If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
Parents are breaking up
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Well i already more or less knew, but they confirmed it on sunday. They're not together anymore. On saturday night my brother showed me a valentines card to dad from another woman. The deal is, no one is going anywhere for a while yet. No ones getting a new partner...my mums plucking up the courage to tell her parents because they get ill with worry easy.
I feel bad because i'm not overly gutted about it, i wasn't upset when they told me. I dunno if its cause its still sinking in and i already knew. I'm just dreading it when the time comes for new partners...i'm just worried suddenly at some point i'll have a step-parent just walking into my life and bringing a heard of step siblings with them...i dunno if i'd be able to handle that because we've always lived in this house together...and it's falling apart.
Sorry just needed to rant...
I feel bad because i'm not overly gutted about it, i wasn't upset when they told me. I dunno if its cause its still sinking in and i already knew. I'm just dreading it when the time comes for new partners...i'm just worried suddenly at some point i'll have a step-parent just walking into my life and bringing a heard of step siblings with them...i dunno if i'd be able to handle that because we've always lived in this house together...and it's falling apart.
Sorry just needed to rant...
0
Comments
As for new parents, well, it depends on them I would say. My dad's the one who remarried, and now she's halfway made twins, but she's a wonderful person and I'm happy about it. What I mean to say is, don't hate their new partners (if there will be any) just because they're not your parents. The "evil step-parent" is a cliché too, and most often not true.
As long as you remember that it's probably better that way, and your parents remember it too, you'll be fine. Get on with your own life, everyone has big changes once in a while.
do you know what's going to happen with regards to where you live etc?
my parents divorced when i was about 6 so i can't really remember what it was like but i know i'm glad they're not together anymore 'cause they weren't happy and they are now.
Shit happens...my one's are separated but still live together for the sake of my dad.
Like others have said, don't feel bad that you're not wailing and tearing the house apart. There are many reasons you probably don't feel that way, at the moment at least, and it shows maturity that you're managing to take it in your stride as much as possible.
Try not to worry about things like new partners, and don't let yourself get anxious about your Mum telling her parents - take time and let yourself adjust to the change. It's a new chapter in your life and I'm sure it'll be utterly shit at points, but you'll all muddle on through. You're still a family, even though the tangible "family unit" won't be there anymore, remember that.
If you need to rant, or talk, then you know where I am and I owe you one. Feel better.
Sometimes love just fade unfortunatly.
If a step dad come along, it might be weird for a while, but you will get use to it and I am sure your mum would find a good man.
My Step-dad brought me up as is on and I love him for that more than I love my real dad.
At the end you can end up being loved by more people than you already are.
Mine got devorced about a year ago... still living together though... after they got devorced and went to sell the house... my mum got brest cancer, and a few months later my dad had a heart attack! Wasnt a good time!
They are selling the house this year though, to be honst I think it will be nice on the whole family to finally settle things!
As the others have said, dont feel bad for not feeling bad about it. I didnt... mainly because it was a long time coming, so I had pretty much got used to the idea!
your parents are doing the right thing if they feel that they aren't good together anymore - as for step parents, im sure both your parents are wise enough to pick people who will be good to you as well as them(if they will get married again at all!). i know it can be difficult to accept step parents, but it's at that point that you have to think of what'll make your folks happy too....
My parents split when i was 17, and i found it really hard. It was also anything but amicable which only made it ten times worse. There is no right or wrong way to feel in this situation and your emotions will change over time. Just make sure you keep talking through your feelings and not bottling things up.
Same here, it will be 3 years this August since my mum moved out, it all just seems normally now really but at first i thought it was a bit of a shock considering they never seemed to argue or fall out or anything.
The new partners thing you deal with, although the parent that you live with you are probably going to see their partner/kids more so it's best to just try your hardest really to get along with them so you make the right impression even if inside you are quietly seething and just wishing they would piss off.
Just take each day as it comes and at the end of it it's probably all happening for the better in the long run even if it doesn't feel like that now