mixed classes and if some girls came into my class.............well I could be told how shit I was and I didnt even know they were in my year!!! :confused:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    P.s when im out thurs or friday should I be prepared with condoms or is this too forward and make me look like Im only after 1 thing?
    Just want to make sure just in case............
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The Leaf wrote:
    P.s when im out thurs or friday should I be prepared with condoms or is this too forward and make me look like Im only after 1 thing?
    Just want to make sure just in case............

    You can do, it depends what you fancy I suppose, as long as you're not a total dog you could probably find some minger to have terrible drunken sex with, but I wouldnt recommend it.

    Just go, chat, meet people and dont stress about trying to chat people up. You're there to bloody enjoy yourself after all.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The Leaf wrote:
    P.s when im out thurs or friday should I be prepared with condoms or is this too forward and make me look like Im only after 1 thing?
    Just want to make sure just in case............

    Well presumably your not taking condoms in the hope of a water balloon fight so you are after one thing :confused:

    Umm...take them by all means but the chances of you needing them are next to nothing. First ever time in a club you aint gonna get laid mate. Good luck to you and I hope you do get laid if thats what you want but I doubt it.

    As for the dancing thing - not many people dance well. The key is not to worry about it. You shouldn't be on the dance floor to look good you should be having fun.

    I think your planning a bit too much ... you seem to be strategizing this like a war. Just go out and have fun with your mates, talk to some hot girls, have a laugh
    :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jon_UK wrote:
    I think your planning a bit too much ... you seem to be strategizing this like a war. Just go out and have fun with your mates, talk to some hot girls, have a laugh
    :thumb:

    Exactly, its really not that important, just go and enjoy yourself, you may or may not meet 'that special someone' but if you manage to meet someone you can stand to spend more than 5 minutes talking to you've done well.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'd suggest keeping a condom or two in your wallet, you never know. There's nothing worse than scoring and not having one :grump:

    Don't fret about it. Have a laugh. Some girls will be happy to blag a drink off you, some girls won't want you near them, some girls will like the look of you if you let them. Just have a laugh, don't strategise anything. If you're reasonably confident there will be at least one lass who'll like the look of you- although you may not like the look of her.

    Don't aim to score, and you'll be fine.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Weeeeellll...............Im not going out now anyway so I have nothing to worry about.Iv got tonsilitis again (4th time this year!! :thumb: )and Iv got no money and just cant be bothered really.
    Thanks for the advice though........I may use it one day if I ever go out.
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